Part 32: 97% Less Fabulous

Sadly, while Roy soloing the final dungeon is an appealing thought, . And I'm sure I don't need to tell anyone that's not all there's to it, either. So, let's try chapter 22 once more, with a little less over the top slaughter and fabulous posing and a little more "this is what the history books actually say happened."

...Hey, I never said it would be better this time, okay?



So we start out much the same way, because there's only so much I can do with the pre-chapter text boxes. The intro is the same as before; you can review it in the first take if you like.



However, this time we're bringing the full crew and doing all the usual stuff.



Two thirds of the force starts with Roy,



...and the rest in the other corner. I'm not sure why they gave you so few people on this end, but it's not going to matter.

Time to rock.



How do you like my long-range shenanigans?



AAAhahahAAHAHAHA!!!

cough

Sorry, don't know what came over me.



I'd like this a lot more if someone could actually one-round this asshole as well, but as severely wounded as this will leave him, he'll be too busy trying to heal up to silence anyone on the next turn anyway.



And as for the next step of my diabolical plan,



...it involves Saul being Saul, but more importantly,



...Fae and a chest key with three uses left.



Also, I bought a couple of these.



And of course Wolt gets the last pair of boots. I saved them for Roy so he could wreck more face faster the last time we were here, but now, I want them to keep up with each other.



As predicted, he heals up, but not enough to survive the next round of Boltings.



This general is going to keep trying his very best to be useful. It's kind of adorable but also quite sad.



Whoops! That could actually have been a little bit dangerous.

(Only a little, though.)



BYEEEEE.



Fae continues to ignore the general and loot the chests.



Hmmm... eh, might as well, I have more of these.



No magic.

No speed.



I did mention that it was a couple, right?



I had a really clever plan involving shooting guys through walls but only one of them actually gets close enough to let me do it (without wasting longbows) so I'm very sad now.



Last treasure on the left side.



Not a lot of enemies left, either.



Such a strange thing to see.



So anyway, that's three rings on Shanna now. And wouldn't you know it, that makes her con add up to just enough...



...to offset Maltet's weight.





Hahahaha. Ahahahahahahahaha.



She doesn't actually waste a legendary weapon use on that guy though.



Oh, you think you're clever, do you? Well consider the following arguments:

• Jeigan to the face.

Might as well get the last use out of this tome as well.



I forget how many I got but I'm pretty sure it's enough for the rest of the game.



So let me just have some fun.



Oo, shiny. Not sure who's getting this yet, though.



Saul and Dorothy are taking the lower path around to the throne room. They aren't in very much danger.



That strength score.



Fae is done with the chests. Now there's only the dude left.



She decided to crit his ass.



Meanwhile, Marcus breaks out that silver lance he's been holding on to for the entire game.



Adequate.



Then Noah softens up the guy on the switch,



...and Marcus kills him, too.



Give me a moment, things will be happening soonish.



Now we just have to get Roy to the throne room, but first...



...I have one last chest to loot...



...and some enemies to curbstomp.



And that's Fae's level capped... if we had been playing vanilla, but of course that would be very silly of us.



Dorothy is ready to murder this entire group of idiots.



Meanwhile, Marcus enjoys getting to stretch his legs a bit. All these high-level promoted units are reminding him of his youth.



Saul gets shot by the guy up on the wall. Not sure why he went for the silver bow and counter-range when he has a longbow, but oh well, the AI works in mysterious ways.



Same old Saul!



Dorothy has better luck with the enemies on the ground floor. That fucking strength.



The bishops on the very top of the screen come with silence...



...and sleep staves.



It won't take long to deal with them, and then there's only Zephiel and his minions left.



Bishops have a lot of res, though. Flux won't quite cut it.



So Hugh breaks out the nuclear option. Eat science, motherfucker!



Then the whole group heads down to the throne room, but before we can make it all the way...



...our flying death squad has a moment.

!!




What were you thinking, taking a blow for me like that?!

(As with all moments, it's kind of out of place given we've, you know, killed everyone already, but...)

...Even you forget to pay attention to the enemies around you sometimes. Are you all right?

I'm fine... What about you, Zeiss? Aren't you hurt?

It's just a scratch.
Schwarth, your arm is bleeding... Hang on, I'll go get some vulneraries...

Zeiss!

Yeah?

...Thanks for saving me.

You don't need to thank me.


It's no wonder he got angry when I treated him like a child.

And that is their A support! Look forward to even more murder in their future.



Fir gets the final con-booster. I don't have enough to offset Durandal's weight (it's fucking 12 and she's at 8 con with this) but I doubt most of the things she needs a legendary weapon for will be able to double her at 22 effective speed, so it's fine.



