Part 58: Interview 29 - “Naval Nightmare” (Or, “Bote Fight”)

Interview 29 - “Naval Nightmare” (Or, “Bote Fight”)

So, the day has come. Yellow Comet must now face Black Hole one last time.

Time for another hysterically unfair factory mission, I take it?

This one's not too bad, actually.



Adder…

Oh, shit, it’s this guy. Haven’t seen you since, like, the first interview.

Who’s there? Who dares address me?!? Oh! Hawke! It’s you.

He sounds underwhelmed.

I’d be nervous if my boss suddenly showed up at the eve of such an important battle.

It appears that you’re behind schedule. What’ve you been doing?

I-I’ve been delayed. But only slightly. It’s no problem. We’ll be in control of this tiny country soon. You have my word.

Do you understand what it means that I am here, Adder?

Oh, it’s like, thematic and stuff. Because Adder came to bully Flak before his crushing defeat, and now Hawke’s put Adder in the same situation.

Frankly, it’s what he deserves. At least most of the other Black Hole COs are… how would you say it? Fun to watch?

Exactly. But Adder’s not even fun, he’s just kind of a creepy dickhead.

If-If I win… If I win here, there’s no problem! That’s correct, isn’t it?

Hmmm… IF you win.

Hawke is not betting on Adder.

You’ll see why in just a moment.



If we claim victory here, we can drive the enemy out of our homeland.

Yes! Let it begin!

YC Soldier: Commander! The leader of the Blue Moon Army to see you.

Olaf?!

It’s been a long time, Kanbei.

If it isn’t Olaf! Why are you here?

I’ve brought along my men to lend Yellow Comet my aid. The Black Hole Army threatens us all. Blue Moon will stand beside you in this fight.

Ah! Kanbei is grateful!

He also like referring to himself in the third person. Bit weird.

We all have our quirks.

With the power of Blue Moon beside us, we cannot lose!



Ah, I see how it is. This is going to be a Yellow Comet/Blue Moon map.

Uh...



Oh god DAMMIT why is he here



He wanted to help. Blue Moon is still here, but... you know, in spirit.

I think I would've preferred Olaf over Dipshit.



It's just one map. Suck it up, my dude.

I'm not sucking shit.



Whoa, goddamn. This map's huge!

Correct. You'll note that the central section is mostly ocean - there'll be much more naval combat here than in most maps.

Ah, you're referring to botes.

I can tell that you're pronouncing that like 'b-o-t-e-s' and not 'b-o-a-t-s'.

It's botes and you're wrong



Is... that a hint to beat the map? Like, do you get something special if Kanbei deals the final blow?

I... don't know.

Attention! We’re moving out for Yellow Comet! Let’s go!



Speaking of, how do we deal the final blow? I assume it's a pipe seam like usual.



Well, why don't we check?



I still find it amusing that Nell gives you the terms of battle regardless of what country you're playing as. It's almost like she's some kind of deity, deciding on the terms of every battle in existence.



Yup, pipe seam. At least it's relatively far away from the actual factory - that way the enemies that spawn won't be much of an issue. But...

Mm. It's in a very difficult position to actually attack, isn't it? Plus, it's blocked by a minicannon.

This is gonna be a chore. Hopefully the map's actually fun to watch.

Well, before we begin, here are the deployments for today.

TODAY’S DEPLOYMENTS
Yellow Comet
Lysander, Infantry
Talora, Infantry
Vanessa, Infantry
Aymil, APC
Ellis, Submarine
Andromeda, Anti-Air
Rose, Medium Tank
Kyril, Medium Tank
Braddock, Medium Tank
Kevin, Battleship
Casildo, Battleship

Orange Star
Dave, Infantry
Alfonse, Infantry
Rin, Lander
Fliss, Tank
Ingo, Tank
Lucy, Bomber
Raynald of Châtillon, Bomber
Lloyd, Battleship
Landon, Battleship

Oh, with this many units, it is going to be a long map. Fewer botes than I was expecting, though I see a healthy number of battleships. This should be interesting!



