Part 8: TV Station
Time to air a totally radical subversive videotape!!Fresh from his wholesale destruction of the M.I.N.T. Mall, Kent finds himself outside the Neutropolis TV Station, looking to broadcast a video of his musical idol, Brian Deluge.

A bouncer awaits Kent, along with some kind of... is that a pile of dirt there on the bottom right?


Yup, a filthy stack of mud. Naturally, Kent is keen to add this to his ever-growing collection of horrible inventory items.


Kent, honestly man. You have issues we really need to talk about. It's not good man.

Even the bouncer is horrified by Kent's actions. I love the angry glare he's got going here. It sets the pocket rose off very nicely.


Oh God, don't refer to Kent's face as furniture, he'll probably break it in half. Kent keeps pushing...


Yeah, but then nobody would be able to get into the TV station and you'd probably be fired. Kent decides to change tack. By which I mean he decides to get stroppy, like he always does when things don't go his way.


This isn't working. Kent tries again.



By now Kent is dovetailing into full-on whinge mode.


Okay, so the hint here is that the bouncer dude associates rats and vermin with badness. Therefore he must be deathly afraid of rats. Hey don't look at me, I didn't write this crap, I'm just telling you how it is.

Of course, we could just use the rat in a box we have, but let's test the theory first.
Rat Puppet (0:15) - Kent shoves his hand inside the rat puppet and approaches the bouncer, who recoils in horror like... well. Actually, like nothing ever has before. Whoever they paid to do the motion capture stuff should have apologised and given the money back. Seriously, watch the way this bouncer dude moves.

Okay, so clearly he finds rats disgusting. Fortunately, Kent is the master of disgusting things!
Rat (0:44) - Kent offers the bouncer a gift - one baked vermin in a box. It turns out this is The Mouse That Roared, and the bouncer hightails it.
Also note that the voice actor for the bouncer in the above clip speaks so quietly you literally can't hear him under the music. I had to set the music to one of the lowest levels, record the scene, then pump up the video volume just to make it possible to hear what he says. That's called quality control, kiddies!

Having disposed of the bouncer, Kent heads inside the station.

Hahaha. Actually it's one of the more detailed sprites in this game.


I'm sure the feeling is mutual, Kent.

Kent strolls into the manager's room.

The poodle with sunglasses says it all for this room, really. I like the way the wall is made up of wooden planks of completely random widths.

Kent attempts to speak with Mr. Johnson, but is quickly cut down.


Kent decides to chat up the secretary instead. And I do mean chat up.





Don't fret Kent, perhaps you can try to clumsily hit on Mr. Johnson instead. Kent decides to get down to business.


There isn't any bodybuilding boyfriend, is there? She just plain doesn't like Kent.



Of course, it's not like the studio is just sitting open or anything, it's locked up tight and nobody is around to let you in. Clearly this is something she should actually be helping us with, and she's just giving us the cold shoulder. Maybe next time Kent shouldn't open with his sleazy attempts to pick up taken women. He attempts to remedy this situation.




...he's right there. He's heard the entire conversation.


"He's free after this game, if you know what I mean."





Well, can't blame Kent for trying I guess. She is the least whacked-out girl we've seen in Neutropolis so far, I guess.

Now that we've gone through that farce, we can actually speak with Mr. Johnson about airing our illegal, rebel videotape. There is no way this could blow up in our faces or anything.
Also I love the "GEE AIN'T I GREAT" belt buckle





Aaaand here we go. Time for the shit to hit the fan. Kent however manages to think on his feet surprisingly well for a moron.




You're just standing there smoking a fucking cigar, you're not busy at all. Certainly not too busy to actually check what's on the videotape that was brought to you by a creep like Kent. I'm actually kind of pissed off that worked.

What the fuck is with that painting? For a supposedly "normal" city where freedom of thought is penalised by law, this place is pretty damn fruity.

There are two studio doors, both of which can be opened by Mr. Johnson's ID card. We'll try Studio 2 first.

There appears to be some kind of show being filmed in here. That's a serious chin on that host down there!

Let's look into Studio 1 instead.

Now we're talking. A bunch of broadcasting equipment, and nobody in sight. Kent springs into action!

The upper VT Machine already has a tape in it, and it's actually impossible to eject it. Fortunately, the lower one is empty. Kent slides in the tape...

...and fires up the hardware.

Uh oh, password protection.

