Part 40

Again?! What the hell is wrong with this thing?!
This is most peculiar, sir. I've never heard of a ship failing so soon after being seen to by a repair droid, sir.
So we're having shitty luck. Tell me something I don't know.
I'm saying that perhaps these have not been accidents, sir.
...what?
Consider the situation, sir. Two freak breakdowns over a very short space of time, sir. Our scanners glitching at critical moments, causing us to fly headlong into hazards. Rival companies that are all too eager to eliminate competition. And, as we have seen, they are not above using underhanded methods.
You think we're being sabotaged?
I suppose it could merely have been an unfortunate set of coincidences, sir.
Yeah, and I might be a space whale. Have the crew do a full sweep of the ship. If anyone or anything looks iffy, I want to know about it.
Right away, sir.
And send for another repair droid.
Yes, sir.
And tell our insurance agent he might wanna pop some Valium or something.



Or he could also do that, I guess.





They have begun to suspect, then?
Yep.
Very well. Withdraw at the next opportunity.
...
I would say we've done quite enough damage already, wouldn't you?
...
Brow? Do you read m...
Ah.
Goodbye.
If you could just put your hands over your head and step into the open.
In your own time, sir.





...not on the passenger list, sirs, and he was obviously trying to remain out of sight. I also recall him boarding the ship under rather unusual circumstances in the past. I'm convinced that this is the culprit, sirs.
Was he doing anything when you caught him?
He appeared to be using a personal communicator, sir. I'm afraid I don't know whom he was conversing with.
I'm sure the police will be able to find out.
To hell with that. We're finding out right now. Who are you working for, eyebrows?
...
You've been screwing around with our ship. You put my life, and my friends' lives in danger. You think I'm gonna let you away with that? Tell me who you're working for and maybe we'll drop you off somewhere with an atmosphere.
...
LISTEN TO ME YOU SON OF A BITCH
I AM THE STORM OF RETRIBUTION
Alright, let's not get carried away.
"Carried away"? Do you realise how much this bastard's cost us?
It'll cost us even more if he can charge you with assault.






Fine.
The authorities will be here shortly, sir. Our intruder should be in custody before the repairs are complete.
Good. Thanks, pilot. We owe you for this.
Not at all, sir.
Is it assault to throw jelly beans at someone?
...I don't think so?
Go get some jelly beans.
_{gonna bean the fuck out of him}





Galaxy Police. I believe you reported a trespasser on board?

Ah. Him.
Take him in, lads. Let's see if he can worm his way out of this one.
You know him?
Oh yes. Very well. We've been trying to get something to stick to this scumbag for a long time, and here you go catching him red-handed. If this all goes smoothly, I think Kukubia might just owe you folks a debt.
A debt?
Yes.
As in a money debt?
As in you will receive a plaque.
...
Possibly it will have some gold leaf on it. I'm not sure. I'll ask.





Whoa. I'll take that, actually.
...
Man, that dude must have really pissed in the Emperor's cereal. Soaked the damn table, even.
...
What's the matter?
I kind of wanted a plaque.






I made space for it and everything.
Tell you what. I'll make one for us. "Slev and Tark'la, two guys who happen to employ a pilot who happened to find a dangerous criminal on their ship. Commemorandum in metal platus. Est."
...
It's ancient Goggian.
I don't think it is.







Hey, look. Plenty to fill our ship with here.
Yeah.
Good price on Exotic, too. We should definitely grab some of that.
Yeah. Let's do that.
...do I detect discontent?
Look, it's great that eyebrows is out of our hair and all, but we're still down about four hundred grand here, tax break or not. And I hate to say it, but a lot of that was from selling oxygen to you-know-who.
It's gonna be a long-ass slog to get back to where we were. If we get back. That gives other folks a lot of time to pull ahead of us, and if they do that then they can go right back to kicking us around and making sure we get nowhere.
Not trying to be a killjoy here, but we have to accept that this might have screwed us.
...
You're supposed to be all devil-may-care. *I* do the pessimism thing. What happened?
Shit happened.



Incoming transmission, sirs.



Uh.
I don't see anything.
It'll work. It's just a bit old. Give it a minute.






Well?
When I say "a minute", I actually mean, like, sixty seconds.












Hooooo.













There we go.
Slev, Tark'la and Sons? I'm Mr. Gizzy of Gizzy Shipping. This is Mr. Roke of Roke Transport and Puffer of Puffer Inc.
Mister Puffer.
Puffer of Mister Puffer Inc.
that's a dumb name for a company dude
Anyway. The three of us just had a little business meeting, and I think we've all come to the same conclusion.
We'd like to make a deal.