On his first turn, Kanbei deploys Aymil in an APC. He'll be ferrying around some of the infantry that we'll be seeing soon.



Dipshit, meanwhile, deploys Dave.

Dave, the tankslayer! What a guy, haven't seen him in a hot minute.



And after Kanbei and Dipshit have taken their turn, it's time for Adder. He doesn't do much this turn, besides start capturing nearby properties.



But that enemy battleship is real trouble. It's gonna go over to the area near the seam, isn't it.

That would be tactically sound.



This map does start slow, but thing will start speeding up exponentially once Kanbei and Dipshit start getting their armies together.



Hey, more friends.

It's Lysander and Talora. They'll be doing the usual infantry thing of capturing all nearby properties and forcing them to pay taxes.



Seems like Dave is also on capturing duty. Another base should speed up deployment for Orange Star - they really need a foothold on this map.



Well, more importantly, they need that port. Currently Dave and Alfonse have no way off the island, so they won't be much use at the moment.



Adder's units continue to swell in the meantime. Additionally, his battleship is getting ready to guard the seam, as well as exercising pressure on a large amount of the map.

I hate battleships. Or, more specifically, I hate battleships that are under enemy control.



You know what I do love, though? Infantry. Highly underrated units.



Are they really that underrated? I feel like they're a rather important part of any army. Anyway, Lysander hops into Aymil to get carried further ahead.



Talora will have to catch up on foot. Our final Yellow Comet infantry, Vanessa, also joins the party.

"Hey, you two! Make sure you keep focussed - we need a lot of money if we're to build an army to fight Adder." Vanessa orders. "Rose, and Sonja, and everyone else has their eyes on me... I can't fail."

"You won't. We're gonna do this together, alright?" Lysander replies. "The Yellow Comet Army has stuck together for this long. One more battle ain't gonna be much of an issue."

Vanessa nods. "...Right."

"Come on then!" Talora says. "Let's get to capturing. You know what Rose is like if her plans are delayed!"



Whilst Dave continues his capturing, Alfonse heads north to start on the port. Fliss is also deployed as a tank today - she'll be important later on.



Aw, that's just unfair. This is a bote map, what are these copters doing here?

I believe what they intend to do is "be massive nuisances to Kanbei's army".



Or, you know, the three infantry that currently comprise Kanbei's army.



At least they've started capturing stuff. That should help Kanbei afford some of his more expensive stuff.



Correct. It's a shame Kanbei had nothing pre-deployed, but I suppose this is his major weakness - his expensive units.

Thing is, with their stats? They're absolutely worth the price.



Dipshit's got no such advantages, but he does arguably have a better position - a port right next door and several properties around to capture.



Yeah, they're much closer to the seam. But with the battleship sat nearby, they're not going to be able to approach very easily. Someone's gotta sink that fucking thing.



They'll get around to it. First, back to Kanbei; Adder did nothing of note this turn, though bear in mind that his copters are still on the way.



More importantly, Lysander has reached a base. Deploying from here will be much quicker than deploying next the HQ - efficiency is key, after all.

Time for tanks!

Not quite. He's going to be capturing it for a few turns first.



Plus, you did just request for "that fucking thing" to be sunk, and Kanbei is going to oblige. Ellis will be doing the honours.

Hey, nice, a bit of submarine action. Speaking of, _{lemme just look over the deployments again...}



And Alfonse successfully captures the port, meaning that-

AW WHAT

What?



We have a whole-ass bote map with all this naval intrigue, and Selena in a submarine isn't even gonna show up? She's not on the deployment list!

That's because she wasn't present in the battle. You're fond of her, I take it?

Oh, well, that whole situation's a little bit awkward. More importantly, she's a great soldier, and we haven't seen her since Orange Star!

That is where she lives, to be fair.



Adder's units begin capturing the bases near to the seam. As you can imagine, this will only make the seam even more difficult to approach.



