The Let's Play Archive

Legend of Wulin Heroes

by Nyaa

Part 99: Chapter Ninety-Nine: 狗血剧情

Warning: The following chapter contains a removed event nicknamed as the “Dog Blood” event. Spilling Dog Blood (洒狗血) is a saying that mean melodramatic.

So, I will tag this sign here and suggest those with weak heart to skip this chapter.

Part Ninety-Nine: 狗血剧情

The infamous “Dog Blood” event arrives!

School brother, school brother.

It’s senior school brother, what’s the hurry? What happened? Did something happen to master?

You mischievous kid, the first thing you can think of is cursing master? You will be in trouble if I told master that.

It’s just a joke, what do you need?

You really did it this time. All your affairs with girls have caught up to you now, someone came to the entrance demanding to see you. Let’s see how you deal with that.

Wh-what? I don’t know what you mean.

You will know when you go to the entrance, hehehe.

You must be Christ.

I am Christ, and you are?

I am the servant of the fourth princess of Sura Palace — Little Mist.

Note: I kept calling it Sura Sect, but the name is Sura Palace

So it’s lady Mist, what does you inquire at my home?

Are you for real or not? Our fourth princess suffers so much because of you, you heartless scum. Let’s just pretend our fourth princess met the wrong person then, hmph.

Lady Mist, I’ve never even heard of Sura Palace, so how could I even know your fourth princess? Maybe you found the wrong person.

This place is Carefree Valley, yes? You are the third student of Carefree Valley, Christ?

This place indeed is Carefree Valley, and I am indeed Christ, but I really don’t know who’s your fourth princess.

You are still saying that. Looks like I have to punish you, heartless scum, or my name isn’t Little Mist.

Hold it ma’am, I already have someone I love, and your spreading of my wild exploits of women’s hearts would make me look like I am a playboy. You better settle this with me right here, right now.

Wha! Not only are you heartless, but you exploit hearts elsewhere! Fourth princess, your values are being cheapened!

Don’t cry, all these arguments and you haven’t told me who your fourth princess is.

Hmph, our fourth princess is the Sura Palace’s number one beauty, fourth princess Faire Ren.

Ah… it’s Faire Ren, you said she suffered a lot, hurry and tell me what happened.

So you finally admit it, hmph… you heartless man.

Tell me already, what happened to Faire Ren.

It’s all because of you, giving her some stupid flower and making her look at the flowers everyday and sighing at it, it attracted our great princess’s attention which eventually led to her discovery of her love for you.

(So Faire Ren has actually fallen for me, yet I didn’t know. I am really at fault with Ren) What happened next?

Unfortunately, our Sura Palace’s law is to hate every man in the world.

What kind of law is that!

As a result, great princess wanted the fourth princess to reveal the person who gave her the flower, and fourth princess knows that if she spills it out then great princess would go to take his life, so she won’t say anything. Consequently, great princess tormented her so much so that her kung fu is incapacitated and the tortures caused her to not even resemble a humanoid.

If this makes you uncomfortable, stop reading now.

Ah!!! Such a thing happened, so the poem she left for me last time… I am so stupid, now I understand.

I saw the pitiful state of fourth princess and just couldn’t stomach it, so I sneaked out of the palace to find you heartless scum hoping that you will go meet her one last time.

No need to say anymore, let’s go.

Hold it.

School brother.

School brother, I hope you will reconsider, as rumored in Jiangwu, Sura Palace’s kung fu is strong, and they hate every man in the world, so your trip there might be your last.

Not to mention the wrath of our master if he knew you leave the valley for a love affair, he won’t let it off that easily and might even expel you from the sect. All this require you to consider carefully, or else one wrong step would be devastating.


1) Go
2) Don’t go

If Christ chooses don’t go…

(Man has more important things to do in the world, so there’s no way he should just die for a lady!) Lady Mist, tell her that I am not fortunate enough to be with her, may we continue our love in next life.

You… you heartless monster, cruel horrible scum, our fourth princess really has fallen for the wrong person, you… you will definitely get your divine retribution.

If Christ chooses to go…

School brother, if I were to protect my life for the sake of reputation by giving up on Faire Ren, that will be something I will never do.

Very well, since you have decided, then I won’t say more. I wish you luck.

School brother…

Enough said, just remember, if something can’t be done, then don’t force it, or else you would be in danger.

My farewell to you school brother, and tell master that if I come back alive, then I will accept my punishment. Good bye.

The bird follows Christ and Little Mist to the Sura Palace.

Music: Sura Palace

Upon reaching the not-so-resized-well Sura Palace’s entrance…

Sir Christ, this is Sura Palace. Fourth Princess is locked in the back mountain, and our security is really tight, and they will kill any man on sight, so please be very careful.

