The Let's Play Archive

Blaster Master

by ElMaligno

Part 8: My tank can climb walls.

Chapter 7: My tank can climb walls.

: I really don't want to do something like that EVER again...
: This is the first and last time you will do anything of this nature in this game. Also look at my fucking health bar! Thank God for saves states.

: *boat noises*
: *submarine noises*
: Yeah this fun..

: *boat noises*
: *submarine noises*
: But remember when I told you this was the most annoying and hardest part of the game?

: Its still not over.
: Jesus fucking Christ, Can't you just aim up?!?
: And loose my sleek submarine shape? NEVER!

: Oh look an alternate way! I bet it will be short and easy!
: Suffering builds character, you know!

: So... Where are we going now?
: Area 6.

: And... What's in Area 6?
: Not telling, it will ruing the surprise!

: Awww come on don't be a spoilsport!

: Spill the fucking goods already!
: You will like it!

: Promise?
: Is Ice cold?

: Its sad to say that this particular door is HARDER than the boss door.

: Uhhhh.... Yeah?
: A promise it is!

: Pat yourself in the back! You have just finished one of the most annoying sections of the game.

: This is a fucking stupid thing to do.

: Going to the top right of the level.

: Into the portal...

: Welcome to hell.

: A mother fucking ICE level.
: Heh.
: ?

: That was a cool joke.
: So... No hard feelings?

: Well... Revenge is a dish best served cold.
: Ha!

: Then again I might give you the cold shoulder.

: Wopitydooo even the floors inside are cold.

: Maybe I should act more cold and distant...

: You know what the worst that could happen here?
: What?

: If I caught a cold.

: Then again I hope you don't get cold-feet in the middle of the level.
: You know I get it, that's enough.

: Girl, why don't you get a cold shower and chill out?

: Hay are you listening?


: You can stop yourself from sliding by pausing an then unpausing the game.
: Will you stop it?
: What? I'm I making your oil run cold?

: *groan*
: Nah, don't worry I'm cool.

: Your artificial tears are leaving me cold.

: Where is your machine god now? EH?
: In mars... Probably sleeping.

: So will you stop?
: I have stopped cold on my tracks.

: And I ran out of material too.
: Thank the VoidDragon!

: What was that?
: Eh nothing.

: Pausing and unpausing the game makes the block reappear. Useful, but situational.

: We are close.
: What made you say that? The gigantic tower of ice?

: Just shut up and get inside.

: Lovely, teleporting mutants, ice and spikes...

: and lots...

: and lots of spikes.

: You don't want to know how many times I had to reload to make it unscathed.

: Dead diary... Jackpot!

: Hmmm... should I take the path with a lot of ice or the regular one?


: I hope the boss is in there.


: I don't like crabby things.

: This dude is rather annoying. He has a longer reach than the Area 2 boss, plus he attacks faster too. An all around bitch to kill.

: Good thing the grenade glitch works on him.

: Why me no die?
: Suffering builds character?

: What am do to get dis?
: You are an abortion amongst abortions to nature...

: Me am getting betta.

: Well, my game glitches every time I killed him. One time he was exploding, still alive AND attacking!
: ME KICK YAAAAAaaaarghhhhh
: Phew.

: Can we go somewhere warmer? I think I'm getting the cold....

Next time LP! Blaster Master: My tank can stick to ceilings.

P.S. It's a good thing there are two/three updates to go. I'm running out of material.