Part 31: Episode 31: Approaching Shadows

Episode 31: Approaching Shadows

Ooh, scary.
N-Neptune, goodness, don’t startle me like that. Shouldn’t you be in bed?
That sounds really boring, even more boring than doing one of these things. Last time, you guys totally beat up that robot dude and saved us. Now, on Neptune…



Also good job, Nep jr. Way to totally beat up the bad guy and all that.



Where’s Blanc?
We gotta lotta stuff to talk about!
That’s absolutely right. It’s been three years since we siblings last met. Are you trying to get between me and Vert?
Please calm down. Especially you, Chika. Everyone needs time to rest.
The CPUs must regain their strength as soon as possible.
Now, kids… Let’s let big sis Blanc get some rest. We don’t want her cranky, right?
A nation’s Oracle shouldn’t go into hysterics at the drop of a hat. You’re setting a bad precedent.
Grr…I know that! We just have to wait for a little bit, right? Maybe I’ll rest with Vert…
What do we do now, Histoire?
Once the CPUs have recovered, I will officially sanction the mission to eliminate all of ASIC.
This will prevent Arfoire’s revival.
Now that you mention it, are they planning to bring her back soon?
Due to your efforts to reclaim a portion of Gamindustri’s shares, I am certain it will delay their plans. Yet…
That was long ago. Time may be running out.
We should hurry.
No use rushing when we’re not at full strength. We need the CPUs.
Iffy’s right. Let’s wait for them to get their beauty sleep.
You must all be exhausted as well. Please go and take a long rest whi-

It really sucks not being the main character this time, but at least it means I get to take a breather for a while.



I feel like I’m on a boat…urp…
Could this tremor originate from the Gamindustri Graveyard? What could be happening?
It’s settled down, but I’m still wound up.
Gust has only bad feelings about this.
Do you want us to go take a look?
But…everyone should be resting, and…
It’s fine, I’m not tired or anything. Waiting around here will probably tire me out more than going to check.
Don’t forget about us, right, Rom?
I’m worried.
If they’re all willing to check, I don’t see a reason to keep them here.
Fine. Please remain alert. We do not know what this could be.

Speaking of, I’m glad to see you guys aren’t working too hard.
Wh-What? Goodness.



Thanks for the hard work, Histy.
What are you doing here, Neptune?
Yikes, that chilled me to my bones. I was just hangin’ out until you finished workin’ and stuff.
You were waiting for me?
Well, yeah. You’re always so busy. I haven’t gotten to talk to ya since I got back, y’know?
I apologize, but should your time not be spent with Nepgear instead?
I was already all like ‘Hey, I’m back!’ to Nep Jr. I didn’t get the chance to say howdy-doody to you yet.
So, uh, heya!
Welcome home, Neptune.
Thanks, hehe. Sorry I worried you.
I’m gonna go stir up some crazy trouble, but once everything gets back to normal-bormal, let’s relax with Nep Jr.
Yes. I look forward to that day.

Also, what do you mean by crazy trouble?



Excellent, my stomach has been waiting for this!
I’m very hungry.
Oh, let me help serve the food.
I’m glad Compa’s on our side. It’s great we can eat like this even when we’re on the road.
Yes, I was surprised at how delicious Compa’s cooking is. It hits all the right notes!
Teehee. Are you buttering me up?
I think it’s more surprising that Compa is the only girl here who can cook a decent meal.
Um, IF, you can’t cook, either.
I don’t need to. I’m the breadwinner. I live to work.
I have lots of work as alchemist.
I’m a pop star, so…
The heroine of justice subsists solely on the crushed dreams of evil!
That doesn’t sound nutritious…
All right, everyone. The food will get cold if we keep talking.
Yeah, I’m gonna dig in.
Mmmm. It’s as tasty as ever.
Nomnomnom… Compa would be a good housewife.

Oh, nothing. Also, what’s up with that weird conversation you guys had in the Basilicom earlier?
Y-You were listening? Also, don’t change the subject.



Allow me to become your husband!
…Stupid.
I’d want a wife like Compa, too. It’d be easy to write songs about her.
…Dammit all.
No, no. I will take her. Gust will shower her with devotion.
S-Stop this stupid debate, everyone! Can’t you see that Compa’s all mine!?
…
…
…
…
Tch, crap! N-No! What I meant to say was…
Oh, dear. Iffy, you really are…
The heroine’s closet has creaked open.
Lovey-dovey.
I honestly didn’t suspect at all…
U-Um, well…please invite me to sing at your wedding…
D-Dammit! I’m trying to tell you that isn’t what I meant to say!

