Part 16: Page 16: Leviathan or The Matter, Forme and Power of a Common Wealth Ecclesiasticall and Civil

Page 16: Leviathan or The Matter, Forme and Power of a Common Wealth Ecclesiasticall and Civil

That page title's a mouthful, isn't it?


Beneath the Horizon

As much as I don't want to do this, let's get started.


Win Place Show Chocobo!

Leviathan volume 2.....what to say about it....
It's really easy and is a gigantic waste of my time?


Prelude
The Boy Who Cried Leviathan: Bubbling Barrage Prologue

Some time had passed since Leviathan and the boy had first had their underwater race. The mighty beast had actually become quite fond of his human friend. The boy had learned his lesson from Leviathan and no longer let loose the foolish lies he once did. He still had an attitude, though.
"Hey, you! Funky-smelling fish-face! Let's race again!"
As the two engaged in competition with each other, their relationship grew closer. During one race, the boy noticed something strange. Born from Leviathan's wake were schools of golden fish!
Leviathan told the boy, "As you can see, I am the one who makes the delicious fish you eat every day. Sadly, I've never been able to catch one and try it for myself."
"Leave it to me! I'll make sure you feast on golden fish this evening!" So the boy made ready...

"Funky-smelling fish-face"? Half of that is unprovable, and the other half isn't even an insult. I don't...bleh. I'm too tired to be at all curious about their insult choice.




As you can('t?) see, the only thing we have open to us is Versus 1. Might as well get our feet wet, if you'll pardon the pun? _{don't pardon the pun it was terrible}


Battle de Chocobo
Bubbling Barrage Versus 1

So this game. It's really stupidly simple. Watch the video and you'll see - the controls hardly get in the way of the fish-collecting. It helps that apparently figuring out which direction Leviathan is going next is an arcane art only I am a master of. The top screen is useless - all it does is show where the heads of everybody are. Nothing important, so I cut it out (don't be mad)



Hang on, I'm confused about something. We had the bubbles to start the area, then nobody needed them, but now they're necessary again?


Victory

Oh god Jailbird I am so sorry



Also we unlock Versus 2 and 3. But that poor Jailbird with one point.



My last score was 35. I doubt two extra Jailbirds will stop me from crushing them.


Battle de Chocobo
Bubbling Barrage Versus 2

C'mon, I hope Versus 5 is at least a challenge. This is just stupid now.



Boco looks fucking pissed in this screenshot.
'Say it to my face, motherfucker!'


Victory

Is there an owned emoticon? There should be.... there it is!



Ah, our first epilogue. Good show.


Prelude
The Boy Who Cried Leviathan: Bubbling Barrage Epilogue - Savior Behavior

The boy swam as quickly as he could and gathered a number of the golden fish. Leviathan finally got his chance to sample the scrumptious delicacy.
"You're from the village by the sea, right?" asked the majestic beast.
"Indeed I am."
"That location is far from ideal for fishing, isn't it? The tidal waves have turned the waters sour." Leviathan began spinning his serpentine tail in the water.

Return of Sharknado!



Suddenly, the stagnant waters receded from the village shores, and crystal-clear water rushed in to take their place. It was an aquatic paradise, home to coral reefs and a wide variety of gorgeous -- and delicious -- fish. The once untruthful and boastful boy had saved his poor village, but nobody ever found out about his valorous deeds.

Could you imagine living in the village when that happened? 'Hey Jim, what's happening?' 'I don't know, Bob. This weird water tornado showed up and then the water disappeared.' 'Is Moses a water tornado, Jim?'



The result we get is some awesome fish down by the dock on the shore.



On to the next of our chores.


Battle de Chocobo
Bubbling Barrage Versus 3

By chore I mean waiting two minutes to win.


Victory

I swear it's like the game isn't even trying anymore



Anyway, we've unlocked our next epilogue.


Prelude
The Boy Who Cried Leviathan: Bubbling Barrage Epilogue - The Kraken

The boy swam as fast as he could and gathered a number of the golden fish, when suddenly the monstrous Kraken appeared from the obsidian depths! "Blistering barnacles! It's the Kraken!"
The boy swam to Leviathan and reported that the evil beast was on its way.
"Now, now, boy... Don't start up your lying again, hear?" Leviathan didn't believe him!
The Kraken closed in...

Stop with the sea-related exclamations. Please. For everybody's sake.



