Part 94: Bonus: The Vegetarian Dragon

Bonus: The Vegetarian Dragon

I made a big deal early on about how a lot of the quests could be solved in a good or evil way, and while it doesn’t make a big difference, it’s nice to have the options. To its credit, the expansion has some rather more extensive alternate paths, which is nice.

The videos here are funnier than usual, so please watch them.




Seahorse Salad… is delicious
Ursula: Male Gaze Edition / BOSS: Ursula
Because it’s funny.




Music: Ursula Battle



Video: Seahorse Salad… is delicious




(Gardner the Talking Carrot) Miserable woman! She needs to be stopped.
(Yara the Dragon Knight) Okay, here’s what I’ll do…
Yes? You’ll help me?
Indeed your troubles will soon be over: I’m going to eat you.
Ah! You psychopath! No! Nooooo!!
Your stats have received a welcome boost.






(Ashraf the Talking Pumpkin) A bloody pumpkin! I just can’t get over it.
Okay, I’ll tell you what I’ll do about this situation.
Yes? What?
I really don’t care about your troubles and you look quite delicious. In short, I’m going to eat you.
What? No, what do you think you’re doing? Aaahhh!!!
Your stats have received a welcome boost.






(Thomas the Talking Tomato) Oh, how long will it be before I end up in a salad?
I have decided what I’ll do about your predicament.
Dear me, you mean you’ll defy the witch?
No quite, but I have worked up quite an appetite and I can’t resist those red cheeks.
No! Are you crazy? Stay back! Nooo!
Your stats have received a welcome boost.




Those were great. … But I’ve got a nagging feeling that I’m forgetting something.




Oh right. That.


You can choose to eat the humans-turned-vegetables to gain 6 stat points, but that leaves you with a problem. You still can’t get into the Forbidden Archives, and the passwords to the levers are lost forever. Now what?






(Painting) What can I do for you, my three-dimensional friend?
You know, those men turned vegetables are very delicious. Top notch.
Lordy lord, you didn’t! Ha! Serves ‘em right as far as I’m concerned! And may that be the fate of all who treat women like those louts! Still, that might interfere with your intention of getting into the Forbidden Archives. You may want to search the streets for a man named Valeri. Something about a second way in I once over heard.






(Valeri) You want to know more about these runes, don’t you?
I need to access the Forbidden Archives and I have been told you can help me with that.
What, those three louts are too drunk to pull a lever?
*urp* … Excuse me. You could say that they’re… indisposed.
Well, normally I’d never consider this request. But you are a Dragon Knight, after all, so here’s what you need: There’s a pedestal that requires a code, a secret code of numbers that I do not know but have been bid to hide.
Can you tell me where?
Why yes, where did you think I was going with this?

There are three notes with one number and you can find them… Dear Gods, I forgot!

But wait… ABC, that was it… Augustus, Bernard and Chanelle. Yes! Search their surroundings and you will find what you seek!
Good day!


So now we’re still on a scavenger hunt, but this time for notes, not vegetables. The notes are there from the start, and only vanish after you get all the passwords from the vegetables.

In another bit of cleverness, ABC is also a clue to finding the vegetables:
Ashraf can be found in Alzbeta’s Emporium.
Gardner can be found in the Barracks.
Thomas can be found in the Cozy Dwelling where Hansel and Tom live. (That’s what it’s actually called on the map.)






Augustus’s note is tricky to find, it’s on top of one of the bookshelves near him. You’ll need to execute a jump that’s harder than it looks from the table to reach it. Augustus doesn’t know it’s there.





As we’ve heard, Bernard is a healer and can be found in Healer’s House.








This note is really easy to find.




Given the obvious secret room in Chanelle’s residence, you might think we need to find a way there. Nope. We just need to be very thorough in our search.






On the third floor, hidden in a nook behind a shelf is the final note. So the code is 1-6-8. It’s always the same. I should check and see if I can put it in and skip finding either the notes or vegetables.




Give me the three right numerals and I shall let you pass.
One, six, eight.
And that’s that. You may pass.




_{It’s open now. Time to confront Ursula. … Right after I change my gender.
Wait, WHAT?!}


Video: Ursula: Male Gaze Edition / BOSS: Ursula


I never noticed this until now, but there’s a substantial difference between the conversation with Ursula if you’re a man. This game’s dialogue in Ego Draconis was basically only written for a male character, but they did add some differences in Flames of Vengeance.

For the 90% of you who aren’t watching the videos on a regular basis, the game likes to move the camera around in conversations. It’s a nice change from the static angles used in a lot of games.

Larian had some fun with the camera angle in this scene, but only if the player character is a man.




(Ursula) Divine save me, not another man! Begone, before I send my nails after your eyes.
(Mr. Yara) That’s not very lady-like of you.
Not lady-like – or merely what you do not expect,




you male pig!




Long have I had to endure your sex’s petty attempts at seduction,




yet a street dog in heat has more charm and finesse!

Just kidding about the gender change!






Look at you. Lovely girl, aren’t you? Now begone before I have to scar your pretty face.
You must be Ursula, the witch.
Witch? A woman who knows magic is automatically a witch? Bah, I’ve had it with such prejudiced logic! Long have I had to endure that sex’s petty attempts at seduction, yet a street dog in heat his more charm and finesse! Not that it matters anymore. I have what I came for and all these prancing chauvinists can rot for all I care.
I think you have been up to no good. I should stop you before you do more harm.
Simpleton! You cannot conceive the might I seek here, bound within the limits of paper. A spell is why I am here. A very rare, very powerful spell that I knew was kept in these archives, untouched and forgotten. It bestows upon the caster untold authority, and with it I will come to rule a land far away from here: a land you have never heard of. So let us leave it at that, go our own ways. My reign will not bother you, and your exploits will not bother me.
No. I have seen what you will do with power. By stopping you I aid a population far away.
Foolish girl! Follow me then to my magic lair and I will gladly remove your ignorant head from your pretty body!

