Part 323: Ilya delighted / Blade virus / Sacrilege

Music: Time Together





Worth it for Rin's face alone.



Ilya hugs me.
I feel like I'm her brother, so I like how happy she is…



But Tohsaka is really mad, so my happiness adds up to zero… No, I think it's going in the negatives now.


"…Hmph. You've gone to a lot of work to flatter a little girl, Emiya-kun. Or what? Do you like little girls?"



Ow… Tohsaka scornfully emphasizes "Emiya-kun" to criticize me.
Her eyes look like they're blaming the socially weak, sending a wave of pain through my stomach.


"Haha, that's unsightly, Rin. It's unladylike to take out your anger on someone else when you get dumped. That's why Shirou hates you."



"……! D-Don't talk like a grown-up and say such a stupid thing…!
I only talked about common knowledge, and first of all, who was dumped by whom…!?"

Tohsaka roars.
Ilya laughs and keeps hugging me.



Ilya makes a big smile and embraces me.
I'm glad.
I'm twice as glad as before, but…



…Please do something about that cold stare of hers that doesn't let me excuse myself.

"What? If you have something to say, come out and say it."


"It's nothing. Your interests are none of my business. I'm not happy, but I'm not going to say anything about it.


But more importantly, why?"
She asks me directly.
But…



"Well. 'Why'… what?"
I made my choice without thinking, so I actually don't know why I chose Ilya.




"…Unbelievable. Do you really have a thing for little girls?"

It took her a long time to finally come to that conclusion.

"N-No way, you idiot! I-I-I just said it because I felt like it, and I'm Ilya's guardian now, so it's natural for me to choose her! Do you have a problem with that…!?"




"Yeah! You're my Servant, Shirou!"



Tohsaka is utterly stunned, Ilya is jumping around in joy, and it's a big mess.

Yup. We definitely picked the right option.


"……You're taking a defiant attitude now. Well, I'll let this go, but Sakura certainly has it tough."
""
I'm curious.
What exactly are you "letting slide," Tohsaka?





You have a responsibility to take Archer's place.
Your body doesn't just belong to you anymore."

""
I can't argue with that.
Tohsaka lost Archer, and my life was saved thanks to his arm.
…Then I have to help Tohsaka in his place.

"………Yeah, you're right. We'll leave the Servant thing aside for now, but I'll leave you in charge of everything.
I don't know all that much, so it's better if you take care of the plans."


"That's right. I'm in charge of thinking, and you're in charge of execution. We're cooperating, so I'll make sure you work hard."



He only sacrificed his life for his master's. He owed so much more.

Music: Surrounded by Smiling Faces



"Then let's part here for now. I'm going back to my house to pack, so you go on ahead."
"……? Pack? Are you going to come to my house?"


"Of course. We're cooperating now, so we have to be together. Ilya doesn't want to be at my house, and Sakura's living at your place. Your house has to be the main base, no matter how we look at it."

"Oh, yeah. When you put it that way, it makes sense."


"…Geez. I thought you were firm, but you're pretty loose too. Maybe I made the wrong choice."
Tohsaka sighs and starts walking in the opposite direction.

"…? My house is this way, Ilya. Why are you following Tohsaka?"


"It's just for a bit. Rin wants my help, so I'm going to go with her. I'll head over there as soon as we're done, so you go ahead."
"…?"
Ilya's going to help Tohsaka…?

"Really, Tohsaka?"


"Yeah. This is a serious matter, so we need one or two secret weapons. A secret I can't unlock myself might open to an Einzbern magus.


……But I really don't want to find one. If Tohsaka's inheritance, Kishua's keepsake, is just as I imagine, it's not something I can handle myself."



Ilya's skirt flutters as she runs off.

"……Kishua? Zel? Schweinorg?"
I tilt my head in wonder.
I've never heard those names before. Are they famous among legitimate magi?

Music: Stop





Music: Whirlpool of Fate 2

"I do not mind. I never had any attachment to it. I will not stop the Holy Grail from siding with them."
"You're right. You had no wish from the startif your words are true, it would not make sense to stop the Holy Grail."
The man laughs.
The priest's words…
As if to make fun of the fact that he has no wish.

""
He does indeed speak the truth.
It is just that the golden-haired man cannot comprehend the fact, but the priest has no wish.
Kotomine Kirei does not need the power of the Holy Grail.
All he has is a thorough inquiry.

The Holy Grail merely answers one's wish.
It is a machine to create the desired outcome for one's own question.
Is there a meaning in obtaining the answer that one wishes for?