Without warning, the Kraken lobbed a shot of ink at the boy, covering him from head to toe in mucky ooze. Leviathan looked at him and laughed heartily.
"Did you learn your lesson, boy? It only takes an instant to lose someone's trust. Gaining it back can take a lifetime."
The boy felt terrible for the way he had been. From that day on, he vowed to be the most honest person in the village.

Not exactly what I'd expect from one of the four crystal guardians. If I had to guess, I'd say 'The Kraken' is more likely Ultros.

Also, each time I make one of the storytime videos the boy becomes more and more from Brooklyn. I don't know why.



If you'll recognize this, it's the white Jailbird. We've helped him out, so now he owes us.



Maybe Volg can provide a challenge?


Battle de Chocobo
Bubbling Barrage Versus 4

Please?


Victory

While that is the closest anyone has gotten to beating me, there's still a 22 point gap. God damn.



This is for beating the required score (almost three times over). Pretty good card, especially versus a green or blue deck. The crystal ability can be picky, but in a deck that needs only blue crystals it can work wonders.



Oh and we get this. That's all three epilogues in one update. Don't you feel happy?


Prelude
The Boy Who Cried Leviathan: Bubbling Barrage Epilogue - The Name Game

The boy swam as fast as he could and gathered a number of the golden fish. After enjoying his feast, Leviathan said, "You know, boy, these fish are quite delicious indeed! Thank you for your efforts!"
"Actually, fish-fa-- I mean, Lord Leviathan, I'm the one who should thank you. You've taught me a lot."
"You don’t have to call me 'Lord,' boy."
"Mr. Leviathan?"
"No, that makes me feel old."
"Then fish-face it is!"
"How dare you!" roared the mighty ruler of the seas.
"Aaagh! I'm so sorry!"
"No, no, boy. Fish-face is just fine."

We've hit peak Brooklyn. I'm so sorry.



The once lonely Leviathan had gained a true friend at last. From that day on, the two were rarely seen apart.

Oh how sweet.



Our reward this time is the crystal.


Crystal Room

Boco! Heed the tale which I shall weave for you. It is a tale which began long ago and continues to this very time and place. Four hundred years ago, Bebuzzu was defeated by four heroes... A knight blessed by the fire spirit. A white mage blessed by the earth spirit. A dragoon blessed by the water spirit. And lastly, a black mage blessed by the light spirit.

It still bugs me that it's light and not wind.

Their descendants live on today, and when their powers are once again united, the lock shall be undone at last.



This really HAS turned into Kingdom Hearts, hasn't it? Now we just need Bebuzzu to pop in and start shouting about hearts.


Irma's Troupe

This time, I'll finish you for sure! Rise again, Bebuzzu, with the power of water!



If I'm not mistaken, this is the third meal you've prepared for me!



Yum yum eat 'em up

(Gulp!) Hmmm... Salty!



I...don't....what is....huh?

Boco, prepare yourself! I will destroy you, this island, and the entire world!



This might be the first actually threatening appearance of Bebuzzu we have.



Bring it on, fish-face!

_{oh god now i'm doing it too}


Battle Theme
Card Game - Boco vs Leviathan Bebuzzu

So this fight is when they're starting to get unfair. They know they can't beat me in a fair fight, so they're trying to beat me unfairly. I'll beat them unfairly first; replaying the card game repeatedly until I get a favorable set of cards.



This irritated me SO MUCH. I was so close to winning the match with Omega Cannon but noooooo, Phoenix had to add three green crystals and push the red I needed off the edge. Mother fucker.

You can't just let me have this, can you? I can't have a cool fight picture, I have to have Lamia and an Adamantoise. I could have had OMEGA CANNON. But no. The gods have to be cruel and unusual. Because they can be.

Fuck.



So we won, go us.



I'll be back... Hardback, that is!!! Ha-ha-ha!





Oh hey, that brings us up to two now. There's a third nearby on one of those pillars that we lowered earlier.



When Bebuzzu absorbs the power of the final crystal, he will attain his true form! And when that time comes, you won't stand a chance!

All that's missing is an evil laugh and we have the perfect villainous lackey speech.



Yes, milady!

Vamoose is an old word and I've only heard it used by my dad. It's weird seeing it in a game text.



And we're onto Chapter 5. While the plural of apparatus is correct, I prefer thinking of it as apparati. You know, like a platypus.

Next time: Golems and Ghouls