The Let's Play Archive

Discworld Noir

by Bacter

Part 2: Lewton met a Lady

Funny you should ask!

Chapter up!

When we last left our protagonist, he was darkly monologuing about Ankh-Morpork and trust, and how there isn't any of the one in the other, as a mysterious figure approached his door.

So, let's begin Act 1!

(Note: I'm including a link to the voice acting from the first conversation these two have - I'll try to include a voice clip from the first interaction between any two characters, and one if any lines are particularly funny/good with voice acting. I'm also going to transcribe all the conversations, but I would highly recommend listening to them - the voice acting is REALLY top notch!)

Lewton and Customer

- Mr. Lewton?

- If I'm not, I should fire the guy who painted the door.

- So, this is what a private investigator looks like.
I expected someone more heroic.

- Heroism costs extra. What can I do for you, Ms...

- Mrs., actually, and the name is Carlotta.

- Ok, Mrs. Actually. Carlotta it is.
What's a girl like you doing out in a night like this?

- I want to hire you, Mr. Lewton.

- Please, call me Lewton. Mr. sounds so formal.

- How much do you charge for a simple investigation?

- I don't know. I've never had a "simple" investigation.
A tricky one is 20 a day.

- I'll give you 200 in advance, plus expenses.

- For 200, I guess I should treat you with some respect.

- Oh, I wouldn't ask a guy like you to attempt the impossible.

- What's the case?

- I want you to find a man named "Mundy".

- Why do you want to find Mundy?

- Do you know him?

- No. And this case will go a lot faster if you let ME ask the questions.

- You like to be in control, don't you Lewton?

- If you don't pull the strings, then you're the puppet.
Tell me about you and Mundy.

- I've been a lonely woman, Lewton.

- You amaze me.

- You'd be surprised.

- Shocked maybe, but not surprised.

- Mundy is my lover, Lewton. Or used to be.
He's been away for a while, over in Tsort.
He came back to Ankh-Morpork a couple days ago, on the Milka. But he didn't come to see me.
I think he may be having an affair. You're wondering whether my husband knows about it.

- Actually, I was wondering when you were going to give me the money.

- My husband passed away several years ago.

- I hope the poor guy was smiling at the time.

- Is there anything you can tell me about Mundy that might help me find him?

- He's got blue eyes, brown hair, and a black heart. You'd like him.

- Has he got any friends in Ankh-Morpork?

- Does anyone?

- How tall is he?

- I don't know, I don't picture him standing up.

- What was Mundy's business in Tsort?

- I don't know. I never asked about his work, and he never told me.

- Must be a very straightforward relationship.

- As simple as they come.

- Where can I find the ship he came in on?

- Down at the wharf.

- Have you been there yourself?

- I avoid places like that. Women and seam- - Uh, forget I asked.

- This is a bad neighborhood for you to come into alone, Carlotta.

- I can take care of myself.

- I believe you.

- Good, trust is important.

- I said I believed you, I never said I trusted you.

- Don't you like me, Lewton?

- I like a lot of things. I like dogs, but I wouldn't trust one not to bite me.

- I won't bite.

- Shame. I haven't been bitten in a long while.
I'd better get started on your case. Where can I contact you?

- I'll be in touch. Be seeing you, Lewton.

- I hoped I would see her again. Because she still hadn't paid me.
Still, it wasn't every day that a beautiful woman offered me a case.
Frankly, it wasn't often that anyone offered me a case.
And 200 would certainly help pay the rent. If I had anything left over from my bar bill.
(Note: Blue Lewton - Blueton - shows up when Lewton is narrating instead of speaking out loud)

And without another word, Carlotta turns face and walks calmly out of our office.

I want to take a second and really appreciate that first dialogue - it establishes Lewton as intelligent, a banterer, quite untrusting, and there's an edge of mockery to everything he says.

Carlotta, on the other hand, is established as somebody more than capable of holding her own - she got Lewton on the case without actually giving anything up. She's attractive but doesn't rely on simple seduction to get what she wants, and it should be patently obvious that she knows more than she's telling.

THIS is how you start a mystery.



Now's as good a time as any to explain the clues/map.

Lewton carries a notebook to keep track of his case notes.

Whenever we see that notepad icon, it means a new clue is inserted in the notebook.