"Kotomine. Let me ask again. You really have no interest in the Holy Grail?"
"I have no interest in a machine that grants wishes. The same should go for you, Gilgamesh. Our goals are not our wishes. We are merely seeking pleasure because it is more fun that way.
It is like eating food. A wish is something that is answered. But humans will not be saved if a wish grants itself."

The priest keeps staring up at the statue.
And beyond it.
To ten years in the past, when he still had a wish.



Understanding this, the boy grew just as his father expected.

There was no doubt.
His inability to love his father was unrelated to meeting the man's expectations.
The boy named Kirei grew up healthy.
……But there was one point.
He could not understand the "beauty" of which his father spoke.



In either case, he knew what he had forgotten.
His father prayed for him to be beautiful and named him Kirei.
That had always been his question.
The things his father considered beautiful…
The boy had never considered beautiful.

Music: Stop



Music: Church on the Hill



But he worked hard.
He tried to be pure and beautiful, and pursued something he did not have from the start.
Shaving away the skin, ripping off the flesh, and dislocating the bones.
He even tried looking within his body for what he could not find in his mind.

Kotomine is even more than Berserker.

His father spent over ten years on his pilgrimage wearing thorned shoes.
The distance he walked could stretch to the moon.
It was not for physical pain. For missionaries, the mental pain is far more significant.
The boy abstained from eating during their pious act.
If he was a sinner by nature, then according to the morals he believed in, he needed to punish himself to maintain balance in the world.

Ten years passed.
Unable to reach the epiphany he sought, he arrived at a single conclusion in its place.
It was simple.
In short, he did not have the sense to feel normal happiness.
Good matters that people consider right and find happiness in.
Philanthropy, trust, glory, safety.
Such matters did not delight him, and it's just that he was born with the deficiency.

All he took pleasure in was the suffering of others.
Murder by others, love and hatred of others, degradation of others.
Such negative concepts were the only things that made him feel happiness.
…His misfortune was carrying a sense of morality, even when he had such a mind.

The child understood at a young age that he was not in accord with the world, and he tried his best to overcome it.
He did not surrender to his condition by indulging in twisted pleasure.
He tried to save himself, one who could not find happiness in any normal way, by turning himself into a normal person.

And the path was his creed; to become a priest and preach life like his father.
It is said that God forgives everything.
So he thought God would even save someone "who is not born with it" like himself.



But there was no anguish there.
From the beginning, he sought after something that did not exist.
He did not lose something he had, so there was no reason for him to grieve.
The only thing that concerned the priest as he matured was the question "why?"

Yesat every crossroads of his life.
The pleasure of committing crimes.
One could understand if he reveled in his own corruption, satisfying his urges by committing crimes himself.
Wealth gained from evil deeds.
It would make sense if he entrapped others out of greed and obtained wealth.

But.
What was wrong with him to not even have the option of turning from good to evil?
Who could possibly be born a defective being and end his life still detached from the world?
Do they not come into this world with the premise that they harm the world?

Call of good sense.
Acknowledgment of morals.
Trial of justice.
Every one of these conclude that evil should not exist.
But what about it?
If it should not exist, why are such things created?

That is right.
If one has a deficiency, one should not be born.
The world hates evil and removes the faults.
But something that was never wanted was given life.
There are beings that exist to be hated and die.

The man inquired where the crime was.

His reward for years of anguish and blind devotion was not salvation.
Just… "why?"
It is a pure question, and also anger towards something unknown.



"I did not need the Holy Grail. I was just interested in what was inside it.
I sought the Holy Grail ten years ago because it tried to exist.
No matter what it may be, I bless anything that tries to come into existence. That is my job."

"Hah. Is that the case even if you have no interest in what is born?"
"…Of course. Even in the last Holy Grail War, I was not interested in the Holy Grail or its contents. All I had back then was hatred towards a person who was the exact opposite of me."

But the priest ponders.
He can only find pleasure in others' suffering, but he is interested in the end of this Holy Grail War.
Zouken's actions behind the scenes.
Another Holy Grail that is about to be born.
Someone called "all evils of this world" was brought into existence by the people, but not wanted by the people.
If it would conceive such a thing, maybe that is

"The whereabouts of good and evil. Something that was stuffed in the shell, but never hatched."
The Holy Grail cannot give answers.
The wish-granting machine fulfills its owner's desire.
So no revelation can be obtained even if someone without a wish obtains it.
But

"What if I do not ask for answers, but instead create something from the Holy Grail that can give the answer?"
"What…?"
The man narrows his eyes.
The priest is smiling in front of the statue.
"Kotomine."
That smile is that of a dying woman.
That expression is worn by a man with no interest or desire.



Music: Stop