The Let's Play Archive

Legend of Wulin Heroes

by Nyaa

Part 27: Chapter Twenty-Seven: Drunken Justice Episode I

Taking next week off for collage depression preparation, but I will also use the time to sort out all those music file that I ripped out. Any suggestion on what site to upload them to?

SeaGoatSupreme posted:

Hey. Hey you. Yeah you. Can you edit the script faster? I want an updateeeee.
This is quite a shitty snype. I'm sorry.
Actually my internet wiped out yesterday...that's the last time I watch a video from yahoo.

Also want to eternally thank whoever gift me this avatar.

Part Twenty-Seven: Drunken Justice Episode I
Music: Tea House

Year Two Early June: Master Flawless’ room

[Sigh]…the day of Young Hero Tournament is approaching.

Young Hero Tournament? Schoolbrothers, what’s that?

You country bumpkin. Have you never even heard of it?

Bro, this is a special tournament where youths of the same age as us will compete with each other and the winner will be known as the Young Hero. You can say that the Young Hero Tournament is best and quickest way for a youngster to become famous.

Really? This is such a great opportunity!

Enough chitchat, dusk draws near, so go get some sleep all of you.

Yes, master.

Outside Master Flawless’ room, Jesus continues the conversation.

Brother, is what you just said all true?

Of course, this is a big event in Wulin.

How do I apply for it?

Basically, each sect elects one student to participate, since this is a matter of the sect’s reputation, every master sends their best.

Then who do you think our master will pick out of the three of us?

Hoho, not us three, it’s just you and schoolbrother Thorn; since I am already over twenty years old I cannot participate.

Wow! Bro is so old already.

I will ignore that comment this time! I don’t know who master will send, but I guess he will just send the one he likes the most.

Is that so, then I better work on it.

I will ignore whatever you are scheming It’s dark, go to bed.

Jesus meets Bramble Thorn on his way back to his room…and ignore the sunny day in the background, the bird is flying on the other side of the world or something.

Schoolbrother, you’re still awake at this hour?

I am going to bed now, thanks you for caring.

Don’t be mistaken, I’m just saying a courteous greeting. Ah yes, are you thinking about the Young Hero Tournament?


Cat got your tongue? Let me tell you this, don’t even fantasize about it. You will just shame the carefree sect if you go.

Schoolbrother, that’s a bit too direct.

Yeah? Don’t like it? Wanna fight?


1) Punch his face
2) Punch his face
3) Punch his face

Nothing to say eh? Why bother participating when you don’t even know a thing about the tournament.


1) Punch his stupid face
2) Punch his ugly face
3) Punch his smugly face

Don’t say I am not being a good schoolbrother; because I will at least tell you that tournament actually consists of literacy and kung fu segments.

It has two tests?

1) Forgive his stupid face
2) Forgive his ugly face
3) Forgive his smugly face

You inadequate, the literacy exam tests your knowledge of music, chess, art, calligraphy and so forth.The kung fu exam consists of duels against the other students. In the end, the one with the best performance in both exams will be known as the Young Hero. Understand you little frog in a well?


1) Claw his eyes out
2) Rip his heart out
3) Twist his neck

Tell me, are you good at any of those?


1) Pee in his empty eye socket
2) Pull all his hairs and call him baldy
3) Dress him like a girl

I suggest you give up now, hahahahaha.


1) Is on Bitch!
3) Plot dreadful revenge!

Next morning, Jesus thought about what new methods of training he should work on.

Perception Training

Stare down a tough guy with a deadly weapon!

Break hard things with your head!

Speed Training

Skip across floating leaves!

But Jesus thinks that this is ridiculous and so he proceeds to gets some manly alcoholic supplements instead.

He finally won a total of 51 times in the game of Janken with the drunken old men.

Note: The Janken game becomes rigged when you win nine times in a session, so Jesus need to visit at least six times to win all 51 games.