The notebook serves a few purposes in the case. We get all our questions to ask characters from the notebook. Additionally, if we want to "help" Lewton make a logical connection, sometimes we select an item from the notebook, which changes our cursor, then apply it like an item to a person or item in the game.

One of the very few criticisms I have about the game is that we don't actually have to do that for a GOOD long time, and by the time it was necessary, I'd forgotten that you could do it, so I had to gamefaqs my way out of a particular situation.

Additionally, left-clicking each item means Lewton gives a short summary of why the clue is important and where you learned it. This is SUPER helpful for refreshing yourself on what all the plot threads are, and what needs to be done.

I'll give his description of each clue when we get it.

Additionally, the first few pages of the tablet provide quick access to different parts of the notepad, which is helpful, because this notepad is going to get FULL by the end. It's also quite nice that when a thread or clue is resolved, Lewton will cross it out.

Clues so far:

Mundy - Carlotta had hired me to track down Mundy. At the beginning, that was pretty much all I knew about him.

Milka - The Milka was the tramp schooner that Mundy had come in on, and I knew that it was berthed at the wharf.

Carlotta - Beautiful, seductive, and dangerous. Carlotta was worth a stare. She was trouble.

The map is simple enough - we use it to get around. I'll show it off when we're ready to leave.

So - we've got a case!

Onto in-game items!

Every item can either be interacted with (which usually means picked up) or examined.

"Unfortunately, I can't afford sapient pearwood. This is just regular wood. Still, it's a pretty good desk."

I won't waste a screenshot on every item description, though, usually I'll just put them in quotes. For example:

"I'd purchased the imp-powered coffee-bean machine from Cut-Me-Own-Throat dibbler, the man who's name was the by-word for quality. With CMOT Dibbler, you could say "bye" to quality. I'll say this for the ICBM, it made coffee strong enough to blow your head off. On the downside, the imp tended to use most of the beans to fuel its own addiction. Some days the poor thing was so jittery the coffee-bean machine would vibrate off the shelf."

"I had purchased a large, indexed scroll rack to keep track of all the cases I was going to handle. The Mundy case made it two."

I was going to talk about that earlier - Lewton talked about things being unusual, and how cases usually go. He's been a detective for a MONTH now. I guess you pick up the business quickly!

As far as inventory goes, we've got a purse

And that's about it. It's got a few coins in it, and functions as the "some money" item famous in adventure games.

There being nothing else to do here, let's head to the docks!

This is the city of Ankh-Morpork. You can almost smell the crime and excitement. And you can ABSOLUTELY smell the river

Locations will light up as they become accessible, but for now that's just the docks. Let's head there.

- The wharf was on the upmarket side of the river, on the city of Ankh.
The Morpork docks on the other side of the river were not a place wise travelers disembarked at. But then again, wise travelers tried to avoid Ankh-Morpork altogether.
But if you travelled a lot, it was hard to miss. Like malaria.

I know it's dark, and a bit hard to see, but things to examine here:

Mr. Scoplett, a name that perhaps doesn't inspire much confidence...

A sub-area (arrows mean exits, either between whole locations or screens within a location)

And some bollards.

- "Along the length of the wharf were hundreds of posts for mooring ships too. It seemed like a lot of bollards to me. "


Well, let's try the sub-area first.

There's a sailor, some crates, and one crate in particular (a good sign it'll be important later!)

Trying to interact with the sailor gets you

- "The sailor was busy loading the ship, and I decided not to disturb him."

And he won't let us look at the crates, so Mr. Scoplett it is, I guess!


(Please listen to this one - it's so great)

- Are you the first mate?


- Ugh... Let's start again. Are you the first mate?


- You're not going to get any money off of me, so you can drop the fake accent.

- Sorry. You know how it is. Some people are stupid enough to fall for that sort of thing. What can I do for you?

So, welcome to the first true dialogue screen!

We can reference to our notebook or inventory (top right), we can generically Talk (mouth icon), or we can leave (hand icon)


- When do you sail?

- As soon as we've got her loaded.

- How much is passage?

- Where you lookin' to go?

- I don't know. Tsort, perhaps.

- We just come from there. It'll be a long time before we get back there again.

- Did you bring any passengers?

- Sure! We always try to take a couple of passengers. They pay their way, and if there's a big storm, they're very useful to sacrifice to the angry sea gods. O'course, we tell people they were washed over the side.

