Part 8: Chi Chi's Wedding Dress Will Burn!? Can Goku Put Out The Flames Of Fire Mountain!?Howdy, folks, and welcome back! Last time, on Attack of the Saiyans, we beat the shit out of Piccolo Jr. Today, Goku and Chi Chi are getting ready for their wedding ceremony, so let's head out.
Shit's on fire this update.
To kick things off, let me tell you, I'm not feeling the best today. This update isn't very long and is pretty much all but it sets up the next one, which is a bit more actiony.
For a DBZ game, it's amazing how much people talk and talk and talk. You'd think I'd remember that, considering I've played through this game four or five times, but much like all the emotion bubbles, I seem to not remember that.
Then again, there's also a "Skip" button for cutscenes that I abuse when I'm playing this for fun.
If you're wondering what the Ox-King is the king of, he's the king of Fire Mountain. He also trained with Grandpa Gohan, under Master Roshi, and the Ox-King is a pretty capable fighter.
But, enough of that; if the coloring weren't enough of an indication, we're in a flashback.
As for why this dialog is set against the backdrop of these two fighting at the tournament, I don't know.
Still, Chi Chi and Goku had met a while before this.
Which Goku had forgotten about, as he's Goku and had other stuff on his mind.
Probably noodles and sandwiches, in fact.
But he had once promised Chi Chi he would marry her.
Which she remembered, since I doubt a gal forgets when a man promises to marry her.
Did you think I was just making a silly joke when I said Goku thought a widow was a kind of burrito?
However, he's a man who sticks to his promises, so he's going to marry Chi Chi.
Doesn't it, though?
That's a big goddamned castle.
See, at one point, Ox-King's castle used to be surrounded completely by fire, which he had asked a wizard to do. It would keep intruders out, y'know?
However, the blaze reached a point where even Ox-King himself couldn't get in there, and that's just no bueno.
Goku had first met the Ox-King when he went into the castle to obtain a Dragon Ball.
He ended up fighting the Ox-King, too, as it's Dragon Ball and you have to have a fight somewhere in there, right?
Eventually, Master Roshi ended up coming by to help put out the blaze.
Roshi succeeded, but he put out a lot more than just the fire.
Using a Kamehameha Wave, Roshi blew up the Ox-King's castle on accident.
And the goddamned mountain it was on.
Don't look at me like that, Chi Chi. Just reporting the facts, ma'am.
Being a king, Ox-King is filthy rich and has his own treasure room.
Never mind that our main character is marrying Chi Chi, his daughter, who presumably could get a load of dough from him if she wanted to.
No, if we want money, we have to do it the old fashioned way by kicking the shit out of enemies.
Maybe I shouldn't talk about cold, hard cash when a sentimental moment is going on.
Don't ask much about Chi Chi's mother; very little is known about her, other than she died of an illness the same year Chi Chi was born.
And you get to wear it when you get married!
Okay, admit it, how many of you were hoping Ox-King was going to put that on?
Oh, and Chi Chi now wants a wedding ceremony.
Right on her DBZ wiki page
Never mind, I'm dumb.
Goku, don't question it. Just let it happen, as it'll be easier on you.
I imagine telling Goku this is like telling a toddler that the car won't start until they have their seat belt on.
Oh, Ox-King, you brought it up. You knew what would happen here.
At this point, I think Ox-King has just the small village, but that's not bad, considering some old guy blew up his castle and the mountain it was on.
Thankfully, there's no filler quest to go and get support from the villagers. Even though the stuff we're doing now, if I remember right, is just anime filler.
Oh, yeah, didn't mention it before, but the Ox-King is a huge fucking dude. Like, really goddamned big.
His size also tends to fluctuate, and he's often shown being bigger than that. There are some shots where even the tallest of the cast would barely reach his stomach.
Also, according to the Dragon Ball Wiki, apparently Ox-King has a power level of 900. Bit of an interesting factoid, especially since around this point, Goku is barely breaking 400.
The Wiki also says that Ox-King was more about raw power than actual technique. He doesn't know the Kamehameha, despite training with Roshi, because he just couldn't get it down.
However, I'm pretty sure he could--
--Uh-oh. What the hell is this?
Goku and Chi Chi come running out.
Also, this is a good time to mention that the Ox-King's castle is on fire.
Ox-King bravely offers to go and rescue Chi Chi's dress while she and Goku escape.
And off he goes. That doorway is probably also around 12 feet tall. The only character I know of who is normally taller than the Ox-King is probably Broly.
He'll be fine. Hopefully.