What? I don’t even remember what I said.



* pant, pant * No good. My body’s not keeping up with what my mind wants it to do. I must train even harder.
I should get back or they’ll suspect me. If they catch me, it’ll be trouble.
Would you like a towel? You’re sweating up a storm.
Oh, thanks.
You’re very welcome.
…
…
What the-!? Why’re you here!?
I couldn’t find you, so I went on a little womanhunt.
Then I saw you training really hard. I decided not to interrupt you and so I waited until you finished up.
Um, so…you saw the whole thing?
Yes, I sure did. You’re admirable, IF. I really should learn from your example.
I don’t think you need to train alone.
Huh? Why’s that?
I’m glad you’re ready and willing to become stronger and all, but…
If you get too tough, I won’t stand out in battle sequences, you know?

You’re always like this! You should take things more seriously!



I knew you’d say that, but…you know…You’re a lot stronger than me.
What? Goodness, no! My biceps are still really tiny.
That’s not it. You’re tough. It’s the reason I’m training myself.
I don’t want to be worthless like three years ago.
What? I think I zoned out.
Nothing. Anyway, I’m banning you from all personal training until I become an insanely tough super soldier. Okay?
Why? Aww, goodness, that’s no fair.
It’s completely fair. Them’s the breaks, kiddo.
Awwwww, maaaaaan…

What? I’m super serious!



Oh, right! I should look through the e-mails I’ll read during the broadcast.
Whoa, there’s a lot more than usual. I guess I’ll start at the top.
Radio alias… ‘Goodness, my real name’s just fine. This is Nepgear.’
‘Good luck on your broadcast today. I’m constantly clicking refresh on my PC browser until I hear your voice.’
That’s nice and all, but I doubt she’ll really keep hitting refresh until the broadcast is all done and uploaded.
Next one…
Radio alias… ‘A gust of wind in the fields of torment and shrouded in a cloak of darkness.’
Wow, I’ll just stop there. People with those kinds of comments almost always have painful things to say.
What about this one? ‘Gust of reasonable pricing, abundant quality, and sleight-of-hand alchemy.’
‘If there’s an item in need, I’ll synthesize it, indeed! Please let me know!’
Just an advertisement. If I read this on-air, my sponsor would be mad.
Next…no alias…
‘The two of us made some art! We’re confident in its artistry.’
Children’s drawings? A nice gesture and all, but I can’t show people anything on a radio program.
Aw, man. No decent e-mail. What about this one?
Radio alias is ‘I LUV Vert.’
‘If you have the time to do a stupid radio broadcast, go save my darling Vert already, you timid little woman.’
Chika, please, don’t send hate mail.
Oh, whoops! Is it time to start?
I haven’t even picked out any good e-mails to read! Uh-oh, I have to hurry!

And you totally went off to play video games when you should be going to that graveyard thingy.



Oh, a game arcade. Maybe I’ll play a little. Wait, is that…Cave?
Cave!
Ah, this is a delightful coincidence. I am surprised to see you here.
Yes, I’m probably more surprised. I never imagined you’d spend time in a game arcade.
Is that so? I frequent this place when I have excess time.
Really? I’m sorry, then. I didn’t mean to interrupt your valuable free time playing games.
There is no need to feel such a way. I am quite adept at this diversion.
Oh, you’ve played it a lot? What kind of game is this? Wow, a shoot ‘em up. Looks classic.
While some would classify this as retro, it remains quite popular.
This was perfect timing. I must go and purchase some rations. Can you take over for a while?
What? I’ve never played it before.
It is nothing to be concerned about. Just entertain yourself with it while I am away for a moment.
Sure, but I mean… She’s gone. Wh-What should I do?

N-Not on purpose!



