Part 88: Episode LXXXVI: A Wise Man Once Said...

Episode LXXXVI: A Wise Man Once Said...



We’re getting there with these sidequests. We actually don’t have a whole lot left. Indeed, despite the four dots present in the City Ruins region there’s only two quests left there. And the one we’re doing today doesn’t even count...


Music: Rays of Light (Quiet)



I’m not sure what the deal is with this series of events. Three of the blips on the map are tied to this unmarked quest, despite every other map blip belonging to an actual real-deal quest (the Golden Machines or finding 2B’s old equipment early in Route A were unmarked quests that didn’t get map blips.) For some reason, the aforementioned map markers will vanish if we’re in the vicinity of where they ought to be. Also, this quest will respawn in Route C (or spoilers: when we get to return to earlier points in the game) which is... strange and kinda feels like a bug.



Following the reshaping of the City Ruins area, three “Wise Machines” now appear in high up places on the eastern half of the map. The first is located up the tower between the shopping mall ruins and the path to the Amusement Park. Let’s see just how wise this machine is...



Hellooo? Anybody home in there?
......
Come on. I know you can hear me. What are you doing here?
......
Analysis: Scans indicate no mechanical malfunctions in this unit. Therefore, it must be deliberately ignoring you.
So it’s gonna be like that, is it?



9S, being the eternal busybody that he is, sees no other recourse than forcible cracking into this machines brain to discover why it’s chilling out enjoying this nice view from up high. I kinda wish this was a companion piece to the Jackass E-Drugs quest and this machine was just baked out of its gourd. But...




Music: City Ruins (Chiptune)



My... life’s meaning... The meaning... of being born...



There’s no enemies in this hacking bit and the core’s shield is destroyed as soon as it’s done talking. Alright, then...




Music: Rays of Light (Quiet)



Was it seriously trying to figure out the meaning of existence?
Negative: Machine lifeforms do not possess such thought routines.
Well, yeah, but...



Welp. Nothing further to be done with that machine. We’ll just climb down and let him enjoy pondering the meaning of life, the universe and everything.



The next Wise Machine is precariously perched on the edge of some overpass rubble above the sinkhole caused by the Engels unit exploding earlier. Let’s see if this one is a bit chattier...



......
That seems like a big fat no. Guess it won’t mind if I hack my way inside...



Scanner type androids have no sense of personal space or invasion of privacy. I mean, 9S does have access to 2B’s email account like a creep. But that’s an ethics discussion for another time. Let’s see what’s kicking around in this tin can’s head.




Music: City Ruins (Chiptune)



Merely destroying life will not win me approval... But if so... what use are we to the world...? It is painful... So painful...



Once more, there are no hostile targets and the shield on the final core orb goes down as soon as the machine finishes pondering its existence. So, what’s your hot take on this one 9S...?


Music: Rays of Light (Quiet)



It’s in pain because it can’t find value in its own existence? It wants to know why it’s here? Why it exists? ...And what about me? Why am I here? What do I—
Alert: Hacking has resulted in an alignment of synaptic transmissions.
...Oh. R-Right. Sorry. I just... I’d better be more careful next time.



9S, try not to fry your brain or, worse yet, turn into a navel gazing nihilistic douchebag thanks to jumping into idle machines’ heads because you’re bored and they’re not yammering with you. That would be real dumb. Do you want to turn into a Seymour Guado, 9S? Your lanky neck couldn't even support the weight of that idiotic hairdo, you fool!



The last of the Wise Machines has taken a position on a toppled building at the edge of the central crater, just south of the Resistance Camp pond. If you’re curious, the order these machines are encountered doesn’t matter. It’ll be the same sequential conversations even if we started with this one and ended with the one in the radio tower.



......
All right, that’s enough small talk. Time to root around and see what’s what.



9S, you started getting infected by the machine’s thoughts in the last hack and that barely had anything deep to say. Pod 153, you’ve got nothing to dissuade him? I already know we can’t count on 2B to speak up...

Tch... fine. Let’s do it.




Music: City Ruins (Chiptune)



Why is life... so painful...? Why won’t anyone... help me...? I don’t need... this world...



There’s more cores to crack this go around. But as before, there’s no resistance from the machine’s hardware and the final shield automatically deactivates as soon as it’s done pondering aloud.


Music: Rays of Light (Quiet)



9S’s head sparks and he takes some damage this go around. This dingus is the type to stick a fork in an electric socket once and then attempt several more times to determine just how far he can get it into the socket before getting shocked.



Alert: Abnormalities detected in vital signs. Pulse rate nearing dangerous levels.
I’m all right...

My dude, I’ve played the rest of this Yoko Taro game. You are far from all right. But for now, the final Wise Machine finally speaks and... it seems someone cranked the machine lifeform voice filter to max for this poor machine because it sounds like a Dalek talking through a tin cup and string that was then recorded on a Yak Bak.



To eliminate all others and reside at the pinnacle of existence! Yet the battle rages eternal! Our cursed cycle of destruction and rebirth continues without end! None of us in this world are loved! This world has no need for us! There is only one solution...





...So it leaps to its death. If we’d finished with either of the other two Wise Machines, they too would commit suicide. Considering they’re all gone now, they probably did just that too.



And... err... that’s the end of the unmarked quest! No reward. No nothing. Life is meaningless, after all. At least as far as those machines concluded.





Edit: It seems 9S can opt to jump down after the Wise Machine. Turns out it drops a (almost entirely useless) chip that buffs hijacked machines the whole three times you'll ever do that in a playthrough. I had to reload this quest three times for it not to clip through the ground on impact, so that was fun! I think it was better when I thought there was no reward.

Tune in next time for some lighter subject matter... like a murder mystery! NieR: Automata's sidequest conga line continues!






Video: Episode 86 Highlight Reel (You should probably watch this.)





City Ruins Crater Concept Art – I suppose it’s good there isn’t all that water pouring into it in the final game. I could see that causing logistical issues with exploration.