Part 179: Prologue: Dry run.

Prologue: Dry run.
June 14, 2025-July 1, 2025

The Confederations Cup is being held in the United States over the latter half of June. A recent invention, the Cup will be the most prestigious international tournament I've coached thus far and will give us an idea of how far we might go come next years World Cup.



We can beat Mexico. We can upset England. We can win this thing.



Of course, saying that we can win isn't quite accurate. Mexico and England are both beasts, and we're liable to face them in a one-two punch come the semi-finals. We shouldn't have trouble getting out of our group, though, while Colombia is a very good side neither Saudi Arabia or Canada are in our league.

vs Canada, June 15, 2025
Confederations Cup, Group A


We're playing before over 100,000 screaming fans in the historic Rose Bowl of Los Angeles California. Who says Americans won't turn out to watch a soccer match? The national team is using a variant of Wrexham's 4-2-3-1 against the inferior opposition our neighbors to the north present.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Rubio de la Fuente, Parsons, Latham, Bruno, Bartlett, Padilla, Woods (c), Fisher, Ulusal, Cowles, Carroll.
Subs: Jimenez, Beer, Stevens, Needham, Garcia, Ramos, Hughes, Burman, Helmick, Moctezuma, Celeste.

We have the better of the first half but it's still tied. So it's a massive relief when we score 14 seconds into the second half on a screamer from the wing. We're even better in the second half, and that allows me a chance to give sixteen year old Rodrigo Moctezuma his first senior team cap. We're well on our way to securing our place in the knockout round until Latham scores an own goal three minutes into stoppage time. We have to settle for a draw. This is not the first time America's hat has screwed us, they've played us tough at every damned level since I took over as head coach of the national team.

Man of the Match: Seth Cowles




USMNT 1-1 Canada



The prior record holder was megabust Freddy Adu, a wunderkind who was supposed to be America's first world class player and who was playing pro soccer as a 14 year old. Today Adu can't even find a spot on third rate Serbian squads. It's almost impossible for Moctezuma to end up a bigger disappointment.



I don't have time for this. I wish the Director of Football feature wasn't so buggy, offloading tertiary youth prospects for low to mid seven figure sums is the perfect job for one.



Crud, I think we're still going to be a second seed. All eight clubs above us are in the Champions League next season.



I know this comes as a surprise, especially as six months ago I was saying that he was one of the top five goalkeepers worldwide and Manchester United are our bitter rival. But have faith, there's a method to my madness.



You're going to have a tough enough time with 11 men on the pitch, Tahiti. I wouldn't be so eager to earn red cards. As for Mexico, I bet they wish they were the ones playing at the Rose Bowl instead of in the Meadowlands. Matches in Southern California are basically home games for El Tri, which is why the US so often prefers to play their bitter rivals in places like Ohio.




His deal runs through 2028; I'd like to get one more year out of him on his bargain basement contract of £19,000/wk before he starts getting paid what he deserves.



I should have sold him last summer, my lack of faith in Thiago cost us £10m. Now I know Thiago is amazing, and if he slumps or gets hurt I have complete faith that Stringel will be amazing. We have no need for Aarts, who is very good but wasted on our club.

vs Colombia, June 18, 2025
Confederations Cup, Group A


We're taking on Colombia in the home of the New York Giants and Jets, despite being in the Meadowlands, New Jersey. The Copa America winners are our toughest challenge in the group stage, a win or a draw here will almost certainly advance us. They are also sitting on one point after a 2-2 draw with the Saudis. Mauricio Bohoroquez, Meteor's rival for title of “Best left winger in the world” is playing and will be their biggest threat.

Starting Formation: 4-5-1 Counter
Starting 11: Beer, Parsons, Needham, Stevens, Bruno (c), Padilla, Ramos, Garcia, Burman, Celeste, Moctezuma.
Subs: Jimenez, Rubio de la Fuente, Ramirez, Latham, Woods, Ulusal, Hughes, Cowles, Fisher, Hemick, Carroll.

We have Colombia on the ropes early but we just can't seem to put them away. They recover from our early pressure, and seem to take the lead in the 35th minute but for the referee's whistle blowing play dead. It's the only time the ball hits the back of the net all day and it doesn't even count. We're sitting on two points, and we need a win against Saudi Arabia if we're to meet my minimum expectations for the tournament.




USMNT 0-0 Colombia



They may be satisfied, but I'm not.



Nor are the players.



You're presented with more opportunities to hold team meetings as an international coach, and a good rousing speech is exactly what the team needs to hear. I don't let them speak, I don't want to damage the afterglow of my rendition of Bluto's speech from Animal House.