And now... Zephiel.



As with the pre-chapter bit, refer to the update before last for the whole dialogue.

Having got this far, I'm... kinda feeling better about Zephiel as a villain than I did at the start, actually. Not that his plan makes sense or anything, but his motivation sort of does. He's not sympathetic, as such, but at least pitiable, as a clearly malfunctioning human being.



Let's end his suffering.



Eight more dudes spawn in when the door opens, four in each starting area. So if you left someone behind for whatever reason, better hope they can handle themselves, I guess.

Aside from them, the throne room holds two each of snipers, druids, heroes, and probably most troublesome, dragons. It's still not very threatening, though; we've dealt with their likes many times before. And as for Zephiel... Oh man, remember when Zephiel was threatening?

...me neither.

Remember when Zephiel needed to script himself a crit in order to one-shot the worst prepromote ever? Because I remember that. Hell, we might have been able to take him back then if only he'd have stuck around and fought. Wouldn't that have saved everyone a whole lot of time and effort?



Something tells me it's not going to be quite that easy this time.



...and of course, there are four spawn points for reinforcements in the throne room, and they'll be spitting out one sniper, druid, berserker, and hero every couple of rounds for many, many rounds.



...they are not very threatening when you know they're there and have people around to deal with them. zero damage effective weapons.



Wolt gets more of the only stat he really cares about at this point for dealing with one of the druids.



...of course the sleep staff shithead is back.



This one only has a spell tome.



Hugh is not impressed.


...now he shows up?



The dragon misses.



Thaaaaat's our Shanna!



Cecilia kills a hero. That's really good, for Cecilia!



Dorothy one-shots dragons without critting these days.



What's this, Good Levels For Prepromotes Day?

...well okay Jerrot isn't a prepromote any more but he's re-promoted which is the same thing shut up okay:



Archers.



I guess "no pain, no gain" is true because that was very painless.

For Zeiss, I mean. I imagine it hurt quite a bit for the archer.



And -



God damn it it's contagious!



But Marcus is a prepromote so he's fine. He handaxes a sniper through a wall for what would have been a pretty good level even before we got rid of Percy.



Killing the final boss bores Roy.

Roy.

Oh, General Cecilia.

Are you tired? Perhaps you should rest.

I can't. We must keep moving.

Rushing forward will only lead us to failure.

I'm not rushing, but we must move as quickly as possible.

Why?

The quicker we move, the more lives will be saved.

...Yes, that's true.

We fight to win this war. But how can we call it a victory with the deaths of so many innocents?

......

Oh, I'm sorry... I didn't mean to talk back to you. Are you cross with me?

Not at all. was too focused on a simple victory. You are already becoming a worthy leader.

Please, enough flattery...
But... hearing it from you is encouraging.

Really? That's nice to hear.

And that's Roy's B support. It's kind of even more inappropriately timed than the last one, but I won't complain because he is going to need it.



More reinforcements.



Saul gets hit... again.



The berserker goes for Chad.



Last time, I had a level 30/15ish Roy to help me finish this.



This time, not so much. He's going to need every advantage he can get, because he's one of the few people we have who can actually harm Mecha-Zephiel.



...I know Bartre isn't going to be one of them.



That's better! We should be able to do some real damage before the guys from below catch up.



Chad... is not going to be one of the people doing it.



But he will do this, just because he can.



So Roy. Roy with both his support partners next to him does two points of damage. He is also the only person who can attack Zephiel and have some chance to evade.

He might be better served with Durandal here, but then he'd have to attack at 1 range and I need that space open, so it's not an option.







...and Zeph whiffs his first swing.



Hugh, armed with Apocalypse, is our biggest damage-dealer, a whole six points per shot.

...of course, Zephiel will two-shot him, guaranteed, so he needs support.



We don't manage enough damage on the first run to put a lasting dent in the man.

This will need to change.



I'm glad I bought so many Physic staves...



Roy's 20% crit chance is quite important for this.



Wolt is down to 1%. We ...probably can't count on him do do much. And his hit rate isn't great either. On the plus side, at least Zephiel can miss him!



Where Wolt shines is in durability, and even a normal heal staff is enough to put him back at full health after eating an Eckesachs hit.



Fae is just durable enough to manage this, and her 85% chance to deal two damage and 15% chance to do six is also important.



Holy shit, she hasn't been that close to death since, like, level 1.



Rescuedropping and mend staves go!







Oh, you are going to regret trying to finish off Hugh.



Lots of healing and holy shit what is that a good Saul level? Something has gone horribly wrong!



Hugh's 4 HP make him an attractive target.



