Part 3: Level 100
EDIT: Holy shit, GOLD? You guys rule
03: Level 100
So consider this, in the first gen pokemon games you can get a level 100 pokemon with only the first gym badge. As a result you are awarded with possibly the best killing machine available, because seriously no one actually trained their pokemon to level 100 for in-game...Right? Welp, you don't really have to consider it because I'm doing it either way, off to Cerulean City!
If you haven't beat Brock yet there's some annoying dude who literally grabs you by the hand and goes "HEY COME SEE THE CITY WITH ME." And you can never avoid him no matter how much you try... Well actually you could walk through the wall behind him with no issue but otherwise you're pretty much forced to fight Brock, then he just disappears...
Obligatory shorts kid, man I don't know what you translators were thinking of for this kid.
This is also intensely satisfying because Mt. Moon has always been a big impasse for me as a kid. Zubats truly are the worst wild pokemon to frequently encounter. (Whoever thought up of supersonic should supersonic...his.....ears....I guess)
Okay enough of that, it's time to get to work. See when I say we're going to Cerulean CITY I really mean the CAVE. We need to catch an important wild pokemon here.
That special pokemon is Raichu, who turned out to be a lot harder to find than I originally thought. The reason I have a dodrio fighting for me (not pictured: 2 hypnos) is because Raichu was taking several encounters to find and my slow-ass low level pokemon didn't have a chance in running away from anything 50 levels higher than them. All these junk pokemon are going to the PC anyway so it doesn't matter.
Now, the reason Raichu (who will be named Fatty from now on because seriously look at his sprite) is important at this time is because he has "Growl" as a move, which decreases a pokemon's physical attack power if you can't remember. I could have gotten any other pokemon like a spearow or something with growl, but then I would have had to train it to a decent level to not die in a particular fight. Fatty just cuts out the middle man in this situation.
Now you may also wonder "Wait, but won't he disobey you?" well as I remember saying in the first update, any pokemon you catch at any level will listen to you, regardless of what badges you have. It's only traded pokemon that will turn their backs if you don't have the appropriate badges, stops kids from trading over their hypergods although, in this trick I'm using that's kinda been annulled.
Our next destination is the grass patch next to the nugget bridge, glad I can just avoid all the trainers, although I still fought Gary because I was worried of him ruining the delicate process of this trick. (Fatty wrecked his shit)
The grass patch contains these dudes, Abras. The chilliest pokemons in the pokeuniverse. Abra is important becauseit knows a move no other pokemon (well I guess its evolutions) does in gen 1: Teleport. Now you can also use Dig or Fly with this trick, but since Teleport is the earliest move available, we'll use that.
Now we stand here, exactly one square above the bug catcher that resides in the grass patch we were just in. By the way if you already fought him at this time then reset the game cause you fucked up. If you already saved your game after fighting him there is a chance to this trick again with another trainer but it comes much later.
Now, 2 very important things you should do before I go any further. 1: Save at this spot, there is a lot of room for error for the next step. 2: Make sure you had your pokemon healed last at the Cerulean pokemon Center. I can not express the RAGE one feel s when teleporting to Pewter or god help you even Pallet town becauseihadtodealwiththatlike5timesbecausei'mstupidandugggh.
If you have all that covered, proceed in pressing down on the D-Pad and pressing start RIGHT AFTER. You should safely be at the start screen without having to go into a battle. Use abra's Teleport, the bug catcher will go all MGS Spotted on you but you'll teleport away to safety...
Well, actually your sprite will freak out and turn into lines and shit. I can only imagine the pain Red (or I guess Met) must be feeling as his body is being manipulated by Abra's sadistic transportation powers.
After successfully teleporting back to Cerulean's pokemon center, go into Misty's Gym and fight this joker. You will not be able to press start at this time, so I hope you got your Raichu/fearow/whatever at the front of your party. Well okay you can switch them in during battle but time is levels. (not really)
The swimmer has a Horsea and this shellder (look at that tongue), you can do whatever you want to the Horsea, but this Shelder is important. You must use growl 6 times on this Shelder, exactly 6. I'll explain why soon, but until then just do it, after that you can safely thundershock it to submission.