The renovation of Wrexham continues. One of Taffarel or Cirjak was going, as I expect great things of Loseille next season. We have now sold £139.5m of players in the past month. More will come.



I hate scheduling friendlies. They're allegedly improving this in the coming iteration, along with the other eleventy-dozen additional features that will supposedly make the game worth my hard earned entertainment budget... Who am I kidding, of course I'm going to buy FM15.



It's the end of an era. Godspeed, you bastard. I respect you for going out after your greatest accomplishment, denying me my third title in a row in the final minutes of the season.



Screw having home grown players. We're going full Manchester City. I don't care if it means that we only register 22 players for Champions League matches. If you're not good enough to hold down a first team spot, I'm not keeping you around.

vs Saudi Arabia, June 21, 2025
Confederations Cup, Group A


We need to win to advance. A draw will leave us on three points and on the outside looking in. This is not where I expected to be at this point in the group.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Rubio de la Fuentes, Parsons, Latham, Needham, Bartlett, Woods (c), Hughes, Fisher, Ulusal, Cowles, Carroll.
Subs: Jimenez, Beer, Bruno, Stevens, Ramirez, Padilla, Garcia, Celeste, Burman, Helmick, Moctezuma.

Carroll puts us on top after a pretty bit of passing and movement to round the keeper at 27 minutes. We're able to make it two-nil before the break from a corner. Only a brilliant save by the Saudi keeper prevents us from going up three when play resumes, and allows them to pull back within one a few minutes later. But then a rough tackle gets one of their defenders sent off with 20 minutes to play, and then his partner gives up a penalty and is also sent off two minutes later. After fighting back from down 2-0 to being within a shout, they're suddenly down two goals again and with only nine men on the pitch. We can't help but score against nine men, and our margin of victory gives us first place in the group. Bring on Mexico.

Man of the Match: Seth Cowles




USMNT 4-1 Saudi Arabia



Unlike the Confederations Cup, I aim to win this tournament come hell or high water. For now, though, Paul Williams will run them through their paces in a few friendlies to build esprit de corps and match fitness.



For now, though, Paul Williams will run them through their paces in a few friendlies to build esprit de corps and match fitness. I picked the local clubs based upon where I have friends I haven't seen in a couple years... I'm sure USSF won't mind me blowing off practice to see them.



Finally! After years of dreaming and scheming and plotting, I have my man!

Kôjirô Minami
Goalkeeper


The best keeper in the world now wears Wrexham colors. He's better than Kovacevic in almost every way. He's wildly better in the air. He's better at controlling the box and communicating with his defense. He's got hands the size of a grizzly's paw, and they seem like they have super glue on them. He's got a better feel for the game. The single area where Kovacevic outstrips him is in making the safe play. He's even the same age as Kovacevic, so he's by no means past his prime. Oh, and his fame helps pay his way:



We have a couple players who might claim to be the best at their position in the world, but all of them reached those heights after joining Wrexham. Minami is the first signing who was hands down the best at his position before joining us.




Aww, dangit. We clearly need to win more trophies to become the biggest club in the world.




I loathe PSG. They regularly make bids for my players, which invariably leads to the targeted player moping when I refuse to deal. Yet we've been vastly more successful in the past five years than those upjumped playthings of a princeling, so when they come complaining to me about how I won't let them leave I find it hard to take them seriously. We all know what this is really about, and it has nothing to do with wanting to win. It's that they'd double Reeds wages.



The one decent opponent I could find for us to play in China pulls out. I don't get the point of training in a foreign country if the only teams the locals can see us play are amateurs.



I'd have been stunned if it was anyone else. There aren't many players who manage forty or more goals in a season who aren't named Messi or Ronaldo. Messi, btw, holds the all time record with 73 goals in a single season, 50 of which came in the 2011-2012 La Liga season.




The club's Best Eleven doesn't see anyone new crack the starting lineup. The number of appearances also seems a bit off, Justin Bailey's played in 272 league games for the club and made 352 total appearances. Meteor's made 340 total appearances, 259 of them in League Play. So who knows what's up with that.



What sort of gauntlet do we face at the end of the season?




Oh. That's... not bad at all. Other than that final match against Chelsea we get all of our megabastard opponents out of the way by the first week of February. We shouldn't have any problem keeping our best players rested and ready for our Champions League and FA Cup matches as we close in on the end of the season.



I promised you trophies. I failed to deliver. I will not fail again.



Well crap. Getting past Mexico just got harder. Carroll is one of the four or five best American players, and easily the best striker.

vs Mexico, June 25, 2025
Confederations Cup, Semifinal Round


A win here sets up a final against England or Colombia. Making the final is my goal. We've got home field advantage here in New Jersey, hopefully the crowd can cheer us to a victory.