Thank you lady Mist, I will be careful.

Nope, Christ is not gonna barge in to save a maiden, and this will get worse, so this is your final warning.

Little Mist, you have some guts, sneaking out of the palace and even bringing a man here, you two come with me to the great princess.

It’s you, sister Maple. Good sister, you sure have scared me.

You are lucky I am on duty now, if it wasn’t me, then great princess would have scalped a few layers of skin off you. This man is?

He’s the man that fourth princess has been admiring.

So it’s you, certainly looks like a smart one, and quite handsome too. No wonder our fourth princess has fallen for you, our poor fourth princess… she… she… she… wahh…

Please don’t cry yet, and tell me what happened. How’s Ren?

At first our fourth princess had been badly tortured by our great princess, and after Little Mist sneaked away, the great princess became much more enraged, so she used much crueler methods on the fourth princess.

What happened then?

One day, great princess brought four men to the palace, and everyone thought it would just be as usual where she would torture them to death, but we were wrong.

Isn’t the great princess going to do that?

No, we later realized that we were wrong. Upon great princess’s return, she brought those four men to the back mountain and told them… them…

What did great princess said? Hurry and tell me, sister Maple.

She told the four men.

You four listen well, this girl, only this girl, you all can do whatever you like to her, as long as you don’t kill her. If she dies, then you all will die with her.

And you, Maple. No matter what happens, you must not interfere. These four men are criminal rapists hunted by the government, if you dare to interfere, then you will join this bitch, hahaha!

Faire Ren, this is your last chance to repent, sister will give you one more chance. As long as you agree, then we can become good sisters again and I will pretend none of this ever happened.

Hmph! You bitch; since you want to suffer, then don’t blame my cruelty. You think your lover will come to save you? When he sees that messed up body of yours, do you think he would still love you?

When he knows you slept with thousands of men, kissed millions of customers, do you think he would still want you? Hmph!

I will, I will still want her. No matter what she looks like, I will still want Ren.

That night, we all heard the fourth princess screaming in agony, the whole night, never receded. Soon after, as time goes on… one day… two days… three days… fourth princess’s screams also gradually disappeared

Ah… Ren… Ren… I am sorry… Ren.

Some time later, one day I was patrolling the back mountain and saw the fourth princess.

Ren!!! How is she!?

Fourth princess…

What happened to her?

When I saw her, she was all tied up, wounds all over her body, scraps of clothing everywhere with a few pieces a ripped fabrics still holding on to her. Her body is covered with dirty mud and she has this filthy smell, and those four bastards all laying beside her sleeping and snoring.

Although the great princess ordered me to not get close to fourth princess, I still gathered my courage and walked near the fourth princess to talk to her. No matter how I call her, she won’t respond. She just stares at the side like a mannequin, not a single movement.

So I look at the direction where she is watching to see what she is looking at, and then I realize at my first glance what she was looking at.

What is the fourth princess looking at? Is it a weapon? A steep cliff? Or??

Fourth princess is looking at a yellow flower.

Ah… you say that Ren is looking at a yellow flower!!

Yeah, fourth princess always looking at the little yellow flower that grows beside the cliff.

Say no more, where is she, please tell me her location.

Hahahaha, no need to ask them, you rotten kid. I sure have been searching for you a long time, yet you dare to choose hell and come here when you could have walked the road to heaven. This time you won’t get away even if you have wings.

You must be Sura Palace’s great princess, Asura. Please return Ren to me.

You want to see that whore? Sure, I will bring you to her, come with me.

Great princess, this smelly woman is like a wooden doll, no reaction at all, it sure is getting boring.

Hahaha, kid, this is the person you been dreaming about, how is it? Hurry and join them for the fun, hahaha, too shy? Too dirty for your taste!! HAHAHAHAHA.





All your battle stats increased

Music: Valentine

REN… REN… IT’S ME, Christ… Ren.

Hahaha, I say this vile woman has already lost her mind, everyday just looking at that yellow flower and not moving one bit.

Ren… Ren… respond to me, Ren, Ren, I brought the Tight Feeling that you gave me, look.

Note: Christ referring to the yellow flower they named Tight Feeling in the previous chapter.

Tight Feeling… Tight Feeling… ah… Christ, why are you here?

I am here, I am here, I am here too late, and caused you to suffer so much, I deserve to die. So sorry, Ren.

My love, this is not your fault, don’t feel bad about it, I… I thought I won’t ever see you again.

N-no, I’m here, at your side, so no one will harm you again. I will be by your side, always, always… never leave you again.

