The Let's Play Archive


by Rin

Part 15

If we want to, we can eavesdrop on Brian telling Benrime about his travels:

Benrime: Southlanders... So you have visited Altaban and Monterba?

Brian: I've been further south still, to the Capes...and beyond. I tell you, if you think the winter here is harsh, you should count your lucky stars.
There are lands beyond the South Sea that are frozen through both winter and summer. The sun is as cold as the moon down there.

And again:

Brian: I have indeed. They will let anyone enter and stay in their lands, just as long as you respect their customs...and as long as you're human, of course.

Benrime: What is it like? Do they treat their own people as harshly as they do ours?

Women hold all the positions of power in Azadi society, if you hadn't figured that out already

Brian: Still, I encountered no animosity. People took me in, fed me, told me about their history and religion. I learned a lot.
Whatever the Azadi have done here, they are not cruel or evil. They do put a lot of faith in their Goddess and their Empresses, yes. But it's heartfelt.

Alright, let's see if we can track down any leads on getting to the Dark People's libary.

Oldtown seems the best place to start.

That kinda sucks . Dolmari appear to be blue skinned humans, as far as I can tell.

As we walk further into town, April runs into an old "friend"

An interesting note before watching the video: Roper Klacks and Brian Westhouse are both voiced by the same actor. He does a much better job as Brian, but it's still impressive how different he sounds here.

Roper Klacks!? /Backup

Roper Clacks is a victim of horrible Adventure game logic. For the most part TLJ avoided direct confrontation, but April actually infiltrated Klack's flying castle and made it all the way to the top to confront the evil wizard. How do you defeat him? You hand him a calculator. April asks him math problems and he can't solve them and then he gets sucked into the calculator. It is the single most nonsensical moment in TLJ.

Let's talk with him some more.

Let's bring up that nonsense and see if it got retconned to make any sense.

Roper Klacks: I had to learn advanced trigonometry. After that, it was as easy as multiplying the root of pi with the volume of my mathematical prison.

: Oh. That sounds pretty complicated.


Okay, let's ask about his book.

: You said something about being an author?

Roper Klacks: A published one! I wrote my memoirs a few years ago. 'Farewell to My Wizardin' Days', by Roper F. Klacks.

: What's the 'F' stand for?

Roper Klacks: Nothing. It just looked better on the cover. Anyway, as it turned out, the first and only print run had a slight...problem. A small charm made its way onto page one hundred and eight. When readers got to that page, the book, as misfortune would have it, exploded.

: And you had nothing to do with that?

Roper Klacks: Me? Absolutely not! I've been aquitted of all charges, and every single lawsuit has been dismissed in the magical court. I'm quite innocent. It does mean, however, that only one copy of 'Farewell to My Wizardin' Days', by Roper F. Klacks exists. And that would be mine. I've decharmed it, and page one hundred and eight is quite safe to read now, if you're interested.

: Not really, no.

Alright down to business, let's see if he knows anything about the Dark People.

Roper Klacks: That's great! Anything to assist the woman who turned my life around.

: I'm looking for a way to get to the city of the Dark People.

Roper Klacks: Visiting old friends, I take it? Your adventures are the stuff of legends, April Ryan! By the way, did you ever read that pamphlet they published, the one with the amusing drawings? 'April Rye-bread and the Rod of Joie'?

: Unfortunately, no.

Roper Klacks: Ha! Well, I'll never forget that illustration where the Dolmari lady takes the Rod of Joie and sticks it right--

: Anyway, about the Dark People's City...?

Roper Klacks: Ah, yes. What do you plan on doing there?

: I need to visit their library.

Roper Klacks: The library. Indeed. They are collectors, these Dark People. They collect all sorts of knowledge. Arcane, forbidden knowledge... Ahem. Anyway, as luck would have it, there's a Shadowship docked down in the harbour right now. I'm sure they'll let the famous April Rye-br-- I mean, April Ryan. I'm sure they will give you passage to their city.

And we have a lead!

April and the Shadow People have some history; they are servants of the Blue of the kin, aka the Blue Dragon. They aided April on her journey, calling her a "wave" because of the massive effect she had on the world with every action. This granted her a special status with the Dark People, who normally don't associate with other races apart from collecting.

Let's head down to the port and talk to them.

It's worth noting that this is a different port then the one April often went through in TLJ.

And there's the Dark People's ship, if you can even call it that. Floating stone

Let's talk with the Rebel's resident seaman and see how things are going.

The Captain: Most of the supplies are on board. We're missing a few crates of grains and vegetables, a delivery of potions, and some other bits and pieces.

: Good. Don't linger too long.

The Captain: The paperwork's already being processed by the Azadi. Those fools! If they only knew what--

: Shh. Not here. I don't think it's a good idea to tempt fate.

The Captain: Ha, I didn't think you believed in that spiritual claptrap, Raven! Fate? Pah! We make our own destiny.

: Still... Better to be on the safe side. You don't foresee any problems, then?

The Captain: Everything's in order. This ship's going to the least according to all the properly stamped and perfectly forged documents.

: I'll rest easy only when you've reached safe harbour.

Surely nothing could go wrong.

Okay, let's talk with the Dark... Person.

What, you don't recognize me?

I'm April Ryan! I saved the world!

Yeah, but I saved the world you ass.

Also, saving the world. Done that.

A Human who saved the damn world!

April isn't stupid enough to actually think this will work, but it's required to say this in order to solve the puzzle.

Can I have yours then? Because I can always use more.

Do you only give me passage while I'm in the process of saving the world? Having done it before isn't good enough for you?

Say, who do we know who could--

Roper Klacks: Oh, I don't know. It's the last remaining copy, you know. All the other copies spontaneously combusted.

: I'm aware of that. But I need something to get passage on that Shadowship down in Shady Quay.

Roper Klacks: You believe my book would help with that?

: Maybe. The Dark People collect books, and yours is quite unique, isn't that so?

Roper Klacks: It is. It is.

: Wouldn't you consider it an honour to have your first published novel become a part of the greatest library of Arcadia?

Roper Klacks: Hmm. I would. I would indeed! Wait, I have it right here. I carry it with me always.

Roper Klacks: And for the love of the Balance, do not hold it upside down when there's a full moon! Never again shall I glance upon 'The Top Ten Reasons Why You Should Not Build A Flying Castle' on page forty-two, and smile knowingly...

: But think about it. Thousands of people will get to enjoy your...unique outlook on life. Your book will be a part of something much, much greater.

Roper Klacks: You're right. Of course you're right.

Alright, time to cut a deal with the Shadowguide!

But you don't give passage to people who SAVE THE WORLD.

April Ryan, savior of the world and expert manipulator. It's the way Kreia would have wanted it.

But you don't, because I SAVED THE WOR-- er, because it's the only copy.

Just remember not to hold it upside down when there's a full moon.

And by speak with his brothers at the library,

he means do absolutely nothing. Oh telepathy, you cad.

That's kind of why I brought it here smart guy.

We've got your number now buddy!

Yeah yeah, sure, make me use the inventory menu.

Happy now? ... Wait, I thought it was "Farewell to My Wizardin' Days". KLAAACKS!


You really should have just let me on board in the first place, considering I SAVED THE WORLD.

No respect I tells ya.

And we're off!

But before the Chapter ends,

Let's check in with Zoe and Damien. /Backup
Huzzah, Zoe is whining again! Also, I smell awful romantic subplot. Damnit Ragnar, you're a good writer but please stop writing romance

Next Time we meet one of my favorite characters: the White of the Kin. And we're reunited with an old feathery friend!