Starting Formation: 4-5-1 Counter
Starting 11: Rubio de la Fuentes, Parsons, Needham, Latham, Bruno, Woods (c), Ramos, Ulusal, Burman, Cowles, Moctezuma.
Subs: Jimenez, Beer, Bartlett, Ramirez, Stevens, Padilla, Hughes, Garcia, Fisher, Helmick, Celeste.

Mexico gives us a hiding. We're lucky to still be in the match at halftime, and even luckier when Brian Burman makes a blazing run down the flank and launches a cruise missile into the upper 90 of the far post in the 70th minute. Mexico redoubles it's efforts from that point on, but we stand fast and hold on for the smash and grab win. We had no right to advance to the finals over Mexico, but we're the ones playing for the trophy. Hey, maybe if we're really lucky Colombia will shock England and we'll have a glimmer of hope in the final!

Man of the Match: Brian Burman




USMNT 1-0 Mexico



So much for that glimmer of hope.



We signed Allan, Fitzgerald, and Gabbianelli on free transfers two summers ago. Allan looks like he'll be a solid backup for the club, while Fitz and Gabbianelli each brought us eight figure sums upon departure. I am the Billy Beane of European football.



This kid, meanwhile, just can't take the hint that I'm trying to cash in on him.



That's what I like to see. Now to repeat it against Mexico's B team in two weeks.



Yeah. End of the road.



The boys ain't feeling it, either. I can't make much of an impact on their mood seeing as they're aware of just how hard this is going to be.

vs England, June 29, 2025
Confederations Cup, Final Round


We've now made it as far as any American team in past Confederations Cups. The 2009 edition saw the Stars and Stripes race out to a two-nil lead over Brazil, after a semifinal where they handed Spain its first loss in 35 international matches. The USMNT lost against Brazil that day, so if we can somehow do them one better it'll be a banner accomplishment for the nation.

Starting Formation: 4-5-1 Counter
Starting 11: Rubio de la Fuente, Parsons, Bruno, Latham, Bartlett, Woods (c), Padilla, Ramos, Fisher, Ulusal, Celeste.
Subs: Jimenez, Beer, Ramirez, Needham, Stevens, Hughes, Garcia, Burman, Cowles, Helmick, Moctezuma.

We had as much chance as a heifer in a slaughterhouse. From the very start England put on a masterclass of possession and attacking movement, and showed just how far we have to go before we can even consider winning the World Cup. Steve Collecott scored in the third minute, and even with that early lead they never showed an inch of mercy. We went into the break down two, and it's a miracle that we kept the score from getting embarrassing after the break. We didn't have a shot on goal all day, while England had eleven.

Sometimes you eat the bear, and, well, sometimes the bear... it eats you.




USMNT 0-2 England



We have got to start raising our sights higher. We shouldn't be happy with the way we were just run off the field.



But our performance was still considered impressive, largely based upon the flawed FIFA rankings that put us just ahead of Saudi Arabia and behind Algeria going into the tournament. Also, what was anyone expecting of Canada? To get to the semifinal over us, Saudi Arabia, and Colombia?




The trip to the final also improves my job security. While I was at no risk of being fired, the game hasn't been taking into account my work in the Olympics or with the U20 team, and won't be paying attention to how we do in the Gold Cup. So this has been their first chance to rate my performance since the Gold Cup two years prior.



That's going to be a little hard when we don't have another meaningful match until the actual World Cup in 346 days.



It's going to be even harder with our captain and midfield stalwart retiring! What the hell, man? You couldn't stick it out for one more damned year and play in the World Cup in front of your countrymen?!

USMNT



We're not even close to a world class team yet. Our matches against Mexico and England proved that. We were lucky to get past one, and lucky to only lose by two to the other. The World Cup is only a year away, and I'm having to calibrate down my goals from reaching the quarterfinal at bare minimum to merely getting to the knockout stage. Worse, we've lost by far and away our best player, who decided to retire now at age 31. Now I know how Jurgen Klinsmann felt when Landon Donovan faffed off. We'll get to see how deep the national talent pool is come July in the Gold Cup, after falling short against admittedly stiff competition in the Confederations Cup I want to make sure we take home a trophy for the third straight summer under my reign.

Wrexham


We had more trouble scheduling our pre-season than I'd have liked, but we have enough matches to make sure that we're locked and loaded for the season start. It's vital that we get off on the right foot, last season proved that even minor wobbles can have catastrophic effects down the line.