Part 35: Episode XXXIV: Existence Precedes Essence

Episode XXXIV: Existence Precedes Essence



That last quest was really cute. Let’s move on to something far less pleasant. Hey, remember how I insisted everyone should wait until unlocking Fast Travel before doing most sidequests? Guess what? That’s almost entirely because of this garbage task.



To progress in this quest, we now need to track down Jean-Paul’s other two followers in the amusement park and desert regions. Still... not entirely sure why we’re doing this, other than 9S being curious and 2B being too apathetic about the whole affair to shoot him down just yet. Anyhow, the Amusement Park trek isn’t too bad. We could easily dash over there in 3-5 minutes tops.


Music: Amusement Park (Vocal)



The Jean-Paul follower we want is located in the central part of the main Amusement Park street on the opposite side of the gated area leading off to Pascal’s Village. This is apparent “Machine With a Dream”. Sure...



Hello. Do you know of a machine named Jean-Paul who lives in the village?
Master Jean-Paul is quite the mysterious gentleman. One might go so far as to call him suspicious. And yet he’s so alluring all the same!
Suspicious... and alluring?
Exactly. And I know just the gift for someone of that description! You’ll deliver it to him straightaway, won’t you? I won’t let that terrible girl in the desert find a way to interfere with our love!





OK... The Machine with a Dream gives us a hunk of glass as a gift for Jean-Paul. I’m sure this has a deep meaning. I was never much for philosophy study...


Music: Pascal



Regardless, back to Pascal’s Village we go to deliver the goods to Jean-Paul and see his reaction. Maybe this time it’ll be a bit less... dismissively assholish?



Moments are transitory. One cannot possess them. A moment passed is a moment lost; a symbol of idle, unrestrained apathy that—
Can you please just take this present already?
A gift? Let me see.
Here you go.
Ah, yes. Fascinating...
The machine who gave this to us said you were both “suspicious” and “alluring.”
It seems this so-called “gift” is nothing more than a piece of unadorned glass. Therefore, I can only surmise that—
Um, do you want us to bring a message back to the woman who gave this to you?
For a mere trifle? No.
Okay then.
Let’s go.


Music: Memories of Dust (Vocal)



Right, then. Another waste of our time. Perhaps the third one will be the charm in getting Jean-Paul to stop being a dick. The final admirer of JP is hanging is indeed hanging out in the desert. More specifically, the Desert Housing region. Hopefully they’ve cleaned up the corpse resurrecting weirdo and his Frankensteined son’s bodies from our previous sidequest in the area.





The machine we want is straight north of the Desert Housing Access Point, hanging around the corner with four other non-hostile desert machines.



The four generic machines all are apparently named “Wife Machine” and hiss about the androids being outsiders and freaks. Don’t ask me what this is all about. If it’s some kinda reference, it’s gone over my head. Let’s speak with the one with a unique outfit, the “Machine in Love” as it likes to be called.



Ack!
Huh?
You came here from Master Jean-Paul’s village, didn’t you? I can tell. I can smell him on you. *sniiiiiiiiff* Ahhhh!
Okay. That’s weird.
Jean-Paul is wonderful. He pursues new knowledge with a passion that is almost indescribable. I admire him as I do no other.
You have issues.
And YOU clearly lack a discerning eye. I bet men take advantage of you all the time.
Not exactly.
Ah, right. I found something that Master Jean-Paul is sure to be interested in. Please take it to him with all speed!





I suppose when there’s been a war waged between assorted robots for several times longer than recorded human history, fossilized machine parts would start becoming a thing. I somehow doubt Jean-Paul is going to be interested in its historical significance...



What?
Do you think this *BLEEP* fellow is being a little too... I dunno. Glorified?
That’s certainly one way to put it...



