Part 781: Let's Read: Main Event - Part 23

Let’s Read: Main Event (part 23)



Chapter 23
Houston, Borghese
12 June 3055 (really)

Days elapsed since book start: 306¼
Mercenaries recruited since book start: 6
Mercenaries recruited off-screen: 1
Things accomplished since book start: 1 (Rose took a nap, Rose got a Charger)
Protagonists introduced since book start: 7
Protagonists mentioned but not yet introduced: 1
Antagonists introduced since book start: 3
Antagonists defeated since book start: 0
Chapters spent on Northwind: 5
Chapters spent on Solaris: 10
Chapters spent on Outreach: 4
Chapters spent on Borghese: 13



So yeah. 163 days have passed since I last dropped any mad spoilers; and not even the Author cares to write about any of it. I hope y’all are ready for more politics, because we won’t be getting a fight for at least another chapter. Rose then obsesses some about how amazing his sister is and how she’s already interfacing extremely well with the local planetary militia even though they’re all older than she is and—

No. I’m sorry, I can’t take Rianna seriously. She’s goddamned terrible at everything she does, and exists entirely so Jeremiah will have someone to rescue (who isn’t McCloud) and to martyr herself for her brother. I wish I was kidding. Incidentally, they’re pretty much training the local infantry how not to get stepped on by `Mechs.

We then learn that the other member of Jeremiah Rose’s extended family, Angus Rose, is quiet and yet somehow has ‘amazing command potential.’ Since Jeremiah (and most of the Inner Sphere, to be fair) believe highly in nepotism, this instantly becomes truth. It’s a good thing Angus survives this to become the heart and soul of the Black Thorhahahahahaha.

We then learn that


… Again, why would anyone care? I certainly don’t, and by now I’m supposed to have an emotional investment in Jeremiah Rose.

Anyway, we then learn that Hawg (who is awesome) can’t actually teach anyone how to be as awesome as he is, so Jeremiah’s been riding in the scout VTOL with him. He then learns what I’ve been saying all along: that Hawg is fucking awesome and the second best character. He’s no Badicus O’Shea, of course, but his 2.1 dimensions is a step above the 1.7 D everyone else is trying to pretend makes them a ‘fleshed out character.’

Oh, also, we find out that Hauptmann Salander Morgain has been fucking Rianna, but we are then told that Rose doesn’t know. The implication being, if Rose knew, he’d kill Morgain.

Rose then admits the only reason he’s popular is because of Rachel McCloud, who is actually not socially inept and usually prevents him from doing anything too retarded (probably because he follows her around drooling like a retarded puppy). Rose then decides to try to take his VTOL to do more scouting (since Information is Ammunition (but that’s someone else’s motto, whoops)). Time to go turn some unturned stones, Jeremiah. Maybe you’ll find something original under one of them.

Except he can’t. Hawg is sick with viral pneumonia, which is the author’s first attempt to kill off one of the only two interesting characters on the team. We’re then introduced to a new character: Alexander Graham Antioch Bell. He pilots the VTOL for Jeremiah so Rose can still do his scouting and leave Hawg in the hospital to be forgotten recover.

Alexander Graham Bell introduces himself, says that Morgain sent him to spy help out, and he then nearly blows Rianna’s cover. Fortunately, Rose is dense as concrete on Jupiter and doesn’t realize what’s going on. We then learn that Antioch served seven years with the 26th Lyran Guard (“Steiner’s Boots”) who’s only notable action was almost not getting their asses kicked in by Natasha Kerensky in the Clan Invasion.

The three spend three weeks puttering around in a VTOL together and become Great Friends ™. Nothing will come of this, I promise.

Rose finishes his recon just in time for PLOT to occur. Two of Cooke’s supporters have just been arrested or killed, leaving Crenshaw with a clear majority in the Space Senate. He has declared himself Emperor, and dissolved the Republic. It’s up to Jeremiah Rose and his plucky Jedi Knights to stop him before he builds another Death Star!

… Wait.

This next bit makes my head hurt, one sec.

Wait, hold on.

I need to copy this verbatim, just hold on.












… HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

Rose then puts the base on ‘Yellow Alert’ (… really? Shields up, weapons offline? Bad form, Rose. That just attracts Klingons). Rose then immediately abandons his command to go warn McCloud that the situation is now proper fucked.

At least he’s loyal to something. Pity it’s not his troopers. Chapter over.