He's been gone barely five seconds, guys. Give him a chance.
However, it's already far too hot for Goku to get any closer to helping the Ox-King.
Now, the fire doesn't look like much from here, right? It really doesn't.
Yeah, it's just a wee bit more of a blaze than those inside shots indicate.
Yeah, because that worked so well the last time.
I guess if he blows it all up again and it's no longer on fire, he technically succeeded.
Chi Chi remembers what happened last time, and at this point, Goku is much stronger than Roshi.
Then again, the DB Wiki also maintains that Roshi used a "MAX Power Kamehameha" which is different from the regular Kamehameha. And yes, they capitalized "MAX" just like that.
And also apparently a skill he never taught anyone else, or else something he learned himself just by refining the technique. Still, the major difference is that the MAX Power version is just a bigger, more fuck-off inducing Kamehameha wave.
The screen whites out as Goku attempts to rescue Ox-King.
However, it's of no use. Shit's still on fire, yo.
That's probably better than blowing everything up, but what about everything being on fire, Goku?
I don't think a fire that size is just going to putter out, like one of those shitty snakes awful parents give their children on the 4th of July.
: My pants are on fire! Does that make me a liar?
Considering he's not on fuck-fire, Goku, I think he's fine.
Guess what we'll have to go find?
Yeah, it's this magic thing that--
Fuck it. Roshi will explain from the Negative Dimension.
The best part of this is not how Roshi knows about it, but what he was using it for.
If you don't think Roshi is goddamned amazing, you need to get the fuck out of this thread and go reevaluate your life.
Seriously. Legendary cloud and rain-making object, and the old coot was using it as a pot-holder.
Time for a new character!
It's not Kami, Roshi, Mr. Popo or anyone else.
However, it is Roshi's older sister, who is well over five hundred years old.
Her Japanese name is Uranai Baba, which translates to something like All-Seeing Crone.
And so, without time to waste, we rush off to Baba's Palace.
Baba is an interesting character, in that she can see the future (she makes a business of it, actually, charging ten million Zeni a pop for it), is old and wise (I'm half-right on that, though), can strike deals with King Yemma (we'll meet him later, so more on that then) to bring dead people back for a single day, and can use hypnosis, telekinesis and has some magical abilities, but we only see those in the anime, if I remember right.
"What kind of waves? Well, I don't know! Microwaves? Cosmic waves? ...Oh no, I hope it's not cosmic waves! I'm scared of those! Aaaaahhh!"
Yeah, that's the real dialog. I didn't make this guy a portrait, as I'm feeling lazy.
And in we go.
There's a shop up here, without much interesting in it, and also the spot where Baba has her five warriors, who include a vampire, a mummy, Spike the Devilman and Grandpa Gohan, brought back from the dead for a single day.
There's a lot of information in Dragon Ball, and I know I'm not doing the best in explaining it all. If someone in the thread wants to take a crack at it, be my guest. I'm not the most knowledgeable Dragon Ball guy around.
And Baba has a cold. Not that this affects anything.
Sure she could. She can see the future, y'know, as well as watch just about anything and see whatever with her crystal ball.
Guess you didn't see that one coming.
I know how you feel. I felt pretty crappy earlier today, too.
: I see a spiky-haired moron who won't leave me to my misery, but...
Despite saying that, she's still going to point us in the right direction.
Excellent question, Goku.
See, the Dragon Ball world is one of those where plenty of myths and legends are actually true and valid explanations for various mysteries of the world.
However, things are very bad in the furnace at the moment.
Follow the gigantic, fuck-off flames?
Heard? I'm willing to bet you know exactly how to get there, but you're just grumpy from being sick.
This is yet another character based on someone from the Journey To The West, where Dragon Ball got a lot of its inspiration from. I'm not going to go into that, because, seriously, that's a lot of stuff to talk about.
Or maybe we'll have to fight her to get the Bansho Fan. With this series, it's hard to tell.
And away we go! To Mount Five Element!
Which is north of Baba's Palace, thankfully. And, according (once again) to the Dragon Ball Wiki, Mount Five Element is the antipodal region to Fire Mountain. I thought that would mean they'd have to be on literally opposite sides of the planet, but it's early, I've just woken up, and I'm probably not firing on all cylinders.
Mt. Five Element is one of those mountains guarded by a bigass wall and a giant gate you have to go through. It's very tricky to get in here.
That looks scary as shit, so let's save that for the next time, shall we?
The next time where we go in here, beat up monsters and maybe recover the Bansho Fan so that Ox-King doesn't get roasted alive! Stay tuned!