His battle copters have almost reached Kanbei's meagre forces, too.

These copters are not bro.



Hm... I wonder what the best play here is. A two-pronged assault on the seam seems logical, but Kanbei can only really get to it via sea. If he tries to approach it on land, he's gonna have to get past that factory up there... hm...



It's certainly a tricky one. To begin with, Lysander finishes capturing the base.



The rest of the units just finish their capturing and the like. Ellis heads north, with his singular mission of sinking the battleship.

I believe in Ellis. Destroy that fucking thing.



"Hi guys!" Rin says cheerfully, preparing her lander to move out. "Lookth like we need to get you over to these other islandth. Ready to head out?"

"Thanks, Rin." Dave replies, nodding at her. "I think we're about ready. Fliss?"

"I'll... do my best..." Fliss murmurs.



Dave and Fliss hop into Rin, whilst Alfonse stays behind for the time being. She'll be back for him.

Question is, where are they going to go? My recommendation would be the airport up there, come to think of it. Plane support would be useful on this map.



That would be wise. We've seen how a couple of copters can be a big problem.



Speaking of that big problem, those copters are getting closer. And they've brought a whole fuckton of infantry with them. Adder wants all the money in the world, apparently.

It seems sound to me; Kanbei works best when he has lots of money, so limiting his funds by capturing all of the nearby towns seems logical.



Ah, but Kanbei is going to take those towns back. With guns.

He can't take them back. They weren't his in the first place.

Don't logic me, Ruin- you know what, that's a good point.



What?

We're in Yellow Comet. What the hell are the unaffiliated cities on the map? Do they not accept the rule of the Emperor until he brings military force, or are they just Yellow Comet cities that are refusing to pay their taxes?



It's probably best you don't think about it too much. Aymil drops off Lysander next to the port, just so that he's out of the enemy copter's range.



Ah, now that's the kind of thing you need to deal with a couple of bro copters.

Indeed. Andromeda will be taking care of business today. Or, at least, the enemy copters.



Ellis, meanwhile, threads his way past this rather horrible setup of minicannons, and prepares to dive, since he's in range of the enemy battleship now.

Ah, Minicannon Island. I went there on holiday once.

I can't tell if you're screwing with me or not.



Welp, you'll never know. What's Dipshit doing this turn, then? Useless stuff, I guess?



Nope. Quite the opposite, in fact - his units have now been dropped off on the northern island. Dave will be going for the airport, whilst Fliss will be approaching the seam on that narrow road to the north.

Oh, wow, I barely noticed that. Thank goodness Fliss is on the job - she should be able to hold her own against most enemy units.



Speaking of enemy units, Adder's graduated from infantry and battle copters to tanks and artillery, if you look up there. If Kanbei doesn't get a force together soon, he's in danger of being overrun.

Subs are expensive, though. Buying Ellis probably set him back a long way.



Eh, it's Kanbei, even if he gets overrun it's not like his units are in any danger of actually dying.



In order to nab this base before Adder does, Aymil takes Lysander over to it.

Oh, good call. If Adder gets this base it's gonna be a big problem for Kanbei's forces.



Andromeda, meanwhile, absolutely obliterates this battle copter without even trying. Anti-airs really are powerful, especially when they're Kanbei's.

Holy shit, that damage was so high I almost thought Max was here.



No such luck. Ellis, meanwhile, makes a start on the enemy battleship, and with a single hit pretty much neuters it.



OH BOY TANK TIME

Rose Kuroda mans her medium tank as it comes rumbling out of the base, eyeing the oncoming army of Adder's troops with nothing more than a scoff of derision. She addresses her troops directly as she prepares for combat.

"This is our final fight. There is not a single strategy that Adder could use to defeat me; this battle was over before it started. Now all that's left to do is eliminate his forces and drive them from our country, so go forth, soldiers! It... has been an honour serving with you."

