Part 24: Eagle Attempts To Murder DavePART 24 - Eagle Attempts To Murder Dave
Welcome back, folks! It's been a bit of a time trying to beat this map, so let's just get right into it. At the very least we have a new CO to play with!
Everybody welcome Sami. I have no idea how good she is but I'm interested to see what an infantry specialist can do.
Only on mission 8... god. I don't actually know how many missions there are in this game. Maybe 20something? Which means we aren't making much progress at all.
Also, nice of the title screen to just straight-up reveal that it's Eagle we're fighting.
I was disappointed enough to be fighting Eagle. Imagine my face when I saw the Fog of War. Again.
We can only see two units, Andy. Admittedly they're bright green, so yeah, we know.
I wonder if other Green Earth COs exist?
Andy's text boxes are really awkward here.
Also, yes, I remember Eagle. He was the smug asshole that I managed to completely defeat by ignoring half the map and dropping an infantry off near his HQ with a T copter, right?
I'm being specific because it's eerily similar to my general strategy for this mission.
Sami's caught up to the rest of us now.
"Hey, we found an independent battalion of Green Earth troops. Maybe they're the independent battalion of Green Earth troops we've been hearing about."
Well, she's right there, to be honest.
Max is impressed. He must feel like a primary school teacher right now. "Well done, Sami! You figured it out!"
Hey, don't lump me with her. I know exactly what's happening, who we're fighting and what's going on.
It's a surprise to me too, Max.
"...My dude bailed me out whilst I did nothing of use." Finish the sentence properly, Captain Dipshit.
Don't praise him. He's useless.
"My dude's help"? I broke my back carrying this fucking kid.
Let's roll, huh? I guess we should.
OK, strategy. This map... Christ. Eagle starts off with a small army, but it's more than enough to threaten my forces. He has 3 bombers and 2 fighters jets, which are the biggest problem with the map - a bomber and a fighter jet charge you on the first turn, and they can be on top of your forces by the second turn; so, we need to sneak out, take out those two bro copters, and sneak back in time to bait out the jet and bomber.
And that's just the first half of the map.
So, the first thing to do is load up our new friend.
"Uh, heya." the guy says, giving everyone a wave. He's young, has an eyepatch, and wears lots of strange and gaudy colours. There's a real "hipster" vibe about him, and when he speaks, he has a strange accent. "My name's Vladimir, ve're the Vladimir Volunteers. Ve heard there was a shortage of men in your army, so ve've been sent to round out the numbers."
"I suppose it's necessary." mutters Gareth, shrugging. "Keep yourself safe, kid. I'll keep an eye out for ya."
"Thank you!" Vladimir replies, hopping into a transport copter.
Thinking about it, I don't recognise that guy either.
As the Gareth Group get into Bernard, the new copter on the block introduces himself. "Hey. I am Cedric, and this is the Cedric Copter. Uh, yeah, that is about all I can say."
"Charmed, I'm sure." Bernard replies, leaning back in his chair and opening a bag of sweets.
Dave clambers into the Michael Multitude. We need to get all the units who aren't attacking in the next few turns to safety. Sami grants additional range to transport units, which is going to be pretty handy for ferrying people around in this map.
Lastly, the Alfonse Alliance just moves backward, out of enemy range. He's a soft boy.
Hey, look! It's the Mulligan Missileers! Man, it's been a while. I want to move him into range because he can take on a lot of Eagle's units quite well, and his vision range in Fog of War is pretty large.
The Cassandra Corps move into range. Cassandra has her eyes downcast.
"...Must I fight my fellow countryman again?"
The answer is yes, yes she does.
The Howard Heap, feeling the stress of battle, comes to help.
See, I've been tactical here. Attacking the bro copter with a fighter jet first means it can't counter - if I'd have attacked with my own bro copter, it would have sustained unnecessary damage. Plus, attacking it from the right with my jet allows me to use the jet's massive movement range to still get out of enemy jet range next turn. This is crucial to success.
One thing I will point out - Cassandra is in a bomber's range. Learnt that the hard way; we have to block off every available side to prevent it from getting to her, hence why I've parked Bernard in front of her there. Down below, meanwhile, Cedric drops Vladimir off at the mountain. This will also be crucial shortly.
