Part 23: Update Twenty Three: Are All Princes Idiots?

Update Twenty Three: Are All Princes Idiots?

Welcome back! Last time, on Final Fantasy IV, Leave and Cid bravely sacrificed their lives; Leave's for the dwarves and Cid's to seal the Underworld. Today, we're going to head back to Baron to find out what Cid had in store there for us, so let's mosey.



I'm skipping most of the trip back to Baron, as you probably know it by now.





We've gotta head over to the east tower, as that's where the airship crew is.



But there's this bit of interesting information on the way over there; we'll check it out in a minute.





And thank God Cid didn't attach this hook the last time he was around. If he had, I don't know how we would have made it out of the Tower of Babel.



On the airship, these two run around, attaching the hook.



I don't know they do it, as they only ever fuck around up on the deck.





Unless the hook was already attached, and these guys were just installing a control panel for it or something.





OH GEE I WONDER WHERE WE GO NEXT





I don't think these guys would even believe us if we told them that Cid was dead. These guys work with Cid frequently, so they know him even better than we do.





Before we can even try and tell them that Cid went out in an explosion of nuclear hellfire, they scoot and skedaddle.



I think they're better off not knowing.



Before we go to the Cave of Eblan, let's check out this tower.



Rumors of a ghost down here are interesting.



Over down here is where the ghosts are at.





...Did the ghost build a throne room? What the hell kind of spook are we dealing with?





The King of Baron? Why the hell is he haunting this tiny bit of real estate?



Look at him, in all of his kingly glory.



Well, ain't it just convenient that we have someone in the party who spent a hell of a long time there.



Cecil is still loyal to his king, even in death. Er, the king's death. Not his death.



Plus, it's interesting to note that the king is still willing to offer Cecil help, even though he renounced the dark sword and became a Paladin. If I remember right, the King of Baron was a Dark Knight in his youth and pushed Cecil toward the path of the Dark Knight.



So, now, let's get ourselves back to where the Hovercraft is.



It's still by Mt. Hobs, so we don't have to do any real hunting for it.



Exactly where I parked it.



Our hook just pops out of the bottom of the airship and grabs the Hovercraft.



And off we go.



Here's the Tower of Babel above ground. Eblan was the castle nearby, which we already looted.



Now, there is another area unlocked that we can hit now that we can transport the Hovercraft, but there's nothing we can do there just yet.



So, we'll hit it later, when it'll actually be useful to us. It's entirely worth our while.



The cave that'll take us back to the Underworld is right here, so let's get it over with.



This cave isn't very big, so it's a cinch getting through it.



But there are a ton of hidden passages around it.



Including two just ten feet from the entrance. And nobody in our party can use this Shuriken...How curious.



Remedies will cure all status ailments, except being dead, so they're pretty nice items. In the SNES version, this was the only status heal around, so you didn't have to fuck around with Golden Needles and Antidotes.



There is another path around there that'll take us to the same place going down the regular path will, but I decline to take it.



Mostly because I forgot about it.



Over to the right here is more treasure; it's where the path up above would have taken us.



There aren't many new enemies around here, as it's mostly just Skuldiers and the occasional Steel Golem.



However, the new enemies around are fucking cocksuckers.



This is the Bloody Bat's only attack; it deals a very small amount of damage.



A very small amount. It also inflicts Sap, so your health constantly drains.

They also only have 439 HP, and weak to Fire and Throw (Throw element is present in all of Bowser's spears and Rosa's bow shots), so they're easy enough to kill. Now, this doesn't seem too bad, does it?

The terrible thing is that fucking Vampire attack. It takes several seconds to complete and these little bastards are fast enough that they often go all in a row. They can appear up to four in a group, so that's about twelve to thirteen seconds of watching that fucking animation.



I hate these bastards for the time they waste. It's actually faster to run away from them and later on, I start doing that whenever I encounter these guys.