After fighting the swimmer go back to the nugget bridge under normal circumstances (Don't walk on the barriers or any stupid shit like that). You can use the start button now and arrange your party for the upcoming event. Make sure you have a good number of poke/great balls stocked. I mean I have master balls so it's all good but in your sharkless case I would be prepared. Oh yeah I did mention pretty much everything I did so far was without gameshark right? Besides using WTW to get around easier and getting an overpowered Growler I mean.
Once you're ready, go up the nugget bridge. When you change routes the start menu will come up by itself, DO NOT PRESS ANYTHING ON THE MENU, SIMPLY EXIT. (check out that dude chilling out at the top left, I always wonder why he appears there.)
Leaving the start menu... Gets us into a battle? What could it be? What STRANGE CREATURE could POSSIBLY attack us when we're not in the grass or in a dungeon area? What unholy glitchy abomination will encounter us through this strange and bullshit-sounding series of events?
Q: Oh wow a Mew! As if no one has heard of this trick before! Way to make a lame build up for something the majority of internet already knows.
No, that's not it. The level, look at it's LEVEL. It's level 1. In the first generation pokemon games, it was impossible to encounter any pokemon under level 2 in a normal circumstance, but here we are fighting a level 1 pokemon, MEW of all things. How does this happen you may ask? How did Mew appear in the first place? You may know of the glitch but can you explain it?
When you teleport from a fight like I did earlier, the game still thinks you are fighting something, which is why the start screen doesn't work. When you decide to fight something the game didn't expect you too, the special stat of the last pokemon you kill will determine what will appear on the nugget bridge after leaving the start screen. In addition to it's special, the pokemon's level is determined by how you affect the attack of the last pokemon you fight.
You can lower the attack of a pokemon by -6 or +6. If you lower the special pokemon's move 6 times like Fatty did with growl, then you will face a pokemon at level 1. Likewise, if you somehow raise the pokemon's attack 6 times (is there even a move in gen 1 that will raise the opposing pokemon's attack?) the pokemon that will appear will be level 13. If you don't do anything to the special pokemon's attack, the pokemon appearing at the nugget bridge will be level 5.
You can pretty much get any pokemon with this trick, I think if you fight the other trainer that isn't Misty in the Cerulean Gym a Nidoqueen will appear (a level 1 Nidoqueen if you're so inclined). However not all Pokemon can be caught. Apparently, the following pokemon you can't get via the glitch are pokemon that don't evolve twice (like growlithe or snorlax), all legendaries BESIDES mew (how convenient!), nor the caterpie, weedle, or dratini evolution lines (which means no level 100 dratini if you want one that badly).
Of course I caught Mew easy, but it apparently has a tricky catch rate so if you don't have master balls stocked just grab what you can get. Looking at its stats it only knows 1 move, pound. For the uninformed Mew can learn any HM in the game, as well as a plethora of other moves, but all I will teach it will be pound. Pound is all Mew will need, yes.
Next we need Mew to obtain less than 54 Experience points, you can use any low level area for this. In my case I used the grass patch where Abra was caught and switched out Mew with Raichu to insure low exp gainage. Now it may not seem like much but....
Oooooh SHIT. What just happened?
Well as I said earlier in Gen 1 games you could not encounter level 1 pokemon through conventional means. There was no coding for them, as a result, level 1 pokemon had NEGATIVE experience. Take a look at Mew's stat screen again to see for yourself. Now if a level 1 pokemon obtains less than 54 exp, the game will count it as negative, and it won't like that. Therefore the game will scramble and try to find the highest possible digit (in this case 2 ^ 24 -1) and wrap it around the exp gained, and obtain it to Mew. Whereas Mew would have normally obtained a measly 26 exp, it instead received over 16 MILLION Exp. This would actually give Mew enough exp to get to level 246 but the game quickly reverts it to the more acceptable level 100.
If you obtain Exp over 54 the calculation will wrap into a small positive range, only allowed Mew to level up to 2... Also you get worse stats when doing this compared to manually training a pokemon to level 100, but seriously who gives a shit we're not playing multiplayer.