Now we have a few more subjects to talk about. Most of the important dialogue comes from inventory items or clue dialogue, but sometimes just regular talk uncovers something useful, and sometimes presenting people with a number of clues opens up more dialogue options here.

The Milka's Passengers

- What were the passengers on the last voyage like?

- There were three of them. One of them seemed alright, but the other two... I don't know, there were something strange about them.

NEW CLUE: Mysterious Passengers


- Do you sacrifice passengers often?

- No. The captain doesn't like it, he says it's bad for business.
I said that we WERE advertising ourselves as offering an "exciting tour of the circle sea", but he pointed out that most people would expect the tour to be ABOVE the water.
If I'd had my way, we would have thrown some people off the last voyage.

- Bad omens?

- The whole crew had a bad feeling of dread from the moment we set off.

- Looking at the state of the ship, that doesn't come as a surprise.

With our regular dialogue options exhausted, we turn to the notebook.

NOTE: I will (obviously) only be posting interesting responses. Most dialogue options mean nothing to most characters -
and you don't need to read fifty "IUNNO"s for every character.

Mysterious Passengers

- What was strange about these passengers?

- I dunno. One of them seemed kind of - foreign. I mean more foreign than most.


- This is the Milka, isn't it?

- That's what it says on the prow.

- It's impossible to read anything written on that hull!

- Just because you can't read it, doesn't mean it isn't there. Reality is subjective, after all.

- Don't get all existential with me.

- It was more ontological than existential.

- That's a really bad habit you've got there.

- Wha- oh. Sorry.
I picked up a bad case of philosophy in Ephebe a couple years ago, and I haven't been able to get rid of it since.
Just can't seem to shake it off.
Normal as anything one minute, next moment I'm wondering if anything can truly be said to "exist".
Bit of a drawback when you're supposed to be navigating.

- OK - assuming the existence of an objective, shared universe, is this the Milka?

- Yes.

- Can I have a look on board?

- No.

- That better not be some kind of philosophical objection.

- No one gets on board, without Captain Jenkins' persmission.

- Where is the captain?

- I dunno. But you COULD try the cafe Ankh. He usually goes there when he's in Ankh-Morpork.
If it exists, of course.

Author's note: Little touches, like the unfortunately philosophical first mate, really spice up this game - this guy could easily have been just a gruff mug, but now he's a MEMORABLE gruff mug.


- Was there a man named Mundy on the last voyage?

- It's funny you should ask that, you're the second person today to have an interest in Mundy.

- Who was the first?

- A dwarf. He didn't give his name.
I don't think he was from 'round here, though.

- What about Mundy? What was he like?

- I don't pry into the passengers business.
But for a man who came on board pretty happy, he seemed pretty unsettled when he left.
Not that I blame him, something was definitely amiss on this last voyage.

- Do you know where he is now?

- Mundy?
No. Like I said, I don't pry into the passengers business.

- Unless you actually look through their luggage after they've been washed over the side.

- Hey!
What are you inferring?

- I'm not inferring anything.
I'm implying that you might have had a look at their luggage at one point.

- If I had I certainly wouldn't admit it to you.

- Which either means you didn't look, or you didn't find anything of interest.

- You'd better watch your step, son.
It's not good to make accusations like that.

- Don't worry.
Anything you say is strictly between you, me, and anyone else I decide to tell.

NEW CLUE: Inquisitive Stranger

Well, that was a shockingly fruitful conversation! We got two new clues, and the distinct sense that Mundy's voyage over here wasn't a simple transport. It sure has the sailors spooked - they just want to load up their ship and get out of town.

Let's review the new clues:

Inquisitive Stranger
The first made said that there was a dwarf had been asking questions about Mundy before I had. That raised my suspicions that there was more going on than Carlotta was telling me.

Mysterious Passengers
The first mate hadn't been able to tell me much about the other passengers on the Milka, but he did note that there was something distinctly foreign about one of them.

Combine inquisitive stranger with Milka:

- He were asking after Mundy, but how did they know he was on the Milka?

Well, after that conversation, a new location's opened up, and one that's intimately familiar to Lewton, as it turns out. Let's go see the Cafe Ankh!

Smoky saxophone jazz and a rainy night lit by neon lights. What could be finer?

Not spending that night in Ankh-Morpork, for one. But we haven't any choice. We've just got a case.

Before we go in, let's check under the archway to the right.

