Part 35: Sagi Goes to School

All right, last time we were tasked with finding a gadgeteer girl named Lolo. Let's see if anyone knows where she might be.





Music: Temple of Celestial Flowers


That said, I try not to obsess, or her talent could be really intimidating. She lives in Opu, right? I wonder how she gets here through the Holoholo jungle?


Well, that was simple enough. Getting to Opu, however, will be much more complicated. We need a landmark stone to pass through Holoholo Jungle, as there is no means of obliterating a new path in that direction.





Head Teacher: The reason for that, of course, is that the headmaster himself personally imbues it with magic.

Excuse me, but I'd like to ask to borrow that landmark stone if you don't mind...

Head Teacher: What? You again? Come to mock me again, have you? So you're another one of the fools who would doubt my abilities just because I'm a child, huh? That's fine! I'm far too mature to care about your opinions anyway. You said you wanted this landmark stone, yes? We'll have a new headmaster soon, so I don't mind. But I can't give it to an outsider. Come back when you've earned credits in Classics, Magic, and Chemistry.


Uh...okay. So our new objective is to pass college...high school...er, whatever this is. This seems like it ought to take much longer than just waiting out whatever meeting Verus is in, but I guess it couldn't hurt to try it out.





Magic is the most conventional one to get. Remember that teacher who gives tests where she makes students who guess wrong disappear? We have to pass her exam.





There are eight questions. Some of them are very easy and you'll know the answer if you've been paying any attention to the plot or to the lectures we had to sit through in the last update. Hell, I don't even have to see the whole question to know what the correct answer is here.







Others require you to have spoken to some of the students. Or guess correctly.





Nothing to it!





Oh, be quiet! Class is self-guided study! Always! What?! You want a Chemistry credit? Just because you want one, doesn't mean I can just...I mean, I have my position to think of...Of course! If you bring me some rotten food, I'll give you credit.





Huh? Are you serious? You're the first person to ever ask for rotten food, buddy. Sure, I don't mind. I'll give you more than you could possibly...don't tell me you plan on eating this stuff?







I wish passing chem was this easy in real life.





And then there's this guy.

In case you haven't made the connection thanks to the nice red font, he will now mention that he has a brother at the port who sells Komo Mai Cookies – the same man who wanted us to bring him ten more *traditional* Komo Mai Cookies. I guess it's time to go do that sidequest.







So I'm loaded up with eleven traditional Komo Mai Cookies. I'm glad I had enough room for them. Actually, having eleven free magnus is just about perfect for this not-actually-a-sidequest.





Of course, if we try to move towards the exit of town, these dipshits will stop us because we're carrying pro-Lefty cookies. Since just walking past anyway is out of the question, as is calling the guard or otherwise removing them, we're going to have to play by their stupid rules.





So, first I have to get rid of all the cookies I just got so I can get past.





On the other side, just at the edge of the city, there are people passing out *original* Komo Mai Cookies. Let's stock up on some of these.





Six will do just perfectly.





Now, we cross back to where the guys passing out traditional cookies are and fill our remaining five slots with those.





Since we have more original, pro-Righty cookies than traditional pro-Lefty cookies, the Righty fans will let us pass and leave the area.





First trip.





Second trip.





He hands this over as a reward. I wonder if I can write in a new candidate? We should elect the Magic Teacher and have her banish Lefty and Righty to the Holoholo Jungle.





I'm thinking I'll use the earnings to go on a nice vacation. Take a trip, see the world! Blue skies, white clouds, sun shining. Beautiful women everywhere...just thinking about it makes me smile!





We'll need three of these, so let's draw them while we're here. Now to give them to the professor...













As much as I hate the cookie juggling, I get a nice warm feeling for helping this guy out and seeing his class take off. I guess I'm just sentimental that way.





Well, that's all of them! That was a bit tedious but much easier than it could have been. Let's go get that stone.