I could have done with more magic for this fight, but it's good you're trying to get less murder-able.



Archers!



Archers are not a threat to Roy.



Slowly wearing him down, even through the throne regen!



But now these guys are going to make a pain of themselves.



That's not helping!

...And of course Zephiel does not miss Wolt. Not once.



To think, if Noah had gained more than three points of magic over 12 levels he might have been able to contribute more than just healing.



Shanna meets the reinforcements head-on.



Marcus helps, too.



To help others is to help oneself.



Almost there!



Fae is entirely safe provided I don't fuck up. Zephiel cannot one-shot her from full health. Meanwhile, that 10% crit chance against Wolt and 4% against Hugh is not fun to look at.



Shanna continues to disappoint her opponents with her lack of dying horribly.



Thank fuck for these dodges! They're not common, but they are so very very nice when they do happen.



Almost done with the new guys.



That's... defensive.



Again?!



And of course Zephiel leaves Hugh's HP in the single digits again just before the others get to act!



The Hero suicides on Chad, who has been reading Shanna's book, How To Make Friends And Disappoint Them Horribly.



Saul does... somewhat better taking care of the berserker. Who has a hammer. All of the berserkers here have hammers, for some reason.



...and... Wait, hold on here, I'm pretty sure you should have gone for Hugh in his squishy 6-HP state! But instead you go for Zeiss, and you hit him. Are you cheating?



That could have been bad



Marcus Jeigans one of the druids outside in the face.



And Jerrot takes the other one. All done on this end!



Zephiel is in the single digits! This is it, people!



GODDAMMIT WOLT



On his last legs, Zephiel goes for Roy.



Roy crits.


But remember this... My will shall never die... As long as humans retain control, madness will reign...



And that was Zephiel.



All we have to do now is wipe out the last generics and we're done!



Might as well kill the staff dudes, too, while I'm at it...



It's worth experience, at least.



I have done a lot of healing in this fight.



You're not done yet? You do know I've killed your boss already, right?



That. Fucking. Strength.

I swear I haven't touched her growths.



Still not done?!



Not the grandest of exits for Chad, but hey, 30 levels made him pretty damn competent.



The fighter-types just love suiciding on Saul.



Bartrecopter!



...and of course the stupid sleep staff shithead managed to hit Shanna on a 7%. What a disappointment.



Marcus, meanwhile, anything but.



Get up!



I... wasn't talking to Marcus' stats, but I'm fine with this anyway.



AAaaaaAAAAA!



But they are promoted, so the exp is good.



...



Get Marcus'd.



We're fini-



It's turn fucking 43, when does it end?!



Speed capped.







...Shanna...



...Zeiss...!



Turn 50. Turn fucking fifty. That's when the reinforcements end.



Screw you guys, I'm going home.





Dun dun dun...?

What?

That'd basically be my reaction to that line, too.

What do you mean?

...followed by that, I guess.

The Dark Priestess is nowhere to be found...

...She must have escaped.



What...? What was that?

Zephiel's sword... it glowed! It's...

Eckesachs... A sword that only the king of Bern can use...

Lord Roy, legend says that when all the legendary weapons come together, the Dragon Sanctuary will rise from the ground!

The word legend no longer means anything.

Legend says that when all the legendary weapons come together, the legendary Dragon Sanctuary will rise from the legendary ground. Legendarily.

The Dragon Sanctuary...

Has anyone but Merlinus ever heard about this before? No one? Okay, all in favour of ignoring this and just going home? ...All of you? Okay, fuck this shit, let's go get drunk.

It was the headquarters and lair of the dragons... That's what the legends say, anyway.

Yes... I've heard that, too.

Does that mean Eckesachs is the final legendary weapon? I thought it was the Binding Blade.

...I do think this comes off kinda as an asspull. They could have mentioned this when we got the Binding Blade...

...The Binding Blade may be on an even higher level than the legendary weapons... It may be its own entity, beyond compare to even the legendary weapons...

More powerful than the legendary weapons...? What power lies in this sword?

It does have 1-2 attack range. That's pretty good, right?

The sword is glowing again!



Will the light lead us to the Dragon Sanctuary?

That is how the stories go.

...If the Dark Priestess is the demon dragon as we suspect... then she is most likely at the sanctuary...

Very well. We follow the light!



I... think this could have been handled better, and since I'm complaining anyway, the last sidequest for Apocalypse wasn't very well timed - it kinda broke up the momentum we got in the last chapter. Skipping it and heading straight through the wyvern brigade and into the castle would have flowed better. But, I guess nothing's perfect. Next time, all new, all exciting, all legendary content! Same legendary time, same legendary channel.





Legend.