Hohohohoho, little buddy, from the past until now, there hasn’t been anyone who could win against me so many times. You are the first, so I am really impressed by you.

Little buddy, let me teach you my ultimate technique—Drunken Fist, you watch closely now.

Note: He teaches either drunken fist or drunken staff depending on whether your fist or staff stat is higher. I have them both the same value so it chooses randomly.

I have memorized it, thanks for the lesson.

Hohoho, if you really want to thank me, then brings me more liquor. [Sigh], all these swinging makes me thirsty; I am going back for another drink.

Let’s visit the forest for some potential drunk brawling.

Lady Ruta!

Oh it is you, Mr.Jesus!

What are you doing here all alone?

Dad told me to gather some herbs for the sick.

1) Elect yourself as her guardian
2) Go back to Carefree Valley

Jesus decides to protect the cute weak.

Then let me assist you since this place is isolated and there might be some criminals around. I can at least help you brutally slaughter get rid of them.

Thank you, Jesus.

You’re welcome. So what herbs do you need? I will gather them for you.

I have gathered most of them; all I need is four sets of ginseng and angelica sinensis.

Author comment: I still don’t regret skipping translations for herb.

No problem! Leave it to me!

Then we will split up and look for them!


Jesus is looking for these two, but he already has some with him anyway.

Medical skill increased, it is now 35

Lady Ruta, I got the herbs!

Eh? Where is she?

This guy…inherited his mother’s lip.


Stop right there!

Oh? Are you her guardian?

That’s right! You better stay away, creep! Or I will make sure you won’t leave in one piece.

Hehehe, won’t leave in one piece? You should know that anyone who said that to me has gone on to meet king Yama. Today you are the one who won’t leave here alive, so say hi to Yama for me!

Shut your lip, en garde!

This guy is the second or third weakest enemy with one block of movement so this battle is like a turtle versus a rabbit SR-71 Blackbird Military Jet.

And this Jet will be operated by a drunken pilot.

Due to the unpredictable nature of drunken fist, it has a 3 x 3 x 3 range on one target.

Note: Proper translation of the range of 3 squares horizontal, 3 square vertical and 3 square diagonally.


Slow-motion Shots

Yo~~man, yooo thirsty?

I am so swimmingly relexy with ma booze~~

Awww—you no fun man…

Here’s some explosions, is on da house.

Drunken Fist mastery increased, it is now 6
Battle Experience increased
Kung Fu Knowledge increased

Battle Experience: The Jet is powered by alcohol.
Learned Knowledge: Alcohol might solve this guy’s lip problem.

This guy’s attack looks like some kid playing than actual kung fu.

Mastery of the drunken fist at 100% allows Jesus to create chi afterimages to further confuse the hell out of the opponent.

Hehe, how’s that?

You rotten punk, don’t get too cocky! I just have a stomach problem today so I can’t swing as well as usual, WHICH is why I lost to you. If you don’t believe me then we can pick another day for a duel, AND I assure you will lose!

Don’t fall for his trap, Jesus! This guy has already lost and he’s just moaning about it!

No worries, we will have a duel. The outcome always depends on the person’s ability, and I doubt he will have any tricks up his sleeve.

Hey! Tell me the date and I will come!

Let it be in a month today!

Fine, I hope you aren’t going to have diarrhea next time, hahaha!


Miss Ruta, are you alright?

I am fine, thanks for saving me.

No problem at all, it’s my obligation as the Drunken Justice!. It seem the night is approaching, so let me escort you home since we have the herbs.


Relationship with Ruta increased.

The bird watches the couple return to Relaxation Village.

Young man, I must thank you for saving my daughter!

No problem, it is a dutiful thing to do ,for I am Drunken Justice!. Oh it’s late; I will have to take my leave.

Alright, say hi to your master for me.

Will do, good bye.



Be careful on your way home.


Potential Avatar of the Night

Would you like some lip-services?