Head Teacher: gods...Goodness! You've managed to acquire all three credits? I was mostly joking...What a surprise. Very well, a promise is a promise. You may have this landmark stone. Until the next headmaster is elected, this is the last one in existence. Take good care of it.


Phew! Now we can finally get through the jungle! Let's get to it, then.





...and watch as Sagi gets bowled over by a jungle jerk.





Are you all right? Holoholo koa monkeys are natural pranksters. You have to watch your back.

It's OK, I'm fine. But the little sneak scared me right out of my skin...Huh?...Uh-oh...

What is it, Sagi?

That little...The landmark stone – it's gone.

What do you mean, “gone”! What are we supposed to do?

Well, um...I guess we'll have to go back to the School of Magic and get another one.

But...wasn't ours the last one?

As a matter of fact, it was...

Great. We'll just have to hunt down that koa monkey, then. We have to get that stone back no matter what.





So the developers decided that this jungle wasn't frustrating enough already and threw in pixel hunting for good measure. Actually, I'm not even sure the monkey is visible at all the first time – I just mashed A until I finally happened to be in the right spot.





We have to find it six or seven times. Fortunately, it gets a great deal easier to see after the first couple, so it's mostly just running back and forth across the screen and trying to remember where the path is and where the walls are.





Don't worry, though. We're just about done with the parts of Anuenue I don't like, so my bitching should wind down quite a bit after this update. Time to get to Opu and get Anuenue on the road to redemption!





Video: Huggles

Music: Cornucopian Village


Let's ask the villagers. With workmanship like hers, she's probably a local celebrity.

Villager: Oh, you're here to see Lolo, you say?

Yes, that's right. Do you know where her house is, sir?

Villager; I sure do. It's the first house after you cross this here bridge. But don't you go tying her up. We need her focusing on the waterwheel.


The villager (slowly) walks offscreen.


What was that about?

Beats me. But we know where she lives now. Let's go see her.





Oh! Be right there!





Waterwheel? What are you talking about?

Huh? You mean you're not here to hound me about that?


Fade out/in


Whew, you had me scared. They were just here about the waterwheel yesterday, so I was wondering what was up. So...you want help repairing your airship, correct?

It's an Empire ship. It uses machina – do you think you could fix it?

Machina, huh...Hmm...I've seen machina once before...But I mostly work with wood. It's all I know how to handle – I don't think I could do much with machina.

Oh...that's too bad.

Well, you see, it's a problem with durability. Wood parts just don't hold up as well as machina parts.

This was a waste of time. Sagi, shall we head back. It's better to wait for Verus to return.


I just wanted to point out an odd little error. Since we never asked for Verus' help (as the thread voted to skip directly to asking Corellia), we don't actually know that Verus is out of the office. Guillo will also later reference a line Milly said that she never said for that same reason. I haven't noticed any slip-ups like this, so it's kind of odd to find this one.


Oh! What about the Celestial Tree?...No, no, if it were that simple I wouldn't be pulling my hair out over this dumb waterwheel. Nuts.

Celestial Tree? You mean that great big braidtree that blossoms once every thirty years, right?

That's the one. The Celestial Tree could be used to make parts just as sturdy as the machina kind. But there's no way Queen Corellia would give us permission to use the tree for parts. So, unfortunately, I don't think I can be much help after all. I'm sorry!

What if we got you wood from the celestial Tree?

Whoa...you could do that?

Yeah, we'll try to work something out. It would help you with the waterwheel, too, wouldn't it?

How did you know...?

We heard the villagers talking about it. They really want their waterwheel.

Yeah. They want something that they can make into a symbol of the village. But ordinary wood just isn't cutting it. I keep falling short, and I'm way past my deadline. I don't know what to do...

Don't worry, we'll find some way to gather materials from the Celestial Tree. That's all it would take, right?

You mean it? Oh, thank you!





Tackle-hug!


*twitch*

Wh-What the devil?! Release him, wench!



A-Anyway...I'll get wood. ...Uh, at the tree! Tree wood! Then we'll bring it back and you can fix the Sfida, OK?