"Same to you, Rose." Vanessa says. "I think I speak for everyone when I say that you've more than proved yourself in this campaign. You're the best damn ACO we've ever had."

"Hear, hear!" Talora replies, beaming.

Rose allows a smile to cross her features, and does a little curtsey inside her tank, where nobody can see her. "Thank you. With that said, let's push forward."

"Sounds like Rose has done well for herself since she came back to Yellow Comet." Dave remarks, overhearing the conversation on his transceiver.

"Well, she was always a tactical genius. It's not much of a surprise." Alfonse says. "More importantly, have you noticed that her new coat looks very similar to my dude's?"

"I did, yeah." Dave grins. "I think she rocks the long coat look better than he does, in all honesty."



That's Kanbei's contribution for this turn. It's now time for Dipshit to start helping out.



Well, Dave's making a start on the airport. That's pretty helpful.



Indeed. Whilst he and Fliss attend to their tasks, Rin heads back to pick up Alfonse.



He'll be heading to the island to the east, as there's plenty of useful properties, including another port.



And now the enemy's got a port. Approaching this seam is going to be so tough if Dipshit doesn't get his ass into gear soon. We needed twelve battleships, like, yesterday.

You are aware that battleships are the most expensive unit, correct?

Excuses, excuses.



Well, moving swiftly on...



Ellis is able to eliminate the enemy battleship. Though, now that this infantry has captured the port, more naval units will be arriving soon.

Hrm. He's been dived for a few turns, though. He's not got the fuel for an extended battle at sea.



Rose heads up to begin engaging the enemy. You'll also note that thanks to transport copters, Adder's infantry have landed on the base before Kanbei's units could.

That's a big issue. Thankfully, a medium tank should be able to solve this problem.

Are you certain about that?



Oh, shit. Tanks don't do very well against copters.



Anti-airs do very well against both infantry and copters, though, so Andromeda can help make some space.

It doesn't really matter, though. If Lysander tries to capture that port, the copter can attack him from the seaward side, so it can't be counterattacked by Andromeda.



You're right, it doesn't really matter. Not because of what you said, but because Andromeda doesn't quite get the kill.

Oh, goddammit. He must have, like, literally 1/100 HP left.



"Hey, I'll take it from here." Lysander says, winking at Andromeda as he turns his guns on the enemy infantry and opens fire, finishing them off. "Aymil, do you want to do the honours?"

"Sounds like a good idea. One second." Aymil replies.



Oh, I get it. Aymil's blocking up the base so the enemy can't start capturing it.



Back to Dipshit. Rin drops Alfonse off on this island, and one she moves away next turn, he'll start capturing the port.

Smart move, since he can't start capturing anything this turn anyway. Once he has a port a little bit closer to the seam, Dipshit should have more of an edge against Adder's forces.



And Dave got the airport, nice. Once Dipshit's got more money, it's bomber time, baby.

It's alway bomber time with you, isn't it?

Hey, no, sometimes it's tank time.



Fliss prepares to take on the enemy forces, meanwhile. It's a good job she headed up there - if she hadn't, the anti-airs would have come right across the bridge and started attacking Dave, as well as anything that was deployed from the airport.

Oh, yeah, that would've been trouble.



Adder's turn. An enemy battle copter savages poor Lysander, but thankfully...



...The other copters don't actually do very much. There is a big problem up by the seam though: missiles.

Adder is really, really nervous about planes. Though, considering Lucy single-handedly defeated Flak in her bomber, I suppose he doesn't want to make the same mistake.

And it was a copter that destroyed the Blue Moon seam, if I recall correctly. Air units are obviously the biggest threats to factories.



And then there's that medium tank and submarine outside the factory.

Actually, you don't need to worry about those; they don't move for the rest of the map, so all they do is block up reinforcements. They're actually very useful.

I... huh. Adder, I thought you were better than that.



Kanbei takes out another loan to afford a second medium tank - Kyril's come to join us.

"Rose, I'm here! Just point me at the enemy, and I'll do everything I can to defeat them! We will free our home!" he calls out.