While I've got a moment of downtime before collecting that chest, let me ask you all a question.



You guys enjoying the thread? Thinkin' it's good stuff, with the GBA and DS LP's that are going on?



I sometimes wonder about stuff like that and I'm the kind of guy who enjoys validation, so I'm just going to come out and ask. Vampire Fangs cast Drain when used in battle, but Drain blows, so this is essentially just vendor trash.



And this is where we would have come out if we had taken the hidden passage over here up there.



Oh, and I forgot about the Ironbacks. They, uh...



They have 100 HP. I just looked it up in the bestiary, and they have 100 HP. I can't believe it. No wonder I don't remember these guys.



Anyways, let's continue on.





Down in the second basement, we find these people. These are the Eblanese people, and they are on the lookout for non-humans. Their shit must have been wrecked fantastically.





The Inn costs 700 gil to stay at, and the only items that the Item Shop sells are status healing items. It's a little underwhelming.



Their castle might be in ruins, but they are still proud citizens!



...Citizens who are proud of a shitty cave that takes a Hovercraft to reach.



The armor shop here has a couple of nice pieces of equipment.



Kain gets a suit of Ice Armor, while Kim gets the Black Robe.





The Black Robe also adds +5 Intellect, so Kim currently has 54 Intellect. The max on a stat is 99, so she's coming along quite well.



Over in the weapon shop, Rosa gets a Power Staff. There are Poison Arrows for sale, but I prefer Rosa with a staff, as Cecil and Bowser have all physical ass-whippings under control.



I also pick up a boomerang, because we're getting a new party member soon. Aren't you surprised?



The remnants of the Eblanese people aren't very large. It's a little sad when you think about it.





Rubicante must have done a hell of a job fucking these guys up.



I also entirely forgot to talk to these two, so I can't tell you what they say.



Oh, yeah, they're all ninjas, too. I don't think that's been mentioned, but yeah, Eblan was a nation of ninjas.



I think he's referring to Rubicante. And he is a monster and just so oh God, I love him.



What he doesn't mention is that the Prince is also kind of an idiot.



And he's also an orphan. Hell, he's like Kim, Cecil and Bowser.



Oh, sweetie, your prince will need four people's help to do that.



So let's go hunt down Commodore Numbnuts.



Immediately, we find an Ether.





Moving on, we find a downed ninja.



But first, we've gotta snag this Tent.





Just to the south of the injured ninja, there's a secret passage.



It leads to a Hi-Potion, while I'll gladly take. It's less MP I need to use to heal.





Another downed ninja.



Stop who? The Prince or the person who did this to you guys?



Over here, there's another secret passage. They all make sense now, since there are a ton of ninjas around.



Shurikens are kind of expensive, so finding them for free is pretty cool.



I also didn't talk to that ninja. I don't know why.



If you step above that rock and walk to the right, you can get to that passage with the two chests. In each chest, there's an Elixir. I didn't remember this until later, so you'll have to deal with them remaining closed. Sorry.



The other two chests have Hi-Potions in them.



So, the prince is a bit of a hot-head, eh? Good to know.



South and down the steps from that guy is this Spider's Silk; not as useful as it once was, since Rosa knows Slow, but at least there are options for other people to use it.



The other two chests have Phoenix Downs in them.



As you can see, I still haven't remember how to get to those Elixirs. I'm not very good at remembering all of the secret passages.





On the next floor, we immediately see a door.



It leads to a save point.



See? Save point. As could be expected by now, there is another secret passage in here.





Monsters? Oh, Lord!

With 1,950 HP and a weakness to Ice, these guys are more of a joke by this point.



I can't even remember if we've fought these guys before. They're pretty bland and boring.



Remember the Blood Lance?



This sucks nearly as bad. It also has -5 to all stats, which is better than the -10 that the Blood Lance had, but it still blows. At least it's worth some good cash.