So I mentioned having to change Sartre’s name to Jean-Paul due his estate being extremely litigious. Turns out Square-Enix’s legal department didn’t catch that until after the English voice acting had already been recorded. So instead of getting 9S’s VA in to re-record a single line of dialog in a sidequest, they just bleeped it out. Which to me is funny, as I like to pretend 9S was just getting fed up and called Jean-Paul a fucker. Despite that, I’m sure there’s an angry rambling internet post somewhere screeching about censorship in localization and how dare they and also this is somehow women’s fault.

Anyway, back to that fuckhead Jean-Paul...


Music: Pascal



We’re here with a present for you.
A present? Of what sort?
It’s a fossil. One of your followers asked us to deliver it to you.
I see. I see.
She said you were “indescribably passionate” when it came to learning. Or something like that.
A mechanical fossil. No use at all.
Do you want us to tell her anything on your behalf, or...
I’ll not waste words on mere junk.
Junk!?
......



I suppose we should go tell his followers exactly what he thinks of them, huh? They’ll be waiting for some kind of reply.



Riiiiight... So here’s the second half of this quest: Go back to all three followers and speak to them a second time. Yep, definitely didn’t want to stab this prick through his top hat and into his brain box by the time I was done doing this quest before obtaining Fast Travel. No sir...

Oh well... At least one of the machines are still in the village. Let’s hit them up first...



Actually, he said it wasn’t worthy of a response.
I KNEW it! Isn’t he the greatest? I can’t get enough of him.
You don’t say...
......
I won’t let those other women beat me to the punch—I must write Master Jean-Paul a new letter at once!


Music: Amusement Park (Vocal)



Why do I get the feeling all three machine ladies are going to be thrilled to be getting rejected? Oh well, who am I to judge? Let’s just get this over with...



I must know what he said!
Well, he said it was a mere trifle.
Such insight! Such truth! He sees to the core of things in a way others cannot! I shall follow you for the rest of my days, Master Jean-Paul!
That’s a long time.
......
Oh, Master Jean-Paul... What must I do to claim your attentions...?


Music: Memories of Dust (Vocal)



Thank goodness for fast travel. You know how goddamn far it is from here to Pascal’s Village on foot...?



He called it a useless piece of junk.
Such cruelty! I’ve barely the words for it! When I think about his wanton sadism, it makes me... Oooooooh.
......
......
You seem quite friendly with Master Jean-Paul... See that you don’t steal him away from me!



No worries there, lady. After our follow-up chat with all three admires, Jean-Paul’s Melancholy updates. Seems we need to return to the jerk one final time...


Music: Pascal



This had better result in Jean-Paul tumbling down a comically long flight of stairs. Or at least 9S getting his top hat as an accessory.



Goddammit! Did we miss him topple down the stairs? No satisfaction in this quest. None. I don’t care if Jean-Paul vanishing from existence having accomplished nothing would be the most appropriate end to this story arc.



If you’re looking for Jean-Paul, you’re too late. He set out on “a journey.”
A journey, huh?
Yes. He said he needed to go find himself or... something. Oh, but he left a letter for you. Here.



A letter, huh? Funny, he doesn’t seem like the type. Let’s take a look at its text...



...Now this. This here checks out. You goddamn piece of shit machine. I hope one of those terrible electric worm machines rends you asunder on your journey.



Platinum Games is soft. If Cavia still were around that letter would have been the only quest reward for completing this nonsense. Not that I’m longing for those days of trolling bullshit, mind you.



I wonder if all his followers being female had something to do with his weirdness. Did the human sexes interact with each other like this? Who knows...
Who knows...



And that’s it! If you’re looking for some deeper meaning to this quest... naw dawg! There isn’t one. Yoko Taro or one of the other writers had to study Sartre’s work in college or something. They had a goddamn axe to grind about how they thought he was a huge dick and you should too. That’s it! That was the quest!

You know what...? Mission accomplished! Fuck Jean-Paul Sartre!






Video: Episode 34 CENSORSHIP! (Edit: Pfft hahaha.)