Oh, you’ve come back. Please don’t abandon me like that.
I apologize. I assumed you would enjoy playing a game for free. Was it not to your liking?
The game was fun, yes, but… I died about twenty times.
Not bad for an amateur. If left unattended, our losses would have surpassed fifty lives.
Fifty! Wait, how many… Whoa! You have two hundred lives!? I had no idea!
When the score is close to its capacity, you find yourself with so many lives.
Goodness! Over nine million points! H-How long have you played this?
Nearly seven hours have passed.
When I find myself with excess time, I busy myself on this using a single coin. However, I have other plans today.
I’m scared to ask, but if you play with your best effort, how long does it take until you get the maximum score?
About four hours, I estimate. Allow me to finish this.
Excellent. All done. Pardon me. I must take my leave.
What? Do you really want to leave the game just like that?
If you are interested, please take over. No matter your lack of gaming prowess, this many lives will give a few hours.
That’s an understatement…
Whew. Let us regain world peace quickly, so that we can play such games for hours on end without concern for the time.
Hmm… I think I discovered Cave’s secret skill.
Still, if she plays this one game on a single coin all day, I bet the store clerk would be kind of annoyed

And you’ve been managing to goof off even while you’re supposed to be recovering!



Since we’ve saved the CPUs, here’s a ton of celebration mail.
Okay, one at a time. First up… This one doesn’t have an alias.
‘The password is Justin Nep-Nep!’
Huh? That’s…the whole message…
Why am I getting another bad feeling? Next one, ‘Real name’s fine. Noire.’ From Lady Noire?
‘I’m interested in this radio personality thing. I’ll join your show as a guest speaker. Make it happen.
‘I’m a good public speaker and I think, though it’s weird to praise myself, that I’m suitable for this job.’
Um…I’m not sure how to respond. I can’t really promote others. I’ll just mark this one as ‘New.’
The next one is using their real name as well. Blanc? Another CPU?
‘Do you need a playwright for a radio drama or something? I have a great untapped talent just for you.’
Someone else trying to get into showbiz. I can’t hire a CPU playwright or else I’ll get hit by lightning or something.
Oh, did this one just come in?
‘A brown-out in the area forced me to lose my internet connection. Could you please alter my fellow party members?’
It’s not really a live show… Once again, no decent e-mail…
Although, this makes me feel like the CPUs have a lot more idle time than they make it look.

I’m just skilled like that.



Greetings to…huh? Hmm?
What? What’s the matter? Why the concentrated stare at my face?
I thought this once before, but… You wear a lot of dark things.
My clothes? Yeah, cool, aren’t they? I love my black motorcycle outfit.
You are also flat.
Flat?
For a human being, is flat not an acceptable descriptor?
What!? Don’t say that to me!
I offer my apologies for any affront. However, I would ask a favor of you.
Hmm. What is it?
May I attempt to fire 256 bullets into your body?
H-Huh!? What’re you trying to ask me!? Of course you can’t!
Please. I feel I can finally break my previous record!
You’re not allowed to break me!
All right, I accept this challenge. Get ready for my maximum shot output!
Wait, I told you not to! H-Hold on, stop!

Histoire’s going to get really mad if she catches you.



Negative. I am playing a game. It is rather enjoyable, so I play it often.
A game? I’m still surprised. What kind of game is it? I bet it’s an RTS, right?
If you wish to confine it to any single scene, I would say a nurturing sim game. An NSG, if you will.
Wow, that sounds interesting. I’m curious what sort of sim games you like. What’s it about?
In short, it is a game in which you construct a castle and its surrounding city.
Each country has special local goods, so wherever you build your castle, it is one-of-a-kind.
This characteristic is tied to the phone’s GPS functionality.
Allow your GPS to share your location and you can obtain those special goods.
I see. Interesting.
Since traveling with your battalion, I have been able to complete my collection of all these products.
I shall stop playing for today.
Maybe…that was her main reason for joining up with us?

Ugh, you’re right, Histy’ll get pissty.



Perhaps child rearing is a bit inaccurate. I just want to get a few tips on how to treat younger girls.
Of course, since this is an official request, I’ll guarantee a certain kickback for your assistance.
Oh, I don’t need any sort of reward. I’m more concerned about my ability to teach you properly.
Why? You’ve been caring for two young children.
Yes, I do try my best, but I’m not sure if I’ve done a good job.
Who the hell drew on my face while I was taking a nap!?
Hehehe, boo-hoo! It’s your fault for falling asleep right in front of me!
You’re mad, but your face makes it funny. Hehehe.
That’s my typical day here.
I see. We both have our challenges.
The twins seem to have opened up to you, but my CPU Candidate barely acknowledges me.
I suppose the first thing to ask it whether or not you like Uni.
I’d rather not waste our precious time discussing the mythical creations known as emotions.
That’s not a good answer. If you want her to open up to you, you need to open up to her.
Adult conversations consist entirely of valid logic and efficient syntax.
You forget that Uni is still a child. Even you, Kei. You’re still young.
I’ve never found my age or gender a relevant topic for discussion.
This is difficult. Though what you say seems plausible, I don’t think I can put it into practice.
It’s not that hard, really. Praise her when she does something good and scold her when she does something bad.
Also, every now and then you should buy her cake, ice cream, and a new game.
Are these products some sort of bribe?
Not at all. When you think it will make her happy, you buy it.
Offering a product without receiving something equal in value back? Such poor business is hard to fathom.
Don’t think of things in terms of logic and transactions. Just give it a try. I’m sure she’ll be pleasantly surprised.
Hmm.

