Part 138: Episode CXXXIII: Grin

Episode CXXXIII: Grin


Music: Bipolar Nightmare



Kill! KILL!
Huh? Who are they!?
Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha hah!



Welp. We’re jumping right into it here! Time to battle Ko-Shi, the newest in the spider-mech orb series of bosses. Ko-Shi is named for the Japanese pronunciation of the Chinese philosopher Kongzi aka Confucius. You may have heard of that dude somewhere before so I won’t get into his deal...





Ko-Shi is not quite as chill as Confucius what with the regular volleys of heat seeking rockets aimed in A2’s general direction. That said... it does just kind of sit there and chill out watching her run away from rockets otherwise. Really... it’s only the rockets.





For you see, this isn’t actually a real boss battle. Ko-Shi buggers off back through the same hole in the roof it made smashing into the Library once its HP drops below 75%. The Red Girls were really just stalling A2 while they were busy fucking with 9S on the other side of the Tower revealing YoRHa’s dark secrets and whatnot. Sorry for the inconvenience, A2. They’ll be with you shortly.


Music: Alien Manifestation (Vocal)



Now that Ko-Shi has left this weird reconstruction of an important area from the original game, a door has unlocked. This leads into what was the Library’s basement in NieR 1. We never actually got to see what it looked like down there. The only time it was ever opened was to stuff the rampaging End of Disc 1 Boss in and seal it away for half a decade. The only other time it was opened was letting that same boss out again to almost instantly have Papa Nier own the shit out of to prove how much tougher he’d gotten after five years straight of fighting Shades.





Gonna be honest... not really impressed with the basement so far. At least there’s no regenerating black spaghetti monsters hanging out. Small thanks.



Rounding the corner, A2 comes upon an ominous looking pedestal in the center of the area.



A2, being a dumb idiot, decides the best course of action is to curiously smush her palm all over it and hope for the best. Pod 042, you really need to start getting more active in dissuading your android from doing dumb shit like this...


Video: Click here to watch the rest of update contents


Music: Copied City



Alert: Enemy hacking detected. Proposal: Retreat immediately.



Sorry, no can do. A2 isn’t trained in exiting hacking programs. She’s probably... no definitely the type that still hunt and pecks when typing on a keyboard. Alt-F4ing out of a program is nerd moon speak as far as she’s concerned.



As A2 ventures further into hacking space the perspective eventually shifts to behind her back. That’s always a sign of good things to come. Sure enough, as soon as she reaches the end of the path she comes upon...



Who ARE you!?
Good to see you again... Number Two. Or should we call you A2 now? This does bring back memories. Though to concepts like us, time has little meaning. Still, when we wiped out your forces, it made quite the impression on us. YoRHa attacker model Number Two... An experimental, disposable group created as a test run for Project YoRHa.
Shut up!



The Red Girls are now hostile entities. They’ve only got a single attack -- a broad swiping motion in A2’s general direction. It hits for very little damage if it connects. Though it does seem to be a guaranteed stagger on A2.



The hologram assholes go down themselves in just a single hit from anything. Melee attacks, Pod Programs or Pod Fire. They’re all instantly vaporized if the attack connects.





The problem is the Red Girls almost instantly respawn as soon as one is destroyed. On top of that, even more are spawning in all directions to overwhelm A2. But that’s not going to stop her from trying to kill them. Frankly, murdering these jerks is probably one point of contention A2 and 9S could probably agree upon despite their differences.

A minute or so of fruitless flailing and...



Didn’t we say that you can’t kill us?
God damn it!



I don’t think A2 gets the concept of holograms. But she’s going to continue to try to stab ‘em none the less. The Red Girls at this point back off their swiping attack pattern and shift to the tried and true attack of all enemies in the NieR franchise – shooting energy orbs. They also gain more HP so it takes a couple strikes to take one of ‘em down.

After another thirty seconds or so of wasting time attempting to murder light projections, Pod 042 finally decides to give A2 a strategy readjustment.



What now!?
Utilize the enemy’s logic learning function to formulate a weakness.
I don’t know what that means!
This Pod has serious concerns about unit A2’s cognitive abilities.
SHUT UP AND EXPLAIN IT ALREADY!
Said strategy would interrupt the enemy’s logic circuits, causing a computational delay.
Meaning what!?



Huh!?
Striking at the logic circuit requires a certain number of enemies to remain extant for a certain period of time.
Oh, what the hell...





Yep. We’re now got to stop attacking the Red Girls to progress. They will continue to spawn in and shoot energy orbs in A2’s direction. The Evasive System plug-in chip (time slows down when near enemy projectiles) is pretty handy here if you’re not great at avoiding slow moving orbs from all directions.

Pod 042 will keep us updated on the machine network getting overloaded with Red Girl duplicates.



It’s all so very amusing...



The androids the human race left behind acted as if they wanted to be human. The machine lifeforms the aliens left behind acted as if they wanted to be human. We resemble each other so, but we are networked, and thus we are superior to you.
Hypothesis: The enemy’s defensive system is prompting an evolution of its logic.
Foolish androids... Why do you resist? All things end with accepting death, do they not?



Avoiding orbs at this point is getting a wee bit hairy given there’s about three or four dozen Red Girls shooting projectiles from all sides. It’s probably good they gave A2 that weird gliding dodge with the bonus i-frames.



...You know the last time I saw a fifty story girl in a red dress it was a real bad scene for everyone involved.



We are finite, and yet we are infinite. We are the embodiment of the perfect being.
Hypothesis: The enemy has become aware of the diversity of life.



We move on... Forward... To the future!



Hypothesis: The enemy’s consciousness has begun to fracture.



At this point everything involving the machines just... stops. The Red Girls. The energy orbs. They all freeze in place. A2 is just happy to stop dodging junk finally.





After a few moments of heavy contemplation, the Red Girl holograms all wink out of existence one by one. And...



Music: ENDS



We need more evolutionary pressure. If we allow this android to continue living, we can create even more hardship for ourselves. Overcoming the crisis this creates will present an opportunity for our kind to evolve even further.



We disagree. This android is dangerous. It must be destroyed immediately.
.....



Those who would doubt our victory...



...are enemies.








Music: The Tower





What the—!?
Analysis: The saturated consciousnesses are now in conflict with each other.
Huh...
......
They’re acting like humans...





All we have to do is sit back and watch the Red Girls civil war as they proceed to bitch slap each other out of existence. I’m personally rooting for the psychotic grin faction.



Not that it particularly matters since A2 will mop up whatever few survivors remain once both sides’ numbers are depleted. That’s a wrap for the Red Girls manifestation of the Machine Lifeform Terminal (their actual official name according to the Unit Data for Red Girls.) They’re not dead yet, mind you. They just won’t be appearing as creepy little girls in red dresses anymore.



Music: ENDS



Back to the real world after that little detour. The pedestal A2 activated to get into that whole side mess sinks into the floor.



Turns out that was an extremely elaborate, booby-trapped elevator button she hit as the entire platform rises up and begins ascending.



OK... well now it’s moving at more of an angle. So I guess it’s more of a high-tech funicular than an elevator. But det—





Oh... right... We never did sort out this thing. Tune in next time for the final battle against the machine lifeforms! Don’t let the recycled boss design fool you. It’s one of the coolest boss fights in the game.






Video: Episode 133 Highlight Reel (You should definitely watch this.)





Red Girls Concept Art – Everyone knows long, straight hair is the evilest option.



Red Girls Render – The machines never did figure out how the hell ties and knots work. Neck ties... shoe laces... it’s a confounding human enigma that eludes them to this day.