A cart, a trapdoor, and...

- "The golem was loading wine barrels onto the cart calmly and diligently. I would have pitied it, but there didn't seem much point. It was just magically animated clay."

Lewton really needs to talk to the Golem Trust. After the events of some of the more recent books, the average Ankh-Morporkian might have a slightly more nuanced version of the personhood of Golems (though maybe not), but it's possible that Lewton is either conservative as regards Golems, or simply unaware of developments. More on that in a second.

Wordlessly (not surprising - I didn't see a mouth on that Golem, and they aren't much for idle chitchat) it returns to the basement.

We march forward and do what adventure game heroes do best -

Liberate stuff.

- I figured the golem wouldn't notice that the crowbar had gone missing. Not that I'm saying it didn't need it, I just figured I'd get away with stealing it.

You're a cold man, Lewton. As an aside, a golem almost certainly doesn't need a crowbar. They're tremendously strong, and anything that they couldn't accomplish with their hands certainly would also bend a crowbar. This crowbar is more likely for humans to open the wine casks with, when they get where they're going.

Speaking of, where ARE they going?

That seems promising! So we know some of the cargo from the Milka is headed to the Patrician's palace (for non-discworlders - that's the ruler of Ankh-Morpork).

You can use the crowbar on the trapdoor (I certainly did), but you just get

- "I knew full well that I wouldn't be able to get down there without permission and the key."

And examining the trapdoor

- "I guess I never noticed that the care Ankh had a wine cellar before.
Perhaps if they ran out of drinks at the bar I'd have been more inclined to investigate."

Huh. Well, in we go.

Samael's Song

We're greeted by some beautiful piano music, at the hands of a slick-looking vampire. And we aren't happy about it.

- You can't recall
If the whiskey knocked you flat
Or if everything was a blur
When you met her
All that you remember
Are the tunes of a vampire
A melancholy tune
About impending doom
I'll fetch your tankard
Fill it to the brim
A cask of stale
Broken drum ale
Wondering how long 'till you me-et again
On the bank of the Ankh
Too much to drink
You could barely even think
Too muuuuch -

- I thought I told you never to play that song again.

- Oh. Sorry Mr. Lewton. It's just, I wasn't expecting you to call by tonight and...

- You weren't expecting me? It's only been 8 years, Samael.

- I guess my memory ain't what it used to be.

- I don't know why Samael put up with my temper. He could have broken every bone in my body if he wanted to.
But that's what made him special, I guess, that he'd take almost any kind of abuse from the clientele, and he'd still be there at the piano, playing better than anyone else in Ankh-Morpork.

This is Samael - an old, old friend of ours, and a heck of a vampire. This sort of establishes Lewton as a free-thinking individual, opinions about golems aside. And frankly, if you've never heard a free golem speak, it'd be easy to mistake them for machinery.

Lots of people feel uneasy around the undead, but Lewton apparently has no such compunctions.

Samael seems like he'd be good for information, but if we try to talk to him...

- I decided not to disturb Samael while he was working.

No dice.

Well, looking around, there are two more things to do here. Well, three I guess.

One - We can go right, to the bar area. But there's really nothing to do here.

Two - Ah! Here's Captain Jenkins!

- "The Captain of the Milka, Captain Jenkins, didn't seem to be a very happy man."

Of course not. He's drinking alone with any free time he has. I think this place is supposed to be kind of a dive, but it looks pretty nice and even a bit swanky to me. Of course, I guess that outs me as a peasant.

Onward, to JENKINS!

You and the Cap'n make it happen

- Are you Captain Jenkins?

- That depends on who's asking.

- Don't play games. I'm just after a few anwers.

- That song really put you in a bad mood, didn't it?

- If you're trying to get me angry, it's working.

- No need to get upset. You need to drink more and think less.

- If I drank any more than I do now, I'd never think again.

- That's the ticket!

No special dialogue options at the moment, so let's go with

General Talk

- So, you're the captain of the Milka.

- Unfortunately.

- Unfortunately?

- Ordinarily, I'd be happy being the captain of a fine ship like the Milka, but after this last voyage I'm thinking of taking up farming.

- Tough journey?

- I don't wanna talk about it.

Some new options now!

Let's ask about

Previous Voyage

- What was so bad about the last voyage?

- I told you, I don't wanna talk about it.

- Sometimes it helps to talk about these things.

