Part 9: Lamplight Caverns
Part 9: Lamplight Caverns
So I need to find another one of those vaults to get a G.E.C.K., right? Figures that I need to be the one to check the database.
Aha, this must be the one. I wonder what they need stasis chambers for, though?
What did someone see me using the computer? Well, that saves me some time, at least.
“Entrance to Vault 87 will be particularly difficult for you, I’m afraid. Unless, of course, you have a way to deal with lethal levels of radiation which surrounds the Vault. However, there may well be another way. Vault 87 is located very close to the site of Lamplight Caverns. It is entirely probable that the Vault may be entered from within the caves. Unfortunately, the Brotherhood simply cannot spare the resources necessary to investigate the area. Perhaps you may be more successful. If you do find anything, please return here so that we may decide on how best to proceed. I wish we could do more, but the Brotherhood potentially faces a very pressing, very real threat in the Enclave. All of my efforts must now be devoted to assessing the threat they may pose to us. I’m sure you understand.”
Well that figures. “Freeman, go do that one really dangerous thing while we sit back here and watch.” Story of my life.
He said Lamplight Caverns, so let me just type that name in here…yep, shows up in the “landmarks” section. Damn it, that’s another load of walking to do. Why can’t people put important stuff all close together?
Well, maybe I can try out this neat laser gun while I’m out here. Hey, what’s that firefight over there?
More power armor guys! Are they mad that I have a laser gun?
Well, the suit’s all red and black, so I guess they must be evil.
This laser’s pretty neat, though. Works a lot like the old tau cannon, but with a more sophisticated design. No charge mode, but at least that means it won’t blow up in my face. The chassis is still cool; it must have a really good focusing device.
“Way Back Home” by Bob Crosby
The roads are the dustiest, The winds are the gustiest
The gates are the rustiest, The pies are the crustiest
The songs the lustiest, The friends the trustiest
Way back home
(Back home)
The trees are the sappiest, The days are the nappiest
The dogs are the yappiest, The kids are the scrappiest
the jokes the snappiest, the folks the happiest
Way back home
Don’t know why I left the homestead
I really must confess
I’m a weary exile
Singing my song of loneliness
The grass is the springiest, The bees are the stingiest
The birds are the wingiest, The bells are the ringiest
(the hearts) the hearts the singiest
(the arms) the arms the clingiest
Way back home
(What about the sun) The sun’s the blaziest
(And the fields) The field’s the daziest
(And the cows) The cow’s the graziest
(And the help) The help’s the laziest
The boys, Are the wittiest
The girls, Are the prettiest
Way back home
The pigs are the snootiest, The owls are the hootiest
The plant’s the fruitiest, The stars the shootiest
The grins the funniest, The smiles the sunniest
Way back home
Don’t know why I left the homestead
I really must confess
I’m a weary exile
Singing my song of loneliness
The food is the spreadiest, The wine is the headiest
The pals are the readiest, The gals are the steadiest
The love the liveliest, The life the loveliest
Way back, way back, way back, home
(No place like home)
Home sweet home
Looks like there’s someone living down here.
I have to say, whoever it is used Christmas lights to great effect.
“Don’t take another step, or we’ll blow your fucking head off! You’re big, and no big people are allowed in. You better just go out the way you came in.”
Oh yeah, well fuck you, kid!
“Are you flipping me the bird? Fuck you too!”
How do you like this? Double sized! Take that, you stupid kid!
“Don’t you stick your tongue out at me! Ha, ha, ha, ha! You’re all right for a mungo, you know that? Alright, come on in. I think we can trust you.”
That’s better.
Man, there are a lot of kids around here.
Come to think of it, I never saw too many around outside. Maybe this is where they keep them, like some kind of wasteland day care center.
Wow. It’s like some cross between Lord of the Flies and Beyond Thunderdome in here.
(I said I’d do as little talking as possible, but I couldn’t resist. Having the Child at Heart perk means he gives you the unique laser rifle “wazer wifle” for free.)
“So you’re welcome in my town, at least until you start screwing up. Once the bullshit starts, you’re out on your own again! And don’t think of going the other way; that way’s called Murder Pass for a reason. I suppose there’s always the other door, but the computer’s busted, and not even Joseph can make it work.”
“A bit big for one of our kids, but you seem alright. What’s your story down here? Are you here to help me fix the computer? That would be great. The computer’s not really broke, but it sure don’t work right. I turned it off because it was just wasting power. I could turn it on for you to work on it, though. Come on. It’s over here.”
Even kids know exactly how to put me to use. Well, I shouldn’t complain; guessing passwords is the closest thing to a mental puzzle I’ve gotten my hands on.
Easy as pie.
What, mini-Hulks? Taste my crowbar!
(In homage to Half Life, I killed two Super Mutants and a brute at once with just a crowbar.)
Whoa! Total immolation! I love this laser gun!
What the hell happened in here? This doesn’t look anything like that vault I woke up in.
Ew. Is this where the mini-Hulks are getting produced? Looks like it doesn’t work with everyone.
Hmm. Nah.
Too busy killing and grabbing loose ammunition.
(Here and Now usually isn’t a good pick, especially not right away, but for a speed run…)
Is the G.E.C.K. seriously in there? Man, and I have to walk across that…I don’t think even the HEV suit would be enough for that kind of spill.
What luck, an anti-radiation suit and medical countermeasures!
I feel ready to take on anything.
Did the protective seal really need to be this elaborate?
Got it!
Finally. Now to get out of here, and—
Ugh! Not again…
I hope…they don’t…have…trash compactors…
“Yes sir! I’ll have the techs come down and remove it immediately, sir.”
“You’re certain he’s unharmed?”
“Yes sir! He’ll pass out shortly, but we can revive him.”
“Excellent. Prepare him for transport immediately.”
“Right away, sir!”