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i briefly consider slitting my wrists but eventually calm down. its ok, i can just kill them AFTER i open the front door


anyways theres this big rotating red thing in the next room. its pretty easy to dodge as long as youre not an idiot


NO ASSHOLE DONT FOLLOW ME GO BACK


god damnit. why are scientests so retarded?


well i reload my save and run accross the room and turn off the big red thing before any scientists have an opportunity to fuck things up by dying again


i decide to just take one at a time, and even then it was still a challenge. apparently the relatively simple task of following gordon was far too complex for these theoretical physicists


yeah scan those eyes bitch


Scientist 1: "Well, I--


WRONG, BITCH. I DO NOT CARE.


thought just because you were useful you would be saved from the wrath of Gordon, eh? INCORRECT


COCKSWALLOWER


he deserved it


i go back and kill these guys for good measure


its important to be thorough


apparently the front door leads to a slow as hell mechanical rotating door. im sure thats helpful during emergencies


wheee


oh boy, the outside.


this asshole tries to sneak up on me but i could hear him jerkin off in the corner so i was ready


gaywad


those military assholes are hogging all the fun


the turrets are easy enough to take care of although they are still fucking annoying


surfASS tenSHIT


i find some soldiers taking cover behind exploding barrels


god did the AI just stop trying or something?


i come across a dam that i probably have to get accross


and a helicopter. its cool until it starts shooting at me


theres also one of those rocket turrets accross the bridge. i guess the most strategic way would just be to run accross as fast as you can


this may take a couple tries


well it turns out that you can blow the rocket launcher turret up with the crossbow. whatever.


if its so secure why the FUCK WONT IT OPEN FOR ME? god damnit. that means i have to jump down into the water on the other side of the dam. and i am not in the mood to deal with any water chickenshit bullshit.



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