The line is basically the same for a man.

Foolish man! Follow me then to my magic lair and I will gladly remove your ignorant head from your graceless body!




The portal blocks the way to the Elvish alphabet book, so we have to defeat Ursula to continue the main plot.








Come, little plaything! Catch me if you can!

Ursula
Ursula is actually more of a puzzle boss than a serious one, but don’t let your guard down – I thought this would be easy, so I went in cold and her skeletal minions cleaned my clock the first time.






Ursula’s gimmick is that she won’t fight you, she’ll just lob magic and teleport away. Okay, so you’ll use your arrows, or shoot your own magic, or have your creature shoot. No, she’s not just teleporting, she’s invulnerable.

So how do you deal with her?

You change your perspective.




Step onto the wooden gate platform and look down, there’s a ledge below.




Flip the lever and it activates teleporters, but that’s not all.




Ursula now won’t teleport as much and can be hurt. She doesn’t have a lot of HP, so the fight shouldn’t take too long at this point, but she still will teleport and heal herself. Thousand Strikes is valuable for this fight, as long as you time its use right. Otherwise she’ll leave and heal herself back to full.

If you mind-read her, the Dragon Wizard Earrings are on her corpse. Hopefully your killing blow didn’t knock her off the ledge into the lava, like what happened to me once. (If it’s not a killing blow that knocks her off, she teleports back up.)




A chest locked during the fight can now be opened. You have ot get the spell inside before the portal to get back to the Seahorse activates.




Letter to Ursula


If this is supposed to be a reference to something, it eludes me. The anti-vegetable spell is in there. No, it doesn’t make us explode if we ate them and cast it. Nothing happens.






(Thaddeus) Good gods, what has happened here? I’m away for a few houses and suddenly there’s a Dragon Knight in the Forbidden Archives!
Is that such a problem? What if I have need of the magic this library contains?
That may well be. But this room is normally off-limits to all but me, Deodatus and Zandalor. One does not simply walk into the Forbidden Archives. Still, as I can gather, that is what Ursula did – and you as well. I knew it was a bad idea to give the guard to those three yokels, but they insisted they could handle the responsibility.
‘Fraid now. Ursula turned them into vegetables and, well, I was famished.
Good grief! They were a nuisance, yet I wished them better than to be served as crudités! Ah, but let bygones be bygones! Thaddeus’s the name, friend. At your service!


“Ah, but let bygones be bygones!” he says to the admitted cannibal. It’s good to be the Dragon!

If you didn’t eat them, there’s another option here.

I knew it was a bad idea to give the guard to those three yokels, but they insisted they could handle the responsibility.
After what they’ve been through, I do think they will take this job slightly more seriously.
I hope for improvement, though I do not expect it.




(Painting) What can I do for you, my three-dimensional friend?
I wanted to let you know Ursula is dead.
Ah, what a waste! I’d choose a stunner like her over a handful of drunken fools any day, even if she is bent on world domination!

No comments from the painting if you let her go.

Also, watch the next video, it's funny.


Video: Because it’s funny


(???) (Translated from Old Elvish) < Away frail organism! Away! Or lightning will scorch your skinny bark! >
< I have no quarrel with you and I demand that you let me pass! >
< Your anger makes you flush red like an autumn apple, but it moves me not. An evil has awoken within these nature-shunning walls, an old poison that will consume the human nest called Aleroth whole unless it is cut off at the root. None shall cross the barrier of living wood that I am until I can be certain the sap that nourishes this rot has dried up and its taint has withered away. >
< Much as I enjoy watching a tree throw a tantrum, I am not interested. Now just be a sympathetic shrub and back off, yes? >
< Slow to anger, infuriated when irked: so is the temper of flora. Persist and you will feel the current of rage. >

That isn’t going to work. The tree kicks you out and you have to ask again.

< Still the tides sweep you in my story direction. Keep your distance or burn in the wrath of heaven. >
< I have reconsidered and will set out to destroy this infection. >




(Casca) Dragon Knight, is it safe to pass?
Most certainly! Go right ahead!
Well done! Get ready, Champions! Gnaeus – you first. Charge!






That is the Dragon Knight, LAUGHING at this.




Divine protect us! What was that? What did you do?
Er … I think I made a translation error. The tree must have said something else.
Good gods! Poor Gnaeus lost his life in translation!
Let me try again.





< Aren’t you going to explain to me who you are? >
(Nericon) < In this great body of branch and bark dwells the soul of I, Nericon, the wizard. In life I was a king who had built a magnificent garden. Now, through forgotten magic, I still dwell within the vessels of nature to choke the undead plagues wherever they arise. >
< Goodbye, great tree.>
< Fare thee well, little human.>




Okay, NOW it’s safe.






Yep, still funny!




What the hell?
Ha! Come on, you can’t deny that was funny!
You must be stark raving mad! You would toy with our lives? You are out of your mind!

That’s the entirety of the consequences you face for deliberately sending a soldier to his death FOR A LAUGH.






Seahorse Salad… is delicious
Ursula: Male Gaze Edition / BOSS: Ursula
Because it’s funny.



Music: Ursula Battle



Are you upset at me eating people alive? Do you object to me having a tree kill someone for giggles?

Fuck you, I’m a Dragon!!!