- Why would I wanna talk about it?

- Alright, let's put that another way. I wanna talk about it, and the sooner I finish talking to you, the sooner you can get back to drinking.

- By that logic, my best bet would be to just ignore you, and carry on drinking.

- I was never much good at logic. I did home economics in school.

Boarding the Milka

- I was hoping you'd let me have a look around on the Milka.

- I was hoping that I was going to make enough money to buy myself a harem of exotic dancers named Chantel. But it looks like we're both going to be disappointed

Boarding the Milka (2)

- Is there any way I can persuade you to let me on your ship?

- Is there any way I can persuade you to go away?

Mysterious Passengers

- On your last voyage, there were three passengers, right?
Mundy, and two others.

- You tell me, you seem to know more about my ship than I do.

- I just wanna know what you can remember about them.

- I remember we picked them up in Ecalpon, and I know they had a lot of cargo.
Oh, and one was a woman, and one was a man.
I think.

- You THINK he was a man?

- There was something particularly foreign about him.
I'm not sure what.

- Where's Ecalpon?

- Up near the hub.
Gods-forsaken place. All there is to do there is drink and eat fish sandwiches with no tops on.

- Sounds like a long way from the circle sea.

- We got lost, alright?
It's easy to mix up port and starbord when you've drunk too much port.

(mixing up LEFT and RIGHT? That is a LOT of port!)

- Are they still on board?

- Nope. We dropped them in Ankh-Morpork.
And before you ask, I have no idea what they were doing here.
That's not my business.

- I was beginning to realize that Captain Jenkins only had two questions to ask his passengers:
Where are you going, and how much money have you got?


- The Milka looks like a good ship.

- You know nothing about ships, do you.
She looks like exactly what she is. A run-down tramp schooner with no future.

- Any chance I could look around her anyway?

- All I wanna do is get the cargo loaded and get out of this gods-forsaken city.
I don't need people snoopin' around onboard.


- I understand you were carrying a man named Mundy on your ship?

- What's it to you?

- I was hoping to find him.

- Owes you money, does he?

- No, he's an old friend.

- Him? You must think I'm as drunk as I look.

- Aren't you?

- Well, Ok, so maybe I am. What do you want to know?

- Where is he now?

- I've no idea.
We picked him in Tsort a couple of weeks ago and we brought him here.
That's about all I want to know about him.

- Did he say what he was coming to Ankh-Morpork for?

- I think he said he was meeting someone.

- Who?

- I can barely remember me own name, let alone something I overheard through a doorway last week.

Hm. That's all he knows about.

Sort of a dead end, really.

Oh well, time for, regrettably, option 3: Nobby.

A human weasel speaks.

For non-discworlders, Nobby is a member of the watch, and a worse one you'd be hard-pressed to find. Questionably human, unquestionably immoral and petty, and utterly beyond-questionably unhygienic, he manages to be a decent copper under it all. He frequently works with Sgt. Colon, and, apparently, Lewton.

Lewton used to be a member of the watch, which is sort of unexpected!

I really, really like the choice for Nobby's voice actor. It would have been too simple to have it just be a squeaky, weasel-y guy. Having him sound dark and conspiratorial gives some credence to this character, who is actually quite useful in this game.

- "My old friend Nobby from the watch. I hadn't spoken to him in ages."

- Hello Nobby.

- ehh... 'ello Lewton.
em... How've you been keepin?

- I've been worse.
Of course, I've been better too.
And I've been a hell of a lot better, and not much worse.

- That's good... isn't it?

- Don't worry. If commander Vimes sees us together, I'll tell him I made you talk to me.

- *sighs* It's not that I don't like you, Lewton.
I mean we was friends and all, but...
It's just, well...

- It's just that he'd bite your head off if he saw you talking to me.

- He'd go spare.

Lots of options. Let's start with

General Talk

- How you been keeping, Nobby?
How's the rest of the watch?

- Not so bad, Lewton. Been keepin' myself busy.
Been working with Sergeant Colon.

- How is old fatty Colon?

- Still fat.
I'll tell him I saw you.

- No you won't.

- Ok so maybe I won't. I was just bein' trite.


- Uh, yeah, that's the one.

The Old Days

- I guess I never really understood why it was that you didn't get kicked out as well, Nobby.

- Me? I ain't never done nothin' wrong!

