Part 25: Bonus

Wow. What a website! How about that FYAD, huh? That really is something awful! Seriously, there's so many avatars in here, Richard Garriot could start a new game series! Hey Brett, I got an idea. LET'S PLAY solving problems on your own instead of askign strangers for help!

But seriously, folks, this is crazy! Brett's been posting all this shit on the Interent? Wow! No wonder he's turned into such a ladies man suddenly! Let's see if I can get this camera phone thing working...



Wow... that doesn't look right at all. I guess I should return this thing to Brett, but...

Here's the thing. According to this thread and - well, everyone I know - apparently I'm not very funny. Senso humoro non existo. But that's crazy! I know I can be funny. And I know the ladies could like it!

So I invited all six of the girls I know to the hot tub... here's how it's going down so far. You'll never believe the deal I'm striking with them!

That's right, Internet! It's your dream come true! Instead of helping Brett, you get to help me! Danny!

...I'll wait for you all to stop gagging.

By the way, how about that Dark Kid, huh? Talk about Resident Funny! And that Tasian guy? More like Osu! Omake! Ocrazyjapanese music! Plus that Nightmare Accountant - I've never heard an Aussie play Devil May Cry so much besides that one time Paul Hogan...

...uh... played Devil May Cry so much!



Now check THIS out!



Ah? Ah? This is where YOU come in! If you can help Brett, there's no way I can fail! (By the way, how funny was that coin stuff earlier, right?)




Alright! Now I just gotta make the six of 'em laugh, and BOOYA! Hook-up ahoy! Set sail for sexville! Vaginal penetration off the starboard bow! Argh matey, thar be somethin' that smells like fish here and it ain't fish!



Hells yeah! Let's do this like Brutus!



Alright, Internet... how would you make six gorgeous babes do the "Ha" shuffle? The laugh tango? The hysterical foxtrot?




Note: Also...



The game says this like it's a good thing.

Don't you know anything about comedy? I need a follow-up!

So talk about good karma- could I have asked for a sexier audience?



So talk about good karma- could I have asked for a sexier audience? The only difference between this and seventh grade is that now I WANT the pretty girls to laugh at me.



One of six secret laughs found. At this rate, I'm only the antichrist of comedy.



Alright... let's go for numero dos!




Current vote tally - going by previous. Karma line is reset to zero, so vote if you want to use it again.

1. ... Any shopaholics out there? (1)
2. ...'Welcome to Snow Bird Mountain.' (1)
3. So talk about good karma... (0)
4. So, extreme sports, huh?... (0)
5. ...individualized humor... (2)


Maybe I should try some individualized humor.

No need to help me - I'll start with Shana.



What? Hippies like Buddhism. It's a law.



No, no, no! #3 ain't funny!



Belial42 has the right idea!



BAM!



Two down.



Never marry for genetics - people will start accusing you of having an auxotrophy wife.
Yeah, my membranes need to go on a diet- I've got some major nitrocellulose.
You know what RNA should stand for? Really Needs A-life

Never marry for genetics - people will start accusing you of having an auxotrophy wife.



Darn.



Alright, I've got a corny one I know Becky will like.
Oh no.

Hey, why not?



What does an interrupting cow sound like?
What did the monkey who was waiting for the train say when it ran over its tail?
What do you get when you cross a Rhinoceros with an Elephant?

Lotsa jokes I can do here, Internet! Unfortunately, Becky wasn't gonna be an easy chick to crack.

What do you get if you cross an elephant and a rhinoceros?
What?
Hell if I know!

Get it? It's a play on Elephant and Rhino! Brett told me that Elliot was going to try this exact same joke a few days a go during some Cyrano thing, but he'd convinced him not to! Anyway...



Yeah, I couldn't tell jokes like that though. I'd just lead to me to crash and burn! And I was no Goose! I was an Iceman! Or a Maniac at least! Eh? Wing Commander? Top Gun?

At least at the end of a losing streak, I'd think:



Beyond that, though... losing this bet I somehow managed to get the girls to agree to... It'd be a drag!

In fact... I think it'd go a little something like...




Well... I guess the stakes weren't too high - even if I lost, I'd win! Yay Danny!

But I was in it for the gold! If I was gonna win this thing, there was only one way to go about things.

Hey Becky, what does an interrupting cow sound like?
I don't know, what-



...Whoa. I'd never noticed the weird, perfectly horizontal hairline Becky had. Did Brett know about that?



Now, it was time for some Asian love, and I wasn't talking Egg Fu Young! I meant for some Ha Pu Tang!



Nah, those two were corny even for me!



And that one was... NOT MUCH BETTER! But still.

The south is the only place where saying something's as hot as a 'goat fart in a pepper patch' is a good thing.



I bet that diabetes guy would totally agree.

Only two more girls to go!



Like it or not - and I know you do! - Kiki didn't.



I decided I had to use it to my advantage! Like the NES Advantage? Uh. Anyone?



There were a few things to think of.



I mean, I knew she was an ice queen, but I didn't know she doubled as the abominable snowman!



Gotcha! Five of six! Hells yeah!



My final challenge.



... I couldn't think of anything. Not a single joke.

Not a laugh in the world.

Aw, who am I kidding- you have as much chance of laughing as I do getting laid by 40.
Ha! Damn it!



Ho shit! Eat it, baby, yeah!



Damn right you don't...



And damn right I am!

At this point, the game shows the character portraits of the six girls and screen flashes white after each one.

Hells yeah! Kisses galore! Time to return Brett's Blackberry! But...



Oh I will!