Chapter 1: 1000 A.D.
Watch the defeat of the Dragon Tank at the hands of a couple of kids. / Backup
Oh shit, it's the fuzz!
Toad can take his potential shit and cram it.
Try not putting your hands behind your back?
Chrono Trigger promotes sacrificing others for personal gain.
As we cascade down the steps...
Treasure chests! These are safe for opening, as the castle in the past doesn't have a dungeon, and there's no castle in the future.
At the bottom of the steps...
_____ employs his scary face, but to no avail, the guards attempt to recapture him.
_____ and Velma take a casual stroll towards the front door, pushing limp-wristed guards out of the way...
There was only one exit! How did you get in front of me?!
Velma can come, too.
These guys have intelligence on par with Goombas (reusing old jokes).
Rather than flee off to the rest of the world, you're cordoned off to the right fork.
Once again, the party strolls leisurely on, unimpeded by the guards and their sissypants training.
_____ is pondering just how the FUCK he got wrapped up in this bullshit.
DO YOU NOT THINK THINGS THROUGH
I know, Velma. So is the antenna on your head. Radios don't exist, stupid.
Still, despite all evidence pointing towards what a terrible idea this is, the party rushes in.
"Bye, logic! *wave*"
*heavy bass drum*
"I don't say this enough, but fuck you, Velma."