- Don't give me that, Nobby.
When you were serving as quartermaster under the duke of Pseudopolis, it was widely known that several items from the stores
were found in your kit.

- That was all above board. I had all the paperwork for 'em.

- Your kit at the time consisted of two warehouses.
I just think Vimes had a grudge against me.

- Lewton, I know your me friend an' all, but uh, you took a BRIBE.

- Are you trying to tell me you never took a bribe?

- Never.

- The ham from Harga's house of Ribs?

- Evidence.

- The pocket clock from the suicide in the Shades?

- I wanted somethign to remember him by.

- The money in the petty cash box!

- Mislaid by someone.

- Misappropriated by you.

- I never Misanthropated anything.

- I just want to understand why it was that you could get away with all your petty theft, and I couldn't get away with one act of weakness.

- Well, ehm.... you see, ehm....

- Just say it Nobby, I'm not going to hold it against you.

- Well I reckon Mr. Vimes...
thinks that a bit of petty theft ain't something to get excited about - I ain't admitting anything mark you, nothing has ever been proved - compared to some of the stuff that goes on in this city.
But someone who's take a bribe, well, that's like allowing the rich to avoid justice.

- That wasn't why I did it.

- I know, but you know Vimes.

- Yeah, I know Vimes alright.

This totally fits Vimes' personality. He is a BIG believer in justice for all, and hates bullies and the aristocracy, and, uh sort of morally inflexible. If he had a grudge against, say, bribery, he might STRONGLY persecute it, even if it wasn't SPECIFICALLY the kind he hated. His moral inflexibility has served him very well during his adventures (See: The summoning dark), but for a guy like Lewton, it could be sort of annoying.

This also gives some depth to Lewton - he's not just "Mr. Heart of Gold pretending to be dark", bribery is no joke. I bet we'll find out more about it later!

It would be very easy to imagine Vimes not getting along with a sardonic, morally-malleable guy like Lewton. And if Vimes was off the sauce, and Lewton a heavy drinker, well... the watch might not have been the place for Lewton.


- What's Vimes up to these days?

- He got married.

- Married?!
He was only ever married to his job.

- Nah, straight up.
He married into the nobility.

- Old Stoneface in the nobility?
Huh, that'd drive him crazy.

- Well, he's sort of nobility himself now.

- What?!

- They made him commander of the watch.
And we've got a great new premises down on Pseudopolis yard.
They're full of paintings and vases and all sorts.

- Full?

- Well, maybe not as full as when we moved in, but pretty full.
You'll have to call around sometime.

- Yeah, that'd be good.

- We've got a lot more members in the watch these days.
AND, we've got a new dartboard.

- Life in the fast lane, eh?
Do you seriously think it's a good idea for me to call around?
I mean, Vimes isn't going to like it.

- Whatever you may think about him, he's loyal to his job.
I can't say he'll welcome you with open arms, but he won't stop you.

Mysterious Passengers

- Do you know anything about some passengers that came into town by ship the other day?

- That's not much to go on.

- You're a Corporal in the watch, you're supposed to have a keen, insightful mind.

- They brought that regulation into the watch after I joined.

(This isn't good info, but I thought it was funny enough to include. Nobby sounds outraged and officious, not self-deprecating, in that last line.)


- Have you heard of the Milka?
It arrived in town a short time ago.

- How long ago?

- Three days.

- That's strange.


- Well, there's been a string of odd murders in the last three days.

- What do you mean, "odd". I mean this is Ankh-Morpork we're talking about.

- I'm not sure I should discuss the details with a pavilion.

- A CIVILIAN, Nobby. How much have you had to drink?

- I'm as sober as the day I was born!

- That's... a frightening thought.

New Location: Pseudopolis yard

New Clue: Mysterious Murders - "Nobby had told me that there were some mysterious murders in Ankh-Morpork in the last few days."

Hmmmm. The plot thickens.

Mundy is pretty clearly involved in a lot more than just a jilted lover. The captain and crew were badly shaken by his passage, enough that they don't want to talk to us, and are trying to stonewall us getting on their ship.

Additionally, as soon as he showed up, there were a series of "odd" murders in Ankh-Morpork.

And odd for Ankh-Morpork, has to be... odd.

We're into something DEEP now, goons.

Let's head back to our office to think a little, and next time, we'll investigate Pseudopolis yard to get some more FACTS!