The Let's Play Archive

Neverwinter Nights 2: Storm of Zehir

by Dolash

Part 31: Wherein there's some other stuff and PIRATES!



: Arise! Arise! A busy day awaits.
: Ugh, have I mentioned that I hate you recently?
: One would expect to be accustomed to our morning rituals by now.
: A man who tires of sleeping in 'till noon has tired of life - and thanks to that bearded alarm clock, I'm tired all the time now.
: Arise! Ar-



: Oh.
: Uh, hey there.
: …Good morning?



: Yyyyeah, we were just… um, that is, it was very cold last night so-
: We read a book!
: Right! Because we couldn't sleep! Because… it was so cold?
: Upon reconsideration I do not care about this. Come! Arise! We have work to do!



: Hey! What're you talking to our secretary for?
: Variel is our majordomo, not our-
: Does she take notes?
: Well, yes-
: Secretary. Seriously, what is the deal?
: I am making arrangements for our absence. We have many stops to make today, and the company must run smoothly.



: Beef try not be absent, if present whole year get special ribbon!
: So where are we going, exactly? What stops?
: Our company and financial assets are all quite secure, and we have also secured a great deal of magical assets and crafting resources.
: Indeed. We are almost finished here on the Sword Coast. Before we can follow Sa'Sani back to Samarach, however, there are a few more leads and loose ends.
: We need all the help we can get, I guess, if this Zehir's really a god - or, uh, 'sufficiently powerful to be reasonably likened to a hypothetical deity'.
: Thank you for being understanding.



: So I can't help but notice that all our 'preparations' so far have been somewhat vague. We could be gearing up to take on a god or preparing for a rich retirement.
: It may prove difficult to ensure the latter without securing the former.
: Bwuh?
: We gotta make the bad god go bye-bye before Cornelius can go fishing.
: Why not fish with bad guys?
: As a reconciliation tactic?
: As bait.



: 'Nother cottage in woods! Woods popular place, full of parties too.
: I wouldn't expect much of a party at this particular cottage, Beef. There is but one resident so far as my research indicates.
: Hopefully he wasn't a regular at that bard get-together we trashed, then.



: Awww, old man look lonely.
: If he is, I sense it is not by choice.
: He goes by the moniker "Skull crusher", and was once allegedly a powerful adventurer. He may be of some use to us, or possibly a hazard if not delicately handled.



: In that case we had best handle ourselves with extreme care.



: Oh no! I tried to warn you!
: What? Agda just wanted to hear some stories!
: What did you do this time, you brat?! We're doomed!



: Losing… feeling in my… legs…
: So… bored…
: Beef saw whole life flash before eyes - and life not even Beef's!
: Right! He's out of stories! Quick, grab his gift, smile and nod, and let's get the hell out of here!
: Cornelius, you endured that monologue much better than I expected.
: I cast Hold Person on myself repeatedly just to stay on my feet.



: I had hoped Skull crusher might have known something useful to our predicament, or be able to offer his assistance in a physical capacity. Or at least not so much in a verbal one.
: Ye gods it's night time. He talked the day away.
: Please tell us our next lead is somewhat more invigorating?



: Behold; a burial mound, forgotten in the depths of Neverwinter Wood. My research suggests-
: Who wants to be what we find living in there? Or, rather, unliving?
: Ooooh! Ooooh! Gnomes! It Gnomes?


: Oh, sorry Beef, it's the undead. Just like it always is in every grave-related location in the world.
: Undead are thematic! Can't have a cemetery or tomb without some undead shuffling around.



: While I agree with your general views on graveyards, let us leave this argument and concentrate on the task at hand. I must repay a debt in cold, decaying blood.



: Oh, don't be such a worry-wart. These minor undead are still flammable. More like nuisances than enemies.



: Okay, so where's that barrow you mentioned then? At the back of the cave?
: Hehehe! Barrow is funny word! Barrow barrow barrow
: The, ugh, crypt is in the back, yes. My sources suggest it is quite old, hence why our surroundings look like a common cave.



: These tombs… they are a mix of old and new. The stone sarcophagi show the weight of ages, but those wooden coffins look to be recent additions.
: There may be a reason this barrow-
: Hehehe!
: -was left undisturbed. Use caution.



: Oh dear. A vampire. I suppose that's why.
: Get back! I shall slay the fiend!
: Pffft, it's just a vampire. No need to get all dramatic on us.



: Vengeance has come!
: Vengeance? Really? Do you actually know if this vampire's done anything?
: It is a vampire. The need for vengeance is a fairly safe bet.



: Uh oh, vamp-lady's boyfriend's pissed.
: Oh like it would be so hard for him to find another girl. Goddamn co-dependent bloodsuckers!
: For my own part I have never understood this modern obsession with vampires.



