The Let's Play Archive

Parasite Eve 2

by Crowetron

Part 46: Episode 45: Dead Aim

Okay, so it looks like Pyrokinesis, Metabolism, and Healing are our winners, with Pyro just barely edging out Apobiosis by one vote. And once again, Antibody comes in dead last with one little vote. Can't say I blame you guys, it is a pretty crap spell.

These changes will go into effect next update, because we got a fresh new update comin' up RIGHT NOW

Last time on Parasite Eve, we learned that the Shelter is sitting on top of some sort of artificial jungle called the Neo Ark. Obviously, we want to find out what the fuck is up with that, so that's our new destination. There's just one little thing left to do here in the control room.

Using the security cameras, specifically Camera E, we can shut off the automated turrets. Remember that turrets aren't NMCs in any way, and thus aren't worth BPs when we kill them. You also get a measly 5 or so EXP a pop for one. So this let's us completely ignore the little schmucks without being occasionally shot at. And even if you turn them off, you can still blow up any non-functioning turrets you come across, so there's really no downside to this.

We've also got a lot of new Hot Zones to clear out, so we'll knock that out before heading down to the Ark.

We can also pester Pierce, which is fun.

: I think that pupa-thing is slowly changing color!

Okay, time to get to work.

Oh hey, two slow enemies standing in a straight line!

Necrosis easily fucks up both their days

And then Aya murders them. It's hard out here for a Mossback.

This is interesting. Remember Bowman? Well, the kind of ANMC he turned into, the Brain Stingers, are now normal enemies! They're still high health foes with the ability to dish out a lot of damage, so you need to use caution...

haha, no I'm just kidding. We can just poison them and let the magic of DoTs take care of everything for us. For funsies, let's assume Aya is paralyzed with laughter instead of...y'know, paralysis.

Unlike Bowman, proper Brain Stingers can also inflict Blindness. This is worth nothing, but ultimately pointless, because Necrosis is so, so great.

In the dormitories, we find a few more Mad Strangers. Apparently, that pipe-swinging thing is really catching on.

Sadly, Aya hates fun, so they must all die.

There were actually three of these dudes in here, all just minding they're own business, swingin' like it ain't no thang. RIP weird swinging dudes

The Grimace returns for Round 2, but ultimately falls once more because Aya just kinda shot him a bunch.

Oddly enough, every Brain Stinger I've run into is always facing the opposite direction of the door I enter from. Dunno why, but it sure makes it easier to electro-poison them.

See, usually, I don't bother showing Aya's misadventures in Hot Zone Clearing, because it's kinda boring. It's not so bad to play, because wrecking shit up as an artillery toting wizard is always fun, but once the explosions die down, it is basically just backtracking and grinding. I did manage to get a Protein Capsule (max HP boost), and it wasn't even a bonus item from the Medicine Wheel!

Okay, that's probably enough padding out the update HIGH QUALITY ENTERTAINMENT for now, let's scope out this Neo Ark.

Pierce helpfully informs us that we can use that lift that we intentionally activated so that we could use it. If you forgot to turn it on, I think he calls to remind you where and how to activate it, but at the moment he's not super helpful.

After that little bio on Aya in the last update, it's fun to read all her lines in a comically exaggerated Boston accent.

: Roga dat, ya gaywad. GO SOX!

We've seen this lift before, so now it's time to ride it down...


In the Oval Office no less! I'll give you a few guesses as to how this cutscene ends, but there's no way you'll get it.

: Hello, Mr. President?

: What is it?

I like how vague this line is, like the President is just gonna be like "Oh, THAT organization? Of course! Say no more, my friend, since clearly our intelligence agencies are only focused on a single target. What other organization could you possibly be talking about?"

Oh. I guess he did know what he was talking about.

: He's found it.

: I see. Well?

Man, they're probably talking about the Shelter or something related to the Shelter, but wouldn't it be funny if they weren't? Like the game cut to the Oval Office twenty minutes too early and the President is in a meeting about Raccoon City being overrun with zombies or something.

I do like to imagine that all survival horror games take place in the same universe. Like the nation is recovering from the zombie-fication and subsequent nuking of Raccoon City in 98, then the next Christmas an opera singer turns into a flying monster lady and knocks over the Statue of Liberty, and some poor schmuck was gonna write a book about the whole mess, but disappeared in some foggy tourist town on vacation.

Living in survival horror world would be kinda cool, actually. I mean, sure, occasionally you get eaten alive by an unholy abomination, but life would generally be more interesting. Crack teams of elite police officers would be openly hiring people with learning disabilities, the US Military would have teams dedicated to killing dinosaurs, and those crazy Zombie Hunter internet groups would actually have shit to do beyond arguing about the practicality of carrying a katana everywhere.

Oh, shit, is there a cutscene going on? Sorry.

: That SDI relic?

: It's our insurance plan, only.

: If I must...

This game takes place in early 2000, an election year. I like to assume this is the end of Unnamed Generic President's 2nd term, so he doesn't really care too much about what he does anymore.

: Thank you, sir.

"Man, I'm gonna retire and get fuckin' museums named after me. I don't care what the fuck you guys do."

So, what were they talking about?


What, you thought only the Chinese had orbital satellite lasers?

America fuckin' invented orbital lasers!

So, when you saw the Oval Office, did you expect the scene would end with the US powering up a space laser?

Sadly, Goldblum actually meant it when he said this thing was Plan B.

Still might be useful to keep the looming threat of an omnipresent death ray overhead while we fight horse-men in a subterranean Jurassic Park.

God, I love this game.

: Heya, kids! Y'know, I wanted ta talk 'bout a few more o' my pals from da Screen Monsta Guild in dis pictcha, and I managed ta get ahold o' one o' da fellas! Why don'tcha tell 'im 'bout yer role, bud?


: 'Ey, cool it wit' da method actin' dere, champ.

: Ahem. My apologizes, Rattigan, I thought your readers might find it amusing. I know your fans tend to appreciate cheesy gimmicks and the like.

: What da hell is DAT s'ppose ta mean?!

: Haha, calm down, chap, I am merely teasing you. Yes, I remember this project, my one foray onto the screen. I really am more comfortable on stage, you know. Working with Ms. Brea was quite an experience. You would not expect such a lovely young woman to be so crass. The language I heard whenever anything went wrong! I swear, it was nearly the death of me. I was quite fortunate to have a fellow stage actor on set with me, playing the role of Number 9.

: Whoa, cool it wit' da spoilas dere, mac! I don't tink da game's given 'im a name directly yet.

: Then what have they been calling him?

: Ned, I tink.

: That's ludicrous. The set would have been unbearable if not for... "Ned"'s trailer. Do you know how hard it is to get a proper Earl Grey from a Craft Services table? Dreadful. Most of my fellow guild members on set were quite ill-mannered as well. Poorly washed, too. They reminded me of you, Rattigan.

: Alright, dat's enough o' dat. What have ya been doin' since den?

: Well...I had a role in an all-monster production of Shakespeare's The Tempest back in 2002. Critics adored it. The public...did not respond as positively. I auditioned for The Lion King not long ago, and wrote my own treatment for an expressionist rendition of Waiting for Godot that regrettably never got off the ground. Mostly, I've simply been honing my craft and really getting back to my roots as an actor.

: ...You ain't been doin' nothin', have ya?

: I never liked you, Rattigan.

: Ahahaha!