Rose nods. "I appreciate that, Kyril. Follow my orders to the letter and we won't lose."



Lysander gets into Aymil, obviously quite wounded after being shot by a helicopter.



The stupid bro copter did have the immensely poor fortune of deciding to end its turn in range of an anti-air though, so... yeah. Andromeda's got this.



Talora is capturing more property, though with Adder's units so close, that's a dangerous game.

He's not used a CO Power yet this battle. It must be coming soon.



Rose parks herself on the base, as if daring the battle copters across the ocean to come and attack her. Of course, it would be a mistake, but Adder's units are not very bright.



And up here, Ellis has just realised something horrible. Can you see what it is?

..! The port is in range of Minincannon Island! So Ellis can't sit on it and prevent dudes from spawning every turn, and the allied forces can't capture it until that cannon's gone. Urgh.



Quite. It's a very troublesome quandary, but we'll see how it gets resolved later.



The anti-airs approached Fliss but they didn't attack, so Fliss decides to be proactive and slam them with cannons.



And Dave's just going around capturing random stuff to make more money. Eh, I suppose it works.



Rin, meanwhile, is on her way back to base to pick up another unit.



That lets Alfonse make a start on the port. He can take his time capturing it, though, since Dipshit isn't close to affording a battleship at the moment.



Oh, is that tank down there the unit Rin's gone to pick up?

Indeed, that's Ingo. He'll be providing backup for Fliss just in case thing become too much for her to handle.



There it is. I was wondering when he was going to pull this.





His copter decides to attack Rose, and doesn't come out of it too badly. Rose does have the huge defensive bonuses of a base on her side, though.

As well as the huge defensive bonuses of being a Kanbei unit.



This enemy infantry does no damage to Aymil, meanwhile. Kanbei's units truly are built to last.



Good for them, it means I can worry less about them dying. Dipshit's units, on the other hand...



Kanbei can still lose units in other ways - like, for example, fuel troubles. Ellis has gone back to the port to refuel, since he's not doing too well with that.



The copter that didn't attack Rose made the same mistake as that other copter - being in range of Andromeda, who swiftly eliminates it.



Not bad. Kanbei's getting a pretty decent defensive wall down here - he just needs to maintain it.



Well, the best thing to do is remove these offending infantry before they start capturing all of Kanbei's properties. In that vein, Vanessa goes for the one nearest to her.



The rest of the Yellow Comet Army arrange themselves like so. Andromeda, Kyril and Rose will be taking care of the majority of combat from now on.

Well, yeah, that's medium tanks for you. And anti-airs are good at deleting infantry, I suppose.



For now, back to Orange Star. Ingo is preparing for his little jaunt over the ocean.



And Alfonse has finished his capturing. That port's going to be useful!

When Dipshit has more money.

When Dipshit has more money!



There's still a little bit of time before Ingo actually arrives, so Fliss has to fend for herself a bit. She finishes off the first of the anti-airs, however.

Good girl, Fliss, nice job.



Well, this map was looking pretty dire to start out with, but I feel like Dipshit and Kanbei have an actual foothold now. All they need to do is take out that seam... and possibly some of those minicannons. They're just going to be annoying.



Adder's infantry are trying to threaten that foothold a little. Although... this one isn't very good at it.

But Ellis needs to refuel there ASAP! Someone's gonna have to kill him.



You're right, but this infantry is considerably more threatening. This base cannot be allowed to fall into Adder's hands.



Oh, huh, the bro copter went for Aymil. That's useful - Andromeda can take it out now that it's been lured onto land.

I must admit, even for Black Hole units, these copters seem to have astoundingly poor self-preservation instincts.



That was not part of the plan! Is Andromeda OK?

Kanbei unit on defensive terrain, my dude. I'll let you take a guess.

Oh, she's totally fine.



Meanwhile, everything seems to have it out for Aymil today. He's being attacked on all sides.