So! That is how you get a level 100 pokemon before even having to fight Misty, of course your choices of pokemon may be a bit limited at this point of the game, but Mew should be good enough anyway, hell, a level 100 weedle would probably suffice. Let's go wreck Misty's shit with Mew and call it a day.
Huh, I could have SWORN Misty had 2 pokemon instead of 1, a staryu and a starmie. Maybe she just wants to cut to the chase with starmie?
Wait what did Misty just send out she's not supposed to have that OH NO THE GAME IS TRYING TO STOP ME FROM BREAKING IT.
Too bad for it I HAVE NO INTENTION OF STOPPING. After Mew pounded that... Thing to death it left behind a q and Misty gave me money and just left...
Okay I'm done Bullshitting you this is what I really did. You remember how I used a gameshark code to catch H poke last update? Well the particular code was "01C3D8CF". The "Root" of this code as I like to call it is "01XXD8CF". Where the XX is you can pretty much replace with any hex and something will come out of it, it can be a regular pokemon (Like Gengar earlier), a pokegod (Like H poke), or a trainer (Misty) in the wild! Now the Trainer's are special in that they are, well, trainers. They all use their own unique pokemon it seems, but not a lot of research has been done on them. I think it's just because they are pretty normal, I mean hell even when I tried to get H poke the first time his pokedex entry froze my game, the trainer pokegods don't even have a pokedex!
How do I know? Well I decided to fight Misty again a patch of grass with a "Steal pokemon from trainer" code on!
When stealing a pokemon from any trainer the battle immediately ends. Perhaps the pokedex entry doesn't show because you stole it from a trainer, but you can't really catch these guys through any other means (There is at least one exception I know of).
Blocky (That's what I'm calling him cause his name is just a glitch block) is a normal/flying type pokemon that has the same pokedex number as dodrio, which explains its bird-type moveset. It's cry is similar to the jingle that plays when you successfully catch a pokemon, except slightly slowed down. Its sprite is... Well a clusterfuck really, I see a bit of Bulbasaur on the top but other than that I'm clueless. Maybe a bit of Lt. Surge? You guys figure it out.
Blocky doesn't have any glitch dex entry or anything like that of his own posted on the internet, he among other rejected boring pokegods are kinda shafted since they don't really have anything gamebreakingly glitchy about them. In other words, they are the magikarp of glitches.
It can fight fine though! I'm not sure if it learns any TM/HM moves, we'll find out as time goes on (and when we get our infinite candy supply). When using him in battle Blocky is missing a chunk of his bad, humorously it kinda represents his battle sprite's shape if you think about it reeeaaalllyyy hard. He leaves a random q behind every time you use him in battle, get used to seeing q's. Gen 1 glitches really like "q" for some reason.
Now, another thing about glitch trainers is that depending on where you fight them they may have ungodly levels for glitches, the most common ones I've seen have levels up to 111. With this in mind I decided there should be some preparations, like fatty, fatty the raichu is too weak to stand up against this stuff, and he should toughen up! So I take him to the grass left of Cerulean to train.
Wait, where are his moves? They're all... Blank, I guess I may as well try out this Misty type one at the very top?
Uh-oh what just happened FATTY WHAT DID YOU DO.
DON'T YOU IGNORE YOU LISTEN TO ME RIGHT NOW AND, wait why do you have my name, DID YOU JUST STEAL MY NAME.
Ugh just kill the bird already oh man there's letters flying around everywhere and we're going to have a long talk when we're done about this you fat identity thief how do you know hydro pump anyway.
what (look at that attack holy shit)
My Raichu is EVOLVING!? Wait, does this mean the rumors are
Wait how did you just
I DON'T EVENHAVEA
HOW IS THAT EVEN
No lie, after the spearow died, I went through nearly TWENTY evolutions, all involving either Fatty or this mysterious "g g" that just suddenly appeared on my team. It was easily the weirdest fucking thing I saw all day, and after all that the game took me back to normal.
I bring up my start screen, only to find out my character name is erased by glitch blobs. Curious, I tried to see what pokemon I had now, and then the game froze
Next time: New impressive pokegod, an explanation on what just happened, and SS Anne I guess
Bill's backyard/garden. All four spaces of it, no grass patches here!