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We're onto the third New Washington job. So far it's been comparatively plain sailing but that can't last.

Titan TV is a bit low brow but they test well with the blue jumpsuit and folded arms demographic.

Spare me the technobabble, guys. "Find this guy and make him all dead like" would have done.

Well, I guess he'll be pretty easy to find if his face is made up of a bunch of green wires.

So, this is our mission: to hunt down and retire a rogue humanoid cyborg. I sure hope we don't run into any blades on the way.

You'll note that the name of the new inventory item drops all pretence or originality.

I show the photo to the first blue jumpsuit I see after leaving the job agency, and what do you know, he has a lead. Hey, this detective business is easier than I thought.

Off we go back to the [s]bar[/s] cafe to rough up some wise guys. Conrad's trenchcoat and fedora are at the dry cleaners.

A conspicuous newcomer appears to have turned up since the last time we were here, and he's really putting away the sauce. The... coffee sauce, I mean.

The cops in the future have ditched their 'serve and protect' motto in favour of the more honest 'to befriend murderous robots and shoot you'.

Restricted Area 1 is in America, where we already are. A rare moment of convenience.

Anomalously, the cop does not try to kill us, as he seems to be too busy watching Naruto on his iPod.

I guess word has gotten around of my steely gaze and fine buttocks.

Back we go.

"Behind" means "to the left of".

As we approach, the jumpsuit throws himself onto his face, angry music starts up, and somehow a mutant has gotten past the bouncer.

Hey, bouncer... now there's a job Conrad could do.

Conrad grills the suspect with his disapproving look.

I guess I should try to work in some private eye noir monologue.

"The patsy spills his guts like that one guy from Jurassic Park who got killed by a Velociraptor. You know the one I mean."

I'm not very good at private eye noir monologue.

(sigh) back we go AGAIN.

Now the cop shows a little spunk and actually attacks you, his plans for his cyborg boyfriend in ruins. Conrad promptly kills the twerp.

Key retrieved. Back we go again AGAIN.

"The hideout entrance opened easier than the legs of my childhood friend's mother. Damn that was a weird sleepover."

I think this calls for a stealthy approach.

Well, so much for that.

Here's the motherfucker. And look, he brought a friend.

Now then, the cyborg. These dudes are probably the second toughest enemies in the game. Essentially they can do everything you can do - they can duck, shoot, and climb up ledges to get you.

They can also press a button on their belts, turn into T-1000 glowing silvery men and execute a sort of teleport dash that takes them about two-thirds of the way across the screen. They usually do this to get close to you and pistolwhip your skull into powder. Strangely, they very rarely actually fire their guns. They probably have to pay for their own ammo.

The best strategy for dealing with cyborgs is, as with so many things, the crouch and roll, so for this reason make sure you fight them in fairly open environments where walls and holes won't mess up your acrobatics. They're quite vulnerable immediately after a teleport dash, so when they press their belts, roll towards them, quickly turn left and mash the fire button. They'll usually get up and immediately dash, so again roll towards them and repeat the process.

Duck, shoot, roll, turn, shoot, roll, turn, shoot, roll... they're pretty easy once you've got the pattern down. Boring, even.

The two cyborgs in this example have wound up very close to each other while pursuing me, and since their AI is so predictable they're basically moving as one. This seems to happen by accident more often than not but it's certainly easier to deal with.

After Deckard Conrad shoots them enough times their bodies melt away into the ether. 300 credits in hand and a free ride back to the office. Few temp agencies would be so thoughtful.

Next update: Exploding reactors and more of those dang old mutants


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