It's the Rose Rank! She's flying a bro copter for this mission, since medium tanks aren't going to be terribly useful against bombers.
Speaking of, though, we're gonna move Tina and Wilbert up. Firstly because they are adorable together, and secondly because there's a tank coming and Eagle's AI refuses to attack Tina. In this position the pair of them can easily destroy it once it shows up.
Alright, Eagle, let's dance.
I prefer to think of them as Andy's babysitters.
Spoilers: he makes good on this promise, actually. He is definitely no pushover.
...Isn't your whole gimmick letting units have two turns, though?
Ominous plane noises can be heard in the fog. One from up there (the fighter) and one from the south (the bomber).
We've got one turn to get all those five units to retreat and get everyone in position to safely bait the bomber.
This is my setup. As you can probably guess, the bomber's range is juuuust up to my units - currently Vladimir and Cassandra are in range. So, you might be wondering, what's the plan?
Well, bombers can't quite one-shot a mech on a mountain. The 4 defence stars allow him to survive, so we'll be using him to bait, hence why I dropped him off down here on turn one. Unfortunately, there's no way to reach the enemy bro copter with an anti-air on turn one and have it out of range of the bomber by turn two. So, my solution?
Cedric. Bombers can't attack air units, so with Cedric taking up this space here, it'll have to go one to the right and one down to attack Vladimir, who is the only viable unit in range.
...If you can't already tell, I spent a lot of time on this map. The first few turns of this map have been fine-tuned to virtual perfection.
The predicted assholes come flying out of the fog, exactly as I guessed. The jet's a little more south of where I expected it to show up, but it won't matter much.
Monsieur Bomber goes for Vladimir. Eagle falls right into my trap.
Nice one, Vlad. You tanked that like a fucking pro.
And now for some well-earned vengeance against these two motherfuckers.
Mulligan, if you would.
Yes... yes. Perfect.
Can't one-shot my units now, can ya? Huh? Huh?!
I've also started making a habit of checking the enemy CO meter. Eagle's is looking a bit full - taking out that jet is probably gonna fill it... hm.
Cassandra moves in.
And doesn't do all that much damage. Cass, for an anti-air unit, there's not a lot that you can one-shot.
Howard has a decent chance of finishing it off, though.
And we got it!
...Yeah, that's what I expected. You might be wondering, "CP! What do you intend to do about the bomber? Even at 1HP it might, uh, I dunno, hurt something."
This was my plan. It occurred to me that Eagle's AI might be smart and refuse to use Lightning Strike if there's nobody who can use it - surrounding the bomber with unit types it can't attack would probably trigger that. (I was proved wrong later in this map, but it's best to be cautious. I'd spent too long trying this map to let anything fuck me over.)
So rather than move the Larry Lot into that space, I get Michael to drop off the Dave Division.
Alright, this Lightning Strike will probably be next to useless. And once we're through that, we're making good progress!
The bomber goes for the only target he can. It amuses me that you can do the good old Fire Emblem archer trap with planes like this. I need to try it with enemy artillery some time.
Wow. Didn't do a single point of damage.
- Eagle, moments before plinking away at a single infantry unit.
Dramatic sting! Exciting actions!
Alright, my turn again. Let's just put it out of its misery.
Michael carries Dave to safety, though I don't drop him yet.
Also, now that Lightning Strike is out of the way, I can go after this tank without worrying much about Eagle's CO meter.
"Nice shot, Wilbert!" Tina grins. Wilbert blushes a little.
"Thanks. Don't hold back now - and at least try to show me up."
Tina's eyebrows lift. "Recovered some of your confidence, huh? Glad to hear it - now watch me go!"
~Please excuse us for the Mulligan interlude.~
~We hope you enjoyed today's Mulligan interlude.~
Back to Tina doing things!
"Not even a challenge!" Tina yells, looking at the destroyed tank with a smile. The fog rolls ahead of her, and she loses her grin for a moment. "...Wilbert, we'd best hang back. I've no idea what's waiting in the fog."
"Backup from the south is coming soon, Sami said." Wilbert replies. "Just a little longer."
Backup from the south arrives. Now we've dealt with that initial wave of bro copters, the bomber and the jet, everything else in the map is pretty stationary - only attacks when we get close.
And to prove this point...