: They do, however, sparkle quite wondrously when exposed to scorching rays and searing flame.



: It is done. A wrong has been righted, I assume.
: Yeah, handy side-benefit that I guess. So do we root through their pockets, or something?
: Ugh, do not be so vulgar, Pick. We are here to loot their graves.
: I am once again forced to move another action from my "requires avenging" column to my "sort of a grey area" column.



: Beef bored with dead people and old people, next stop we do something fun maybe? Or maybe take bathroom break?
: I told you to go before we left the barrow.
: *sigh*
: Anyway, our last stop this evening is to deal with a powerful party like our own. They would make unlikely allies, but leaving a dangerous group of pirates alive in our wake would-
: Wait wait wait, back up for a second. Pirates? We're going after pirates?



: Wooooooooooooo!
: Pick? Do you have any insight here?
: She… really likes pirates.



: Oh bother. Come on, we best catch up before she signs on to their crew.



: I fail to see how these men differ from common, muck-squatting bandits beyond that they ply their trade at sea.



: I suppose they are also somewhat easier to kill than we are used to.



: Were we supposed to… I don't know, do anything there?
: I believe in a policy of proportionate response, where exerting my own effort is a sort of option of last resort.
: Anything but work, huh? I can see your point.



: Look, Agda! Girl pirate! Agda ask how can join too?
: Agda knows how to become a pirate! Don't need no stinking competish stealing Agda's shtick though…



: As fun as this all is, apparently, let's try to hurry along a bit.
: I couldn't agree more. These scurvy-ravaged wastrels are a waste of my talents.




: Taste the vengeance of Hoar!
: Again with the vengeance? So pirates are like vampires now?

: Look, there are certain professions that carry an implicit need for retribution. It is all plainly laid out in Hoarish doctrine-
: Pfffffft whorish doctrine!

: I am not having this discussion.



: Sooo, how are you these days?
: Oh fine, fine. A lot better, actually. Ever since we moved into the merchant headquarters I've been getting a lot more bedrest.
: I can relate. Those cold nights, sleeping under the stars, kind of makes you regret storming out of a steady job just so you can freelance.
: I tried the freelancing thing in my younger days, you know. Before I got tenure. It really does build character but you grow out of it. You can't eat pride forever.
: Waaaagh! Heronyus! Corneeylus! Look at Beef! Loooook! Beef got 'nother pirate!
: That's great, Beef! Keep it up.
: Awww, Heronyus not lookiiiiiiing!



: Do you think that party of importance you mentioned is in here?
: Somebody important must be, look at all them bottles.
: I had been told a party of pirate adventurers on our level of power were hiding here, but would they really designate rank with rum?
: Clearly Cornelius hasn't read as many pirate novels as Agda.



: Hells yes, awesome pirate krew!
: They don't look very happy to see us…
: Whoever is?



: That was a tactically sound falsehood, Heronius.
: You should know me by now. My lying is a matter of principle.



: Ohmigods we're being attacked by real dashing swashbuckling pirates! This is the best night ever!
: I wish I could be so happy about impending violence.
: You mean you're not?



: *gasp* Orc is bigger than Beef! Taller! Broader!
: Say it ain't so, Beef! Are you going to be okay?
: Of course! It honour to beat up bigger Orc! Beef treasure memory always. Memory and maybe teeth.
: Speaking of treasure, calling dibs-no-challenge on the captain's hat!



: Now is the time to unleash our magical support!
: If you want to end this fight quickly, I suppose. Let me just disintegrate their archer, there.
: Wow, Heronius's becoming a real ladykiller!
: Sounds better than "manslaughterer", I suppose.



: Speaking of murder, I am not entirely comfortable killing this priestess of Talos. She stands alone.
: I have a scroll of flesh to stone, if you prefer. We could leave her as a monument to our passing.
: I've actually been branching into Necromancy on the side a bit, if you're interested.
: Never mind, now that I think about it what is one more dead clergyman on my bloodied hands?
: Ugh, quit harshing Agda's pirate-fight buzz.



: This's more like it! Time to get knee-deep in booty!
: I see a number of potential assets in our fight against Zehir, it is only a pity we had to kill our way to them.
: A violent outcome was likely inevitable. At least now we are assured we leave no dangerous wild cards behind us on the Sword Coast.
: Hey, Heronius! Where are you going?
: Getting knee-deep in booty!



: So, my fine pirate wenches. Have no fear, the dashing captain Napalm IX is here to whisk you away to safety.
: Heronyus! Stay away from pretty girls! Corneylus not cast Protection From Cooties!
: …Any chance any of you find looking after adorable, dependant man-children to be cute and attractive? No? Never mind then.


{Some strange cuts occured at the end here, re-added those bits just now}