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In an effort to make as many people as happy as possible without resorting to blowjobs, I've gone through and added italicized text captions for all of the animations for all of the old updates. I had some complaints that some people "wanted" to read the thread, but couldn't because they hated trying to read my animated conversations.

So no more excuses to miss out on the hillarity. Enjoy it... Whiners.










Vanity, thy name is Son of Bug Jug.




I'm not cleaning that up.




After only a few steps he slumps to the floor.

Give that man an Emmy!




Cleaning up space puke for a living tends to make you hate life.




Title : Astral Body
Searching...
Title Found... Retrieving.


My Mom always told me to do whatever strange old men tell me to - might as well type that into the computer.


In the future, ladders are a lost technology.


Open the pod bay doors, Hal.


They let anybody at all open and close the bay doors, but you need a keycard to take this elevator.


You turn the dial to the right. The light begins to glow.

Space schwag! This stuff's going on Ebay. But for now, we'll settle for turning on the Universal translator.


A baffling number of the initial "puzzles" can be solved with "look panel" and "push button".


close door
wear seatbelt
push power button
push autonav
pull throttle


Flyin' ain't easy but it's necessary.




Phew! Flying away from the danger, now I can relax.


DAMN IT!


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