...OK, I heard an infantry move, but they don't count. They just capture buildings and do nothing useful. Enemy infantry, that is. My infantry are great and I will not hear a single bad word about them.
So, speaking of only attacking when we get close... sorry, Michael.
"Michael, are you really throwing your life away like this, again? Again and again?"
"Yup." Michael replies, grinning. "I told you my secret. I'm not going to die."
"I'm still not sure if I can believe that you have psychic powers." Dave mutters. "What if one day you die and don't come back? Don't wake up in a field a short walk from the wreckage of your vehicle?"
Michael doesn't respond.
I move Bernard and Cedric up, carrying their mechs. We'll need them to have any chance of beating this map quickly.
Day 5 already... OK, when I say quickly, I mean "quickly for me". I'm not that fast at this game.
The bomber comes in.
"Michael, look out!"
"We've baited him in." Michael replies, watching carefully. "Take him out as soon as you get an opening, guys!"
As usual, Michael explodes in a horrifying wreck but not really. This time, however, is different.
"Oh my god." Dave whispers. He was close enough to see exactly what happened. "Oh my god."
"Dave, what's up?" Tina asks.
"What's up is that Michael is full of shit!" Dave yells, pointing at the destroyed APC. "I cannot believe I thought he was telling the truth... oh my fucking god. MICHAEEEEEEEEL!"
Dave is in a bit of a tizzy.
No time to worry about that, though; we have bomber numero dos to deal with.
Luckily, Mulligan has obscene range.
"Mulligan, are you going to actually kill any of these things?" asks Howard. Mulligan stares at the ground awkwardly. He seems to have something he wants to say, but then decides against it.
"I, uh... yeah. I guess I'm just, uh... missiles are acting up a little. Yeah, let's go with that." he lies. Howard buys it, though, too distracted with his own troubles to think about what exactly Mulligan just said.
He flies off to deal with the threat properly.
God, there are few enemies in this game as satisfying to kill as a bomber. I think it's the size. Makes you feel like you've taken out a sizeable threat when you see it dropping out of the sky.
Luckily, that's the only real threat nearby...
As we can see, Eagle did nothing. Next time, we press forward and actually finish the map! I'm away this weekend so I can't do the full map as an update, my apologies. But I'll be back with you all soon!
The Barracks: Cassandra and Lucy 2
Lucy spots Cassandra in the barracks, sitting alone, and walks over to her.
Hey! she says jovially. Cassandra glances at her.
Are you alright? Lucy asks.
Cassandra breathes a sigh. I have had a stressful day. First, dealing with Eagle then coming back to find you just returning from a mission yourself. You, flying alone, makes me nervous.
Cass, why exactly are you so afraid of heights? Lucy asks. My old man said I used to be scared too, but then he took me up in his bomber and helped me realise that its perfectly safe! Maybe if you flew for the first time-
It would not be the first time. Cassandra mutters. Can you keep a secret?
Of course. Lucy says, becoming deadly serious. She sits down properly and looks across the table at Cassandra, who gives her a blank, almost worrisome stare.
I used to be a pilot for Green Earth. Eagle in particular was my Commanding Officer we were a professional team of fighter jets.
Lucy listens with interest. Her mind is racing.
I had many close allies in that team. One in particular was a man I could have called my brother we were as close as siblings. Unfortunately, on a mission in Orange Star - a simple scouting mission - we were shot down. The entire squad was killed.
No Lucy breathes. Cassandra wipes away a brief tear.
All but two were killed, to be more apt - I survived, as did my brother in arms. Saved by Orange Star doctors, we intended to leave, but upon discovering that we originally came from Green Earth, and were part of their military, we were forced to sign up to the Orange Star army against our will. Cassandra explains, staring at the table, unable to meet Lucys eyes.
My brother in arms blames me for the loss of the squad. I had failed to locate the enemy missile squads. Cassandra says hoarsely. He hasnt spoken to me since we woke up in those hospital beds. If you wonder why I do not like flying any more there is your answer.
Im so sorry. Lucy says, trying to sound supportive and kindly like Tina. I had no idea. Cassandra, I know you dont want to be here, but please let me know if theres anything I can do! I want to at least make it nice for you!
You do. Cassandra murmurs. Thank you, Lucy, for your companionship."
But who is he, Cassandra? Lucy says. If you dont mind my asking.
His name... is Mulligan."