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Hold-on tight, kids - a ridiculously heavy update comin' at you.
Throughout this whole meeting scene, you can see Roger through the windows (presumably) sliding around the hallways in his socks.
Some guy : Huh? What was that?
Some guy : Excuse me, Captain, but you didn't raise your hand.
Amdiral somebody : Now, as I as saying, Ambassador Wankmeister, we are a fairly remote installation and I simply can't spare the ships to launch the kind of operation you suggest.
Beatrice : I'm afraid you don't understand the potential ramications of this problem, Admiral.
Beatrice : If the sludge bandits continue to illegaly dump toxic waste whenever and wherever they choose, the environmental consequences could be staggering.
Beatrice : Entire planets could be devestated!
Admiral : I think you overstate the issue, Ambassador. Even so, we have more than enough ships on patrol to put a stop to these 'sludge bandits', as you call them.
Quirk : Look, Ambassador. We have top-notch ships staffed with the finest crews in the galaxy. Starcon accepts only the best and brightest for fleet training.
Beatrice : YOU look, rug-head! Illegal dumping is going on in this sector right under your poly-weave. Our patrols have located dumping sites on four planets in the G6 quadrant alone.
Quirk : Hey! This is made from real hair! Er, ahem...
Quirk : In any case, I'd like to hear more about these alleged dumping sites. Perhaps over dinner this evening?
Beatrice : I have already transmitted the coordinates to Starcon central command, along with the list of suspected sites that we haven't been able to check out yet.
Admiral : Well then, that settles it. Captain Quirk, you shall go to these sites and investigate Ambassador Wankmeister's allegations.
Beatrice : Admiral, I'll be going along as an observer.
Admiral : I'm afraid that's impossible. Regulations strictly forbid civilian participation in military operations.
Beatrice : Admiral, may I remind you that I am an OFFICIAL representative of the people of quadrant G-6 with full Ambassadorial status and as such not subject to...
Admiral : ... Now, now, Ambassador. I'm suire Captain Quirk will do everything necessary to resolve the situation. There's no need for you to hinder him on this mission.
Quirk : Uh, Admiral... I think having the Ambassador along would be a good idea. I'm sure the two of us could develop a productive working relationship.
Beatrice : This is MY system and MY people we're talking about here! I'm going on that ship and that's all there is to it! CASE CLOSED! WE'RE ADJOURNED! GOOD DAY GENTLEMEN!
There was, but then the masking tape fell off
Totally worth it.
Smart guy : Yeah, I caught the jerk trying to sneak some answers off my test.
Some guy : Shhh, here he comes.
Hallucinations can often be the first sign of a brain tumor or the onset of dementia
And so, having undergone an intesive weekend captain's training seminar on oakhurst, roger is shuttled to his new command - the SCS Eureka.
Wilco : Hey, that's not a starship, it's a garbage scow!
The first glimpse of your crew. He's either playing a gameboy, or having some type of seizure. Or both.
Wilco : Hello crew, I'm your new commanding officer, Captain Roger Wilco.
Wilco : I know some of you may not be as excited to be serving on the Eureka as I am, but I promise you this : We are going to be the BEST darn garbage scow in the entire Starcon Confederation!
Droole : Hello sir, I'm subcorporal droole, your nav and weapons officer in this heap.
Flo : Flo's the name. I'm your comm specialist - Grade 4.
Wilco : We have nothing to fear but fear itself, so hold your heads high men, we shall overcome!
Wilco : All we are is dust in the wind : Born free, running wild, with liberty and justice for all! So let's be all we can be. Remember, it's not just a job: it's an adventure!
Give me a break, I don't have my sea-legs yet!
Wilco : It was the chair, really!
Droole : Looks like we got a live one here, Flo.
Flo : You said it, Droole.
Weeeeeeeeeeee!!!
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