Also, what’s the deal with you and Noire’s sister, huh?



What? You’re the one who left. What’s wrong with you? You’re acting really strange.
Th-That’s preposterous. Well…
I bought some aesthetically pleasing cakes. Would you like to have a slice with me?
Huh? You bought cakes? What’s wrong with you?
N-Nothing. Do you want some or not?
Of course I’ll eat some, but…
Then sit down. They’re miniature, apparently known as cupcakes, so pick whichever one you like.
Then, I want this one. Which one do you want?
I don’t care.
Okay, here you are.
…
…
Why…are you watching me?
Nothing. It’s the first time we’ve sat together and eaten cake like this.
Hmph. No need to be so enamored by the idea. Eat it quick before the icing gets runny.
I will. Thank you.

What do you mean? We’re friends.



What’s up? Why’re you screaming?
Hmhmhmm. It’s been decided. Nisa Sausage is hitting the market!
Nisa…Sausage?
Is it what it sounds like?
It’s more than you think! They’re releasing my merchandise! It proves I’m a recognized heroine of justice.
Here, try it. It’s a free sample.
Oh, these are healthy sausages with a lot of calcium added in. There’s a card in each box.
The cards are collectible! They took photos of me in heroic poses.
I see. Collectible trading cards, huh? Oh, no kidding. These are professional.
They look way too cool. It doesn’t look like you, Nisa.
Hehehe. Awesome, right? If these take off, a second batch will be released. Then I gotta go to a new photo locale.
Ah. Yeah…

Okay, okay. Geez, no need to get all defensive.



Of course. Many shops will stock them.
If you’re fine with it, that’s okay, I guess.
Pretty big decision.
What? Why? Is something wrong?
It’s strange, but your profile…
These cards even have your measurements.
Wait…whaaaaaat!?
I know you’re flat, but damn. You’re like, really flat.
Surprising in different way.
Don’t call me flat! No, stop! Don’t look at those! Give them all back!
But these are going out to stores across the entire world, right?
Ugh, you’re right! I’ve gotta go buy them all! Attaaaaaack!

I’m not getting defensive!



Hmm? What’s this about?
It’s just that… Well, I’m not sure I should ask.
If you bring it up that way, it makes the situation more awkward. Just ask.
Okay, here I go. Uni, when you activate HDD…
Yes, when I transform…?
D-Do your breasts really shrink!?
Pfffft! Wh-Wh-What’re you trying to say!?
I-I’m so sorry! I knew it would be rude to bring it up.
Of course it’s rude. Nobody would’ve noticed if you just kept your mouth shut!
Really? I think they’re scared to bring it up.
Th-This topic is off-limits now. Don’t you dare say anything to anyone else, you got me!?
O-Okay. Then, Uni…
What is it now?
Does that mean you…stuff them?
Grrr! I just said this is off-limits! Don’t give anyone a reason to be suspicious!

Then why were you paying so much attention to her boobs?



I’m not sure my heart will ever stop fluttering when I hear this song. It’s so amazingly touching.
Of course. It’s my masterpiece. I composed music and lyrics.
You did all this on your own…
Do you love it that much?
Huh? Well, that’s…
I will serenade you with another! This one called ‘Gust Sonata.’
Green sleeves of Nagano mountain…
In winter, makes a lovely white curtain.
Autumn leaves help the land unwind!
Wealth be with me till I go blind!
…
What happened? Speechless?
U-Um, yes. It was very touching.
Hmhmhmm. I see, I see.
If I perform concerts like 5pb., I could make small fortune.
I don’t get it at all. What’s Nagano? Does she know you don’t sing a sonata?

Wh-What? I just noticed is all! Next time on Hyperdimension Neptunia, Mark 2: Ultimate Showdown: CFW Magic! Oh my goodness! That sounds really bad!