The Let's Play Archive

The Bard's Tale

by Stabbey_the_Clown

Part 22: Chapter 6 - 01b




Chapter 6 - 01b

You chose to be Nice. That was the right call. If you're pure nice, you get the swig for free. If you're pure snarky, you pay full price for a swig. If you're nice and snarky, you pay a discounted price. But in the end, the result is the same.


Gower - Nice


Gower - Snarky


Gower - Nice and Snarky in some order





: Well, my warm-arsed friend let us share a drink and a new friendship.
Gower: Ah, but would you be my friend if I didn't have something you very much needed?

: I see you're a man who thinks ahead. I bow before your wisdom, and hope you share your warm brew with a fellow traveler in need.



Gower: Very well, you seem to be a kind enough soul. Please take a generous swig of me magical brew, on the house.

The Bard took a swig from Gower's mug. After a moment, he felt the brew take effect. The chill faded from his body, despite the snow, the Bard felt as if it was a warm summer day.

: Aaahhhh... Magical and tasty.
Gower: Aye, and let us not forget, potentially deadly.


: That may be something you'll want to put on the warning label.
Gower: I be Gower and ye've fallen right into me trap! Now let's discus the true price of that brew.





Gower vanished behind a blue cloud of magic, and when it dispersed, he was not a man at all, but a mischevious Peerie Trow.



: Oh, the old fake peddler trick! My mother always warned me to be careful who I drink with... or is it whom?
Gower: Now that ye've drunk from me jug, yer under gesa. Unless this curse is broken, ye will remain a prisoner of this mountain wasteland for eternity.
: As long as my arse is warm.



Gower: In the mountains lies the sword Casgair, a sword fated to be me doom. Ye will fetch me this sword, and only then will this curse be lifted to set you free. ... In layman's terms, give it to me, or die on this mountain.



: For once, to everyone's amazement and approval, the Bard was speechless.

Gower teleported away.

"He's bluffing!" the Bard said. "There's no curse. Now, let's get out of here."

The Bard attempted to leave the Mountains, but as he got near, a terrible pain wracked his body, and he was forced to retreat.

Gower's Curse





: Our hero was under a potent spell, and had to obey the command of the Trow or suffer a horrible demise.

The Crone had been studying the Bard, and spoke up with admiration - not of the Bard, naturally, but of the curse he was under.

Crone: I hope you don't mind me saying that I'm quite impressed with the curse put upon you. Quite deadly, and quite powerful. If I were you, I'd either fetch this sword of which he speaks, or make out your will. ... Wow... very impressive. Some fine work there.



: For some reason, I don't share your enthusiasm.

The Bard continued onwards, deeper into the mountains. Despite the storm, the wolves were out in full force.



The Bard wandered through the snowy canyons and encountered a nasty pack of Kunal Trow.








Once they were dead, the Bard noticed a large ship tied up beside a river. The ship clearly had been there a very long time.





"Vikings don't abandon their ships," the Bard noted. "So this means that... they never came back."

The Kunal Trow had ransacked the boat's contents, but they didn't appear to have found anything useful. But they probably missed the Hide-a-Purse stump.

"These things are EVERYWHERE!" the Bard exclaimed. "I should have gone into the stump business instead of getting stuck in a frozen wasteland!"

The contents of this stump, were not among the greatest treasures the world had ever seen.



The Bard continued on, exploring the maze of canyons. There didn't seem to be a clear path, but there were more Hide-a-Purse stumps with meager stashes of loot, and plenty more wolves and Trow.





The Bard continued on, and eventually came to the river again. A piece of ice was jutting out into the river. On top was a chest.



An Obvious Trap




: Hello... what have we got here? A chest in the middle of nowhere. Obviously a trap.

The Bard shouted to make sure the ambushers would hear him.

: You know I'm not going to be lured in by such an obvious ploy!



The Bard sat back and waited for the attack. It didn't come. He waited some more. Still nothing.















"Oh... what the hell," he said, approaching the chest.

He levered it open with his sword, but no trap sprung. Inside was the tune for the Upgraded Mercenary.




Upgraded Mercenary
Mana Cost: 100 -> 200
Health: 78 -> 137
Damage: (8-20) -> (11-35)
Armor (2-6) -> (2-20)

While I'm at it...

Upgraded Rat
Mana Cost: 25 -> 100
Health: 5 -> 11
Damage: (1-5) -> (32-92)
New Special: Leap Attack

Upgraded Thunder Spider
Mana Cost: 75 -> 150
Health: 66 -> 138
Damage: (3-7) -> (7-13)
Upgraded Special: Chain-lightning stuns multiple enemies.



The Bard was so busy summoning the new helper that he didn't notice the trap springing.



"All too easy," said the Druid Cathbad, causing the Bard to jump.

The Druid was behind him, with a small group of Kunal Trow. The Bard felt confident he could defeat them.

: Damn, I fall for that every time. I knew it was a trap!
Cathbad: So, you're the one giving us such trouble. To tell you the truth I am a bit surprised. I expected you to be more... formidable.
: That makes two of us.
: Nobody asked you!
Cathbad: Since I control your fate, I don't think I really need to be asked. Don't you agree?



: No, I was talking to... Never mind.
Cathbad: If you're speaking to your maker, you might want to mention you'll be seeing him very soon. Farewell.


With that, Cathbad shattered the ice. The chunk of ice the Bard was standing on came loose, and it was pulled along by the swift current.





"Ha! You missed!" the Bard shouted defiantly.

The Mercenary, however, was peering into the water with a concerned expression

"Uh, Bard...?" the Mercenary started.

"Not now," the Bard replied, still focused on Cathbad, "I'm still alive! The ice didn't shatter! So much for your plan!"

"Bard, I've got something to tell you." the Mercenary said.

The Bard ignored him. Cathbad turned away, satisfied that his work was done.



"HEY! WHERE ARE YOU GOING! COULDN'T FIGHT A REAL MAN!" the Bard shouted after the retreating figure.

"I-I think we're in trouble here!" the Mercenary shouted, finally catching the Bard's attention.

"Alright, what is it?" the Bard grumbled.

The Mercenary pointed into the water. The Bard looked into the depths... he could see something moving. Despite Gower's warming brew, he suddenly felt cold again.

"Something's moving down there?" the Bard asked with dread.

"Finfolk," the Mercenary said, "the river is filled with Finfolk".



All Movies:

Gower - Nice


Gower - Snarky


Gower - Nice and Snarky in some order


Gower's Curse


An Obvious Trap