Part 33
So you say this happens all the time?
Often enough that aspiring pilots are formally taught about it, sir.
Gotta say, I was not expecting to let a space beast stick its tongue down my exhaust pipe today. Or ever.
Oh, I don't imagine he's using the exhaust, sir.
...
Much more efficient to go straight for the pump, sir.
You know, shit like that goes right over your head every time and it's just so adorable. I am totally gonna pinch your cheeks one of these days.
Tark'la! Look outside!
Aww. Isn't that sweet?
Oh yeah. Real romantic. That just brings a tear to my eye, no joke.
You wouldn't know romance if it slapped you in the face. Look at them out there. They look so happy toge-
*gurgle*
Oh dear lord!
OH GOD OH FUCK WHAT THE FUCK IS HE DOING AAAAAAAAAAAA
Floor it! Floor it!
Very good, sir.
Alright. Let's see what glorious bounties await us here.
Hey, uh, we got a couple of days, if you guys wanna take another break.
Oh, would that be alright, sir? Thank you, sir. I'll see you later then, sir.
...not like him to be in such a hurry.
People act weird sometimes.
...
...
Something is up.
What?
I dunno. Something. Marketplace cleaned out right before we arrive? Twice in a row, by the same two companies?
...you can't seriously think they're doing this just to bring us down.
Why not? You remember what Mr. Starving Children said. We're doing well, and people know it. Sooner or later the competition was gonna start getting worried.
...
It's really not that difficult to believe, dude.
It just seems so sudden. It wasn't that long ago that we had no idea what we were doing. Now people are teaming up to eliminate us? I can't get my head around it.
Yeah, well. Maybe it's just a coincidence, but with this and us getting outbid by one kubar last week...
Nah. They're out to get us. And I don't think they're playing fair either.
So what are we going to do?
...
I got a couple of ideas.
Sirs? Do you have a moment?
Sure. Everything alright? How's Loro treating you?
Oh, quite well, sir. Quite well. It certainly wouldn't be worth complaining, sir.
Good, good.
So. Uh. What's up?
It's rather embarrassing, sir. I'm afraid I seem to be in prison, sir.
What? What happened?
I had a...a disagreement with some gentlemen in a bar, sir. They made several remarks that I found rather distasteful, sir, and one thing led to another, and...
Whoa, whoa. You got into a fight? You did?
I'm afraid so, sir.
My god. Are you alright?
Oh, I'm perfectly well, sir. Unfortunately, the other participants are not. Therein lies the problem, sir.
By anyone's account, I am the aggressor in this situation, sirs. I am guilty of assault and will have to be detained until it is time for me to stand trial. Under other circumstances I wouldn't ask, but I will be quite unable to work for you unless my bail is posted, sirs.
Also, there is another gentleman in my cell who says he can't wait for me to drop the soap, sirs.
...
I'm not entirely sure what he means by that, sirs.
We'll be right over.
I truly can't apologise enough, sirs. I don't know what came over me.
Hey, don't worry about it. If I had a girlfriend, I sure as hell wouldn't let some punks talk shit about her.
I...I don't recall divulging any such details, sir.
What? Girlfriend? When was this?
Maybe not, but you weren't doing a great job of hiding it. And I don't think there's much else that'd set you off like that.
...I suppose not, sir.
When did you get a girlfriend?
You don't think she'll see me as a brute now, do you sir?
I dunno. Depends on how out of line those guys were.
Thoroughly, sir.
I wouldn't worry about it, then. It's chivalry, right? Defending her honour and all that. Ladies love that stuff.
I hope you're right, sir.
pilooooot i am curious about your personal life
Welcome again, everyone. I'm particularly surprised to see you here, Mr. Vandergriff. Am I to take it that your flagrant act of sabotage was unintentional?
...what the hell's that supposed to mean?
I understand that you outbid Slev, Tark'la & Sons on the recent ship auction.
Yeah. That's what you told me to do.
I did not tell you to outbid them by a single kubar, Mr. Vandergriff. Do you have any idea how much suspicion you've raised? Rumours of foul play abound. Already there is talk of an investigation being launched.
...
Do try to make it less obvious in the next auction, will you? Either that or allow Mr. Puffer to handle it.
Like hell. I wouldn't trust that boy to buy a stick o' bubblegum.
'Scuse me. I am actually sitting here. Next to you.
Look. Son. I don't wanna hurt yer feelings none, but, well...do you watch the news at all?
...
why
why would they say that
that's really mean
And how go your efforts, Mr. Roke? Mr. Gizzy?
Um. Okay, I guess.
"You guess"?
Are we getting the goods before they do? Yes. Are we making money? No.
Then I fail to see the problem. We are all making sacrifices to deal with this issue, gentlemen. Once Slev, Tark'la & Sons is no longer a threat, then we can turn our attention back to our own development.
Sacrifices? We're giving up our profits to bleed them of goods. Vandergriff and Puffer are losing money overbidding on auctions. What sacrifices are you making here?
It is at great risk to myself that I am providing you with information on their movements. I assumed that much would be obvious.
Hey Hoff. Can you provide any information on THIS movement?
I'm flipping you off.
I can see that, yes.
Can I work with someone else? I want to work with someone else.
why would anyone even do a survey like that