Part 15: Episode XV: The Postman's OathEpisode XV: The Postman's Oath
Music: Seafront Tunes
D'aww. I love these big dopey seals rolling around. Huh... Oh? Right, yeah... Sick daughter. Fish liver medicine... Better get back to that business...
While trotting back toward home, Nier will come across an old lady who may or may not be affiliated with the lighthouse. Just a hunch.
Unfortunately, there is clearly no word bubble above her head despite the mini-cutscene or two introducing her. Oh well, I guess it is noth-
"I said, hold it! Over here!"
"Well, pretty easily when you don't even put up a quest word bubble..."
"The children of this age are nothing but selfish, heartless cads!"
"Wait, are you talking about me?"
"Oh, ignore her! We've a quest to complete! People like that are best left to their own devices."
"Oh! Ohhhhhhh! Oh, the pain!"
"My illness has returned! It must have been the shock of seeing this rude floating book!"
"Rude!? B-BOOK!? Now see here, madam! I'll have you know-"
"You! You did this! Oh, what a terrible thing you are!"
"Why, you insolent crone! How dare you address me like some common paperback!?"
"You there! Boy! Would you truly abandon a pitiful old woman to this cruel world?"
We have the option to refuse the old woman's quest. But, I'm pretty sure she'll just bitch Nier out until he complies. And, we're trying to 100% most of the sidequest so ehh...let's just go along with it.
"I am at a loss as to what aid we could possibly give a woman who is so clearly able to talk her way into anything."
"I need you to go to the post office and tell them to delivery my mail!"
"I can't fathom why they haven't been here yet..."
"Ohhh! Ohhhhhhh, the pain!"
"Enough! We'll go the post office! Just...stop saying things."
So the post office off on the other side of town. It really isn't too impressive looking for the hub of postal services in the known world. But, I guess you take what you can get after the collapse of civilization. At least Kevin Costner isn't around anymore.
Music: Seafront Room Tunes
I'm calling bullshit. I live at the beach. There is no way the post office would be open at a convenient time of day. Honestly, 9:00 AM till 12:30 PM and 1:30 to 3:30 PM weekdays only? With mail getting sent off at 2:30? Some of us have jobs, you dicks.
"There's an old lady at the coast who wants her mail ...Badly."
"Oh, you mean the lighthouse lady?"
"The very same. Now, could you please deliver her parcels and silence her flapping gums!?"
"Sorry, but I just hurt my leg. I won't be delivering anything for a while."
"She won't like that at all."
"What about your sacred postman's oath? 'Neither wind, nor sleet, nor terrible monsters of the night shall keep thee from-"
"Fine. I'll do it. Give me the mail."
"B...but the oath! This slackjawed layabout has a duty to the town!"
"Give it a rest, Weiss. It's a video game with a post office. The package could be needed for delivery across the room and we'd still get roped into it."
"Typical. I hope whoever first envisioned such a dull task and made it commonplace befell quite the messy fate."
"Oh, that's a huge help, thank you. Just uh...be careful, all right? That lady has a bit of a temper..."
"You don't say?"
Love Letter 2/12/3340
So, tampering with the mail is no longer a federal offense and Nier is free to rip open any envelops and read up on some gossip before delivering them. I see the mail of the future is just as slow as that of today. This letter is only 21 years late...
"You know, since..."
"Oh, what is it now!?"
"Are you from Popola's village?"
"How'd you know that?"
"You're dressed differently than most folks."
"Where did you get that ridiculous get-up anyway...?"
"I made it."
"That explains so much..."
"And where the hell do you get off calling MY outfit ridiculous...? Did you see the woman we fought the other day...?"
Letter to Popola
So, long story short: the mailman also wants us to deliver a
Alright, let's get this over with. Rest assure, this is not the last we'll see of the post office.
A quick jog back to the beach...
Of course, the lighthouse lady has wandered off. Nothing is ever easy...
Luckily, her title makes her rather easy to locate.
A jog to the lighthouse later...
I can see the largest lighthouse in the country out my window. At night it will flash through my bedroom window every 7.5 seconds if I do not have the curtains drawn. Did I mention I hate lighthouses...?
"...Oh. You. What do you want?"
"We have retrieved your letter."
"The postman hurt his leg. That's why he-"
"That's no excuse! It's his job to deliver the mail, no matter what! Didn't he take the postman's oath!?"
"The thought that anyone would actually bother to write you a letter staggers the imagination."
"Such a rude book! ...I'll have you know, this is from someone very dear to me. Well, I suppose I should give you something for your trouble."
The Lighthouse Lady tips Nier 1000 gold for the effort and kicks him out. Lovely old gal, that one. Anyway, let's get our asses back to Yonah already and be done with this fisherman's gambit.
A dash and boar drift back toward home later...
"It's all right. I'm going to make some medicine for you. It won't taste very good, but I need you to take it anyway."
"Okay... I'll take it."
"Good girl. Now, get some sleep."
"Okay... Thanks, dad..."
Lighthouse Lady Meeting
Music: Seafront Room Tunes