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Episode XV: Bald is Beautiful
When last we left our hero, he’s coming to the sad realization he’s never going to get shack up with a woman. With that said, let’s get to item collecting…
Leon is now augmented with the Club Key. Which gives him a +2 to Intelligence but his fatigue regenerates at a 25% slower rate.
Since Claire already played the dumbass with the autopsy room hijinks, Leon is free to enter the storage closet.
And claim his prize. Two whole spaces. That’s enough room to fit a rocket launcher or a shotgun and 90 shells or a nickel sized key and a tiny ornamental plug.
Leon heads all the way back upstairs and puts the Club Key to use in the conference room door.
There were other areas. But they were redundant. Hey, so is this! I want my money back!
Behold the magic of carrying a lighter and not smoking. It’s a shame Leon took such a hardlined stance to evade lung cancer and ended up shooting radioactive laser beams into his chest in a future game. 
Well, guess where we’re going…again…
JESUS CHRIST!
“¿Dónde está mi sombrero?”
Leon swipes the gear and flees in terror from the crazy moon language the still kicking Señor X is babbling.
GREAT GHOST OF ABE VIGODA!
“Yo necesito mi sombrero para mi cabeza. ¡Muy importante!”
“I can’t understand what you’re saying!”
“Me han robado.”
“I…cannot…understand…you. This is not Spain!"
“Idiota. Permítame presentarle a mi puño.”
“You know what? If you’re gonna come to the country. Learn the language! Ya big prick.”
Remembering back to Claire saying she cleared the wreckage in the corridor, Leon spends the next 20 minutes trying to find out what the hell she was talking about.
There we go.
First things first.
The Chief’s room is still devoid of Irons and his, must be rank by this point, female companion. A pity.
His incredibly incriminating diary is still left for Leon’s innocent eyes to glance over and realize he should have just stuck with the dishwasher job at TGIF.
Officer Kennedy heads into the back room. Continuing to realize that applying for a police officer job over the Internet without actually checking out the place wasn’t a great tactic…
A little treasure chest in the back of the room Sherry was first introduced gives way to another crank. Sensible a place as any, I suppose.
Leon heads back into the hall to…
“Mi cabeza es mucho frio!”
“Leon Kennedy no hablo Mexican, alright!”
Leon scoots past the green clad villain and takes a trip up to the clock tower. Nothing of note stops him this time.
I believe we have the complete set, ladies and gentlemen. Now just to climb all the way back down to the basement.
You’re shitting me, ace… You want to jump down a hole in the third story of this building which has no indication of where the bottom leads or what horrific beasts could be trolling about down there?
And thus…
A legend…
…was born!
Tune in next time for batshit insanity, ultra violence, and puking bosses in Episode XVI: A Bit Torn.
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