"Christ, man, what's happening out there?" yells Lysander as bullets patter off the armoured shell of the APC.

"It's all fine, I just- hang on!" Aymil says. "It's high time we got to safer terrain..."



Well, he and Lysander are fine, they just need to get out of the way. The medium tanks are here now.



"Hold on, Ellis! I'll get rid of this interloper!" yells Vanessa, firing on the enemy infantry. She nods as the enemy falls before her, then goes back to her transceiver. "The way to the port is cleared. If you want to come in for a refuel, I'd recommend it."



"Thanks, Vanessa," sighs Ellis. "I owe you one. You want me to draw you a self-portrait sometime?"

"Uh, I'll think about it." Vanessa replies. "You don't really owe me anything. Good job on your mission, though - we'll take it from here."

"Sounds good, good luck!" Ellis says, grinning.



Rose eliminates Adder's tank with a single mighty blow before it can do any more damage to Andromeda.

"Keep your wits about you, Andromeda. I don't want to have to tell Peregrine that you got yourself hurt."

"I'll be fine, well, healthy." Andromeda replies in her usual musical tone. "I will slay these Black Hole bastards right away."

Not for the first time, Rose sighs. Swear words just sound wrong coming out of her mouth...



This opens up a space for Kyril to hop in and destroy the enemy anti-air, clearing a path to the base.

Well, Adder's running out of copters. Now they're mostly out of the way, Kanbei should have a much easier time trying to capture that base.



As it happens, Andromeda decides to take out the last one. Even damaged, she does huge amounts of damage to it. There's no threat here.



You know what, I think Kanbei's gonna be alright now. Most of the big threats are gone and he's got a really solid defensive wall of medium tanks now. Oh, hey, there's a new one at the base!

Three is better than two, so Kanbei has deployed Braddock. And yes, he's got lot of strong units, but he's not made any progress towards the seam, which is, you know, the important part of the map.

My god, you're right. Battleships, Kanbei, as many battleships as you can afford!



On the side of the battlefield where actually important stuff is happening, Fliss weakens the enemy infantry in front of her.



And more capturing goes on. But with the units that Dipshit would be best deploying, he needs all the money he can get.



Oh, hey, there's one of those expensive units. A battleship!

Indeed, it's Lloyd. He'll be providing some much-needed naval support.



But for every good thing that happens, a bad thing must happen. In this case, Adder gets his CO Power again.



I am going to be so fucking glad once we stop fighting this loser.



He's currently not a loser - he's quite dangerous, as this pivotal base is now under his control.

Goddammit, Kanbei, that was the one thing you weren't supposed to let him capture.



And though most of his units are already rubble and broken parts, he does have one tank left, which charges at Talora.



Eh, that could've been worse. Adder's still at the disadvantage right now.



Braddock opens up proceedings this turn by attacking the enemy tank, whilst Talora retreats to heal at the nearby property.



Oh boy, now that she's injured, Andromeda isn't doing nearly as much damage to infantry.



Rose has her back, though. Together, they remove the enemy infantry.



Well, whatever Adder produces this turn, it's probably not going to survive two medium tanks and an anti-air.

Quite, it seems that Adder isn't going to get much use out of his shiny new base. The infantry have gathered to help clean up any remaining enemies, as well as restoring their own HP, since they've taken a fair amount of damage in this battle.



Alfonse, meanwhile, is totally fine, and continues capturing things. He's not in range of the, uh, Minicannon Island, which is quite useful.

Oh, that would have been super annoying if he was.



Dave has finished capturing all the properties in the northern area, so he'll be ready to move on next turn.



Lloyd, meanwhile, heads out to make a start on the enemies all around, and Ingo goes to back Fliss up.



Adder... doesn't do anything useful with his turn. So next time, we'll pick up from Kanbei's turn.

Aw, next time? This map really is long.

We'll finish it next interview, don't worry. In the meantime, I suppose I should educate you on how to spell 'boats'.

You mean 'botes'.



***

Part 29 Additional