Haha, looks like Kent is fucked after all, unless that turd he picked up out the front is going to help him in some obscure, ridiculous manner.

Kent decides to head off to the technician's lab. Perhaps he can figure out the password in there.

Well would you look at that. Kent has now been bumped to only the third nerdiest guy in Neutropolis.

Let's see whether he knows the password!


This is off to a typically good start.



Way to really drill the guy, Kent. Let's try this again...




Surely that would never happen!!


Thank you. Finally someone who recognises that Kent does not look anything like the typical citizen of Neutropolis, and is distrustful as a result. Of course, he has given away the location of his password in the process.


We'll come back to this guy in a minute, but for now let's see what else we can find in this room.


Yes, I'm sure your job of standing around and watching the coffee machine is vital to the operation of the TV Station.

Kent comes face to face with a fax machine, and starts rambling on and on about God only knows what.



Will you shut the fuck up, Kent?! Jesus Christ.
Okay, so the techy dude obviously has his password on his ID badge, which is on his pristine white shirt. Kent hatches a sneaky plan.
Dirty Shirt (0:21) - Kent pulls out his beloved turd, and throws it at the technician. Yes, he flings the poo, as though he were some kind of fucking monkey. One guess as to whether he bothers to even wash his hands afterwards, too. The technician demands that Kent take it to be cleaned, but forgets to take off the ID badge.
In case you were wondering, yes, the clod of dirt also would have worked. I just wanted to make sure I got that literal pile of shit out of the damn inventory.

Midway back to the TV room, Kent realises that he has no reason to keep the filthy shirt, and just ditches it.


Continuing to walk back to the studio, Kent studies the badge.

Whatever you say, Kent Knutson.

Surely this isn't going to work...

Okay, so yes, Holen is indeed the password for the TV system. That is what is known today as "a shitty password".

Kent loads the Deluge video he placed in the second VT Machine earlier, and we're in business.
Brian Deluge (1:02) - The Brian Deluge video plays during the broadcast of the day time talk show. Brian actually does a better job than I would have expected, not that I was expecting very much. He could really do with a decent songwriter, though.
Those lyrics, as best as I can make out, are complete nonsense.
Don't ask yourself too many questions
Don't think I'm mad if you do (or maybe Don't think 'em out if you do?)
'Cause it's one less shrink, makes you sound good,
And road trip is gonna hit youuuuu, ow!
LIGHTNING ROD!
Brian Deluuuuuge, with the song of the apocalypse!
It's not obvious, but the basic chords here are the same as for the Normality theme song, which Kent whistles a version of at the start of the game. I guess this must be the Deluge track he was referring to.

"You're a functional adult!" Also, hahaha, I love the balloons and "WELL DONE KENT!" banners around here. Dai is still here too, but again has no lines whatsoever in this scene. I don't think we can even blame this on the paint anymore. More than likely there was some kind of brain parasite in the mould on that kettle.
Hopefully Brian will finally take a liking to Kent now that we aired his stuff for him.

Oh well, so much for that idea.



To be fair to Brian, this group really couldn't withstand any kind of reaction, even the most minimal, from the Norm troopers.



Smooth, Kent. He keeps on going, though.


No, seriously Heather, Kent is right on this one. You really should have some kind of weapons, or defences, or something.



Again, nothing stopping you from just heading back inside the Plush-Rest factory and grabbing the specs, Kent. They're right there, unguarded. Only one Norm trooper in the entire factory. No? Never mind then.
Heather does have an idea, however.



Wait, "not-quite-dead"? Didn't he explode into a million tiny pieces or something?


You got that from a note written in gravy? I can't imagine Heather did any kind of DNA testing or anything. I think this is just a wild guess.


Oh, great plan. Excellent plan. Let's stage a jailbreak. I think this was Brian's plan, actually. He just wants to get rid of us. Kent is very unsure about this plan.


"Also, if it fails, we don't have to put up with you anymore. It's win-win!"


I'm not sure if you've noticed Heather, but Dai doesn't exactly seem to have all his faculties at the moment. Even Kent can see this is an insane plan.




I think he's probably just still high from inhaling all those yellow paint fumes.


Even Heather can't make this sound convincing.



This is a terrible, terrible plan.
Will Kent survive the Ordinary Outpost? Is Saul really still alive? Will Dai regain the ability to form words? Stay tuned!!