You bet!






Wild promises? But we might be able to fix the Sfida if we get wood form the Celestial Tree!

We should have just waited for Quaestor Verus to call. Instead, you...you...you let HER wear the pants!

Wear the...what...?

Milliarde – that's the complete opposite of what you told us before. I believe you said there's “no stinking way” you would wait around for Verus.

I-I just meant I didn't want to wait in the jungle. I never said anything about waiting in general! I know! Let's go back to Komo Mai. We could wait there, over tea.

Nope, sorry. I made a promise to Lolo. Let's head for the Celestial Tree.

My, aren't we a trooper all of a sudden? All right, I see how it is. Your wish is my command.


Milly turns, starts to walk, then turns back...





Then she proceeds to stomp offscreen. And I mean stomp. She has a unique animation for it and her every footstep makes a crunching sound. It's hilariously exaggerated.


What was that for? What did I do?

Who knows?


Guillo saunters off after her.


W-Wait up, you two!





I get the feeling this olifant wants Holoholo fruit. I might go get it one, but getting the mandatory one was enough of a pain that I'm not going to rush right out to do it again.





I don't much care one way or another, or I could live by myself, too.



I don't see a way to split our assets.

You're right. Let's rent this house out and both get half of the money that comes in. And I'll take our child. Do we have an agreement?

What?! I'm raising that kid! You don't even have a job! What can you possibly do for him?!

It's not like you're rolling in money either, you know!! And you're paying child support!



I can find work on my own, and support myself from here on. Please, that's enough. Mom, Dad, thank you both. And goodbye.





I -

I just -

holy shit you guys

















Okay, let's just...oh my GOD...let's just move on. Seriously, though, if anyone knows if there's a sidequest attached to this or anything about what the christ just happened please let me know via PM or spoiler tags or something because that was seriously disturbing and I want to resolve it okay








Yes, excuse me – is there any way you could spare some wood from the Celestial Tree?

Man: Spare some wood? Are you joking?

We'd just like you to cut off a few branches for us. Please?

Woman: Don't be absurd! There's no way we could take a blade to the Celestial Tree!

See? I told you so. Don't look at me.





This woman is named Yulfee. As I recall, this is the only scene she's in so I can't be bothered to make a portrait for her. I don't even know why she exists in the first place besides to be a throwaway reference to Mayfee (she's presumably Mayfee's mom or grandma).


Woman: Yulfee! You have to hear this. These people are telling us to slice off part of the Celestial Tree!

Yulfee: I said keep it down. I don't know the circumstances, but regardless, taking a blade to the Celestial Tree is out of the question. I'm sorry for your trouble, but you'll have to leave.

There's no way, then? We really need that wood.

Woman: You heard her! No means no!

Yulfee: If you need a piece of the Celestial Tree that badly...there are ways. Every year she sheds some of her branches. That's how she cares for herself – shedding the older branches ensures no nutrients go to waste. If the fell-branches would suffice, you could try asking Queen Corellia, to start with.

Woman: Yulfee! The fell-branches are still sacred wood containing the power of the Celestial Tree! We can't just give them away to strangers!

Yulfee: I know, but...

It's all right, I understand. We'll speak with the queen.

Yulfee: I'm sorry I couldn't be of any help.

No, it was kind of you to tell us about the branches. Thank you so much.

Yulfee: You're welcome. May the Celestial Tree's blessings be with you.


Aww man, I thought we were finally done with Komo Mai for a while...





Music: Yep, it's Temple of Celestial Flowers again!


Wow, that's a lot of knights. I didn't even know Anuenue had this many soldiers.


What was that about? They sure seemed to be in a hurry.

It looks like they came from the palace.





Well, then...it looks like drama might finally be cooking in Anuenue!



-


Decision Time!


There are bad guys!

> I know!

> There are?


Let's be heroic!

> Okay!

> But what about self-preservation?


It's a huge pit!


> Jump across!

> There's no hope.