Even though we're at a save point, we're not quite done with this update. We're almost done with the cave, though, so let's finish it off.



I feel disappointed in finding a Gold Needle. Usually, fights don't last long enough for petrification to be a major concern.



Heading north through the cave, we find...



...A battle happening between two men.



This is the Prince of Eblan.



And this jerk with style is Rubicante, the final of the Elemental Lords.



His real name is Edward Geraldine, so he shares a name with the lameass prince of Damcyan. But his original name was Gilbert, so it's okay, in a weird way.



Rubicante is fucking cold, too, despite being the Lord of Fire.





A battle begins!



Edge uses katanas as his weapons; he dual-wields, just as Leave did, but he doesn't have Leave's massive strength.



He's fast as hell, though. As you can see, his HP isn't all that great, nor is his damage, but in most fights, he'll be going first.



He also has access to some magic of his own.



I'm telling you all of this because Edge is our next party member. I'm sure you're all very surprised.



That Flame attack healed Rubicante for 180 HP, by the way. Edge is a fucking moron, too.



Just to drive home the point of how stupid it is to use Fire against Rubicante, he's going to give Edge a free demonstration of just how to properly utilize Fire.



He opens his cloak and unleashes Scorch, which I'm pretty sure is just a fiery tornado of death.



Oh, Christ! Rubicante is much better at Fire-usage than you are, Edge!



Within a minute of meeting him, Edge has been knocked the fuck out.





You might think this is Rubicante being an asshole, but it's not. This is not sass or sarcasm on Rubicante's part.





Rubicante turns himself into a small burst of fire...



...And shoots off.



Incredibly, Edge drags himself to his feet.



And the idiot is ready for round two of getting his shit pushed in.



Edge, if he came back right now, Rubicante would just then be poking a dead body with a stick.



Oh, I'm sure he's perfectly okay, Cecil. Fiery tornadoes aren't all that deadly.



I can believe it.





I'm sure you'll do a bang-up job taking him down, too, judging by this performance. I bet you just let him win, didn't you?



See, even Bowser agrees with me!





Yep.



I wouldn't brag about being the rightful heir to a cave full of ninjas.

...Okay, that's a lie. I would totally brag about that, because that's how the McNinjas live and that's fucking awesome.



Psh, no you can't. I bet you're not even carrying any Hi-Potions!



Kim, of all people, steps in to yell at the fool.



Rosa and Bowser can't believe it, either.



She doesn't even know this man, but knowing that he's just rushing off to his death is too much for her. There have been so many lives lost already.



And she can't stand to lose any more lives.











: somehow we must recover the Crystals.



Edge might be an idiot, but at least he can recognize that maybe he won't get the shit beat out of him next time he meets Rubicante. Also, I feel bad, because that sounds exactly like something I'd say.





Bwahahaha! Rosa doesn't even give him a high level Cure spell.



: Alright, let's do this!



Kim's already regretting letting this idiot live. I love Kim.



And here is Leave's replacement.



I give him the Boomerang to begin with, as it'll let me put him in the back row and he can still deal full damage, even with the Kunai equipped. He's fairly fragile, almost as bad as Kim, so keeping him in back is a good idea. His incredible speed can be put to use in throwing damage around, softening enemies up for Bowser, Cecil or Kim to finish off.



His magic is called Ninjutsu, and he only has one spell right now. Flame isn't very powerful and I can't think of many situations in which to use it above Fira or Ifrit.



Anyways, this is where we'll end this update.





Next time, on Final Fantasy IV, let's get back to the Tower of Babel. Stay tuned!



VOTING TIME

Alright, we just got a new character. Edge will be sticking around for the rest of the game and like the rest of the characters who join our party, we can give him a new name if we're so inclined. I'll choose which is either my favorite or the most popular one, so BOLD your vote! Also, since I forgot to mention it earlier, we only have SIX CHARACTERS to use!

Voting will end on Monday, so be sure to throw up suggestions!