It’s too late my love, my soiled body is not worthy of you anymore. I am satisfied at the fact that I can see you again, and I won’t wish for more. You better leave this place before great princess notice you, the further you go, the better.

HAHAHA, my little Ren, who do you say has not noticed?

GREAT PRINCESS!!!! Christ, hurry and run, don’t worry about me, run!

Rotten kid, how about it? Seeing your lover at this state, can you still love her? You still want her?

Smelly demon bitch, I will tell you now, Faire Ren was born as Christ’s wife, and will die as Christ’s wife’s ghost. Time will move on, space will change, but the soul of my heart will not change. This lifetime, I will love her no matter what, and today I will do all I can to bring her out of here!

Ah… Christ.

Hmph, without my permission, you think Sura Palace is some place that you can come and go as you like? Let me tell you something, this rotten woman has been poisoned by my special poison, and if she doesn’t have the antidote, then she won’t have the chance to see tomorrow’s sunrise. Even if your kung fu is the greatest, it won’t spare her life.

You bitch, what do you want?

Hmph, not much, a life for a life, if you are willing to consume this bottle of poison, then I will give this filthy woman her antidote, and I will even restore her kung fu.

Alright, I will eat it, but you must first give her the antidote and restore her kung fu.

Don’t do it Christ!

Alright, I doubt you can escape me if you pull any tricks.

Note: This is a common chi healing position where the healer runs chi into the body of the injured to fix up all the haywired chi network and regulate blood flow.

REN!! REN!!!

Hmph! She just fainted.

... … give me the poison.

Kid, this is not just your regular poison, don’t think there will be an antidote for it. Once it consumes it, it will first damage all your Eight Extraordinary Meridians(Info?), and make you no different from a cripple. Even if someone manages to cure it, you will still end up as a cripple, so do you have any reconsideration?

Enough talking, give it to me.


You… you really took it, so this world still has someone that can give up everything for love. Fine, you two can get out; don’t ever let me see you two again.

Christ, why are you so stubborn, why?

Ren, I now know that without you, this big world has no place for me to go. Life is beautiful, but I am born without any love for it, let us go.

The bird watches as Ren carry the dying Christ out of Sura Palace.

Sir Medicine, Sir Medicine, Sir Medicine… Sir Medicine… Sir…

Who’s been yelling so fervently? Someone dying or something?

Sir Medicine, please save him.

Oh, why is this kid injured like this, no, this is poison. Strange, what is this poison, such a strong poison, splitting throughout the Eight Extraordinary Meridians, I never seen such thing before.

This is Sura Palace’s special poison, please save him, Sir Medicine.

Hm… this poison is indeed dangerous, just a two or three more hours and even the immortal god can’t save him. At this rate, looks like I will have to use the life saving method that I come up from the researches I spent my whole lifetime to discover.

Please save him, sir.

I did the best I can, but…

But what, I will do anything.

I will say it now, the method is to replace the blood of the poisoned with another person’s blood, in other word, this is a method to exchange one life for another.

One life for another?

But time is short, where can I find someone who are willing to give up his life to save another person.

I will.

Th… lady… you should reconsider.

My love, please don’t blame Ren, I am just a soiled flower, while you have a bright future ahead of you. In fact, if you died, then I wouldn’t want to live alone either.

Sir Medicine, come, please tell him for me that we can’t be together this lifetime, and if there is a next life, then Ren iswilling to continue our love there on, tell him to take care of his body and don’t do any more dumb things.

Alright… ma’am, I will.

The bird sheds a tear for the unfortunate couple.

Why am I here, Ren? Ren?

You finally awaken, kid.

Sir Medicine, why am I here?

You werere brought here by a lady.

It’s Ren, it must be Ren, sir, where is she?

To save your life, she willingly gave up her life to save you by removing all your poison into her body.

AHH… REENNNNNNNNN… Heavens, why, why do you have to torture us, why two people in romance can’t be together, why two people in love can’t be together till old age… heavens… why.

She wanted me to tell you that she can’t be with you this lifetime, but if there’s a next life then she will continue with you there, and told you to take care of your body, don’t do anything dumb.

Ren… Ren… the days without you, what is there in life for me to look forward to… Ren… Ren.

Quite down, kid. You are going to cry her to death at this rate.

Sir… what did you said?

Enough chatting, what you need to do now is to go back to Carefree Valley, help your master take care of the Jiangwu’s affair. A man should set their sight in the world, not getting depress by a love situation.


Don’t be unresolved about it; you think that would repay the teaching of your master? Repay everyone’s expectation of you?

You are right, thank you for giving me this second chance, I will take my leave.


All your battle stat reduced.