Part 5: Gond But Not ForgottenUpdate 5: Gond But Not Forgotten
Gond approximates the golden ratio although it is in fact made of mud and dung and rocks and bones and not gold at all.
Well looky there at you! Last time we changed our title to something less redundant, wrecked havoc on hordettes of barbarians, and have once again found our neighbours whom we are super sure we will not kill and consume.
7-Civilization 2 - Mongol Horde
See? They're still there. We haven't murdered them even a little bit although such is surely within the ludicrous killing capacity of our bipedal massacre machine.
Hello! Let's just ignore your freakish mammalian appearance for the rest of the game, we used up this LP's entire SFX budget on Varakara.
Wow! And nobody died! Let's exchange views, friend.
You are the second person to say this in the last twenty million years. Do you know what happened to the first?
Where'd YOU come from?
And why are you trying to sell me something I'm already learning? I don't even know what barter IS yet and I'm positive this is a lousy trade.
This, on the other hand? I like.
Oh so THAT'S what happened. Looks like everyone met up at once here.
And it's pretty obvious who benefitted from it. Yeah, I wonder how we ended up at the top of that list? Moral learned kids: bribes work.
Speaking of work, our noble fish,
We will continue to head east, although some of us will follow slower than others stupid fat legs.
Civilization 2 - Funeral March
Wow. We just made two new friends and didn't kill them even a LITTLE and now one of them's gone and eaten the other. We're going to have to try to be a good influence on the Fensaliri and stop them from falling off the wagon again.
In the meantime, we've our own to tend to. Moira, our precious li'l breadbasket, is pumping out some future infrastructure for us.
And we've just figured out how to exchange things WITHOUT eating the other person. We're already on track for the whole role model thing.
No. Teeth can be used to bite. To gnash. To chew and slash and smash. We are going to learn how to pick flowers and hold them gently in our mouths.
Our fish flails onwards. Quite a sizable landmass it's stumbled across here on the far side of the world. What lurks in its depths?
Though there's plenty still unknown nearer to home, too. Where the hell did the Fensaliri come from?
Yes, good little Maiasaura. You are not going to be a city, not yet. You are a builder, a fixer. You can smack down a full square of road in a single turn and now that our northern highway's complete you've got a bigger project.
We found one of these in a hut it won't stop beating.
Thrut is dead. Long live not-Thrut.
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No, I don't know what that crane was doing there either.
Ah! A scouting Oviraptor finds life in the far north. Fish: the first sign of new friends. Where shall we find them? What wonders will they show us? Will they bribe us? How will we
Oh shit I left the Maiasaura faucet on.
Ah jeez. LOOK at that maintenance; Moira's pounding out the food and even it can barely keep growing with this level of upkeep. We're going to have to sink this little sucker into a city, and fast.
Meanwhile, the east awaits. Although the Fensaliri still don't.
Also, this Brachiosaurus is super good at making friends. I guess they come easily when you're the size of a small hill.
We will teach them to gather. To gather and to share. We are foragers, we are cooperators, we are collectivists, we are peaceful and lovely and light upon the world and all its creations, alive or not.
And we are about to put price tags on all of them.
Oh. Well what's one more hordette going to
Oh, right. Oviraptors.
Ah! Our landscaping Maiasaura has arrived. And just in time.
Listen, Gond is great. Gond is good. Gond is just fine...
But Gond could be better. So we're going to irrigate the crap out of it and have the resulting population surge jumpstart its ecgondomy.
Baby steps, Gond. Baby steps.
NEXT TIME: FRIENDSHIP, PERSONAL SPACE, FREE LOVE, BABIES STEPPING.