Part 14: Episode XIII: Sweet Home (Hamilton Residence Revisited)
Episode XIII: Sweet Home (Hamilton Residence Revisited)
When last we left our heroine, she'd seen the ghost of her mother. Who, even in death, leaves behind fetch quests. With that said, let's continue...
I don't know about you guys, but I'm beside myself with anticipation in having to run half way across this place. Especially, with absolutely no enemies, danger, or hell...anything interesting to speak of, other than a single generic ghost.
In the interval since our last teleport/time travel expedition, it has since gotten dark outside and a new grating thumping 'scary' music theme has been added to the mansion. I blame Dennis.
Alyssa returns to Dick's room. It is an uneventful journey.
Just when I thought things couldn't get any more exciting.
Book of Entities II
Ah, so we have a half-baked explanation as to why Alyssa gets her magical bow and arrow. It still doesn't explain why the half dozen generic souls we've released do jack shit to call out magical powers and only the plot specific specters seems to be able to do the trick. Or why some ghosts are poorly textured transparent messes, some still have their heads caved in and drip blood everywhere, and some just have sort of bleeding eyes and poor vision.
Oh well, no time to ponder that. Here's a man-baby mask!
Now, what on earth are we going to do with that?
Couldn't they have just unlocked with that drawer opening? Did I really have to muck around with the inventory on a wall two feet away?
Alyssa discovers her grandfather's study's secret...study. Also, a rather ornamental large box of which I'm hoping is the Ark of the Covenant, causing Alyssa and Dennis' faces to melt off and/or heads explode, ending the game on a high note and letting me return to Mass Effect.
Well, at least we've found the sentimental item for Curly back in the Ghost Town. Sure, it doesn't make any sense why a ghost in the 1960's would have its precious item in a low rent inn's study. But, has anything else in the game mad much sense up to this point?
Alyssa finds another, far more menacing plague at the bottom of the box: a monologue.
2nd February, 1978
"I even brought up the fact we'd have to be cousins if the 'Rooder' power only manifested in females yet my family name was somehow of a long line of the clan, despite it manifesting in my wife."
"I found it in a thrift store for $13.50. I found the price a bit steep and the logic behind its discovery flaky. But, it's more of an explanation then anyone is willing to provide as to how I stumbled upon some sort of published text chronicling an ancient line of teenage ghost crime fighters."
13th August, 1984
"The Rooder bloodline also seemed to have given the Rooders the power to convince all their spouses to allow them to keep their family name or else take it on themselves."
25th April, 1988
"How I can detect a strong will and wisdom in an infant is lost to me. But, you'll need to take my word on it."
"So I am a Rooder...it's in my blood. That's like a minority or something, right? I wonder if I can get tax breaks and financial aid at a university."
Alyssa gets up and walks over to her grandfather's painting.
"I have the same Rooder strain in my blood as my mother. I'll make sure the family's Original Recipe is honored!"
"Granted, at no point has Dorothy actually been named. I'm saving her anyway! Then and only then will I be able to leave this nightmare and see my mum again. Even if she was sort of a ghost before..."
No, moron. The right way would be to go out the front door. Alert the authorities. Do not go back in time through the occult portal in your mother's room.
"What?! I thought I heard something..."
"Huh. Nothing. Must have been my imagination. Oh well, back to the portal!"
Another trot through gloomy, unthreatening, already covered landscape.
"I found this forty years in the future in a hidden room of a study that's likely been locked shut for the last three years. I hope it happens to be yours."
"Meh, close enough. Nyuk-nyuk-nyuk."
Curly Howard leaves behind a pair of files in his wake. Woop-woop-woop!
...It's one of the great mysteries of our time.
Why, it is! It's one with the extremely obvious ajar picture frame that you didn't bother moving. Guess what you should probably go do now, kiddo.
Very fucking good! Twenty minutes of backtracking, four files, one fully narrated at that... All could have been avoided if Alyssa just looked under the fucking picture frame here...
I hate this game...
Tune in next time for:
MORE TOUCHING FAMILY MOMENTS!
Not to be featured:
A clock tower.
Dick Hamilton's Narrated File