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Sweet Jesus is this game ever slow until you start getting sidekicks and can get some good dialoguing on. Oh well, it can't be more than a few dozen updates away from that (I kid, I kid)

Alright you giant midgets, one or more of us is or are going home in a body bag! And at least one of them is not won't be me! So look forward to that or not!

Take a few steps back buddy, there's no shame in going on the offensive backwards. All part of the strategy. Attack, withdraw, hopefully someone else intervenes and kills them for me

Anough playing around, it's time to kick this genocide up a notch

Seems we're finally alone. Time to go at it, man-o a sharga-o

Fuck, I didn't see where that freak kept that large, ringed orb, but it can't have been comfortable. I'm hesitant to even touch it...somehow I always imagined sexy adventuring to be sexier than this

But, you know, different color, size and shape. Otherwise it's identical!

Upon closer inspection, it does not appear to have been up the green goblin's ass. Reassuring, but I guess the how and the why is beyond my deductive skills

Holy crap it's a map! And it shows hidden areas, like those little inlets located along the wall. Fred The Architect and Perry the Builder never accounted for the possibility of a magical mapping saturn in their plans, and now all of their sweet secret bounty will be mine

Huh? Why the christ would this scroll be in this room when it so obviously intended for the council room? Just what room is this, anyway?

Touche sign, touche.

It's also interesting to note that you can see enemies on the projected map as little green dots. There aren't any enemies around because I've cleansed the place, making it hard to illustrate, but take my word for it. Maybe I'll use this thing again someday

Another shield. At least it's not a refurbished table top. Shields are still only used by pussies. Blocking is for the weak, the real hero takes to blow full in the face and asks for another (upon regaining conciousness some hours later). There had best be some better shit than this here or I'm going to write the angriest journal entry this keep has ever seen. And that includes the entry that Lance was writing as the shadows were disintegrating his flesh. Man was he ever not cool with that

Luckily this sweet hammer will make short work of that sign, and it won't go spreading no lies about how incompetent I am! Surely there can't be a better weapon in the immediate vicinity, say within five squares

Make a fool of me twice will you, stupid room? I'll take this new awesome sword, but please note that you're on fucking notice. Anymore nonsense out of you and it's fucking curtains. I pity whoever I run across next, as I will use this sword to put them in the hurt locker and then put that locker into an even bigger hurt locker

Now who's this crazy ceiling teleporting fucker, and is he aware of how badly fucked up he is about to be?


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