Part 3: I will be very rude to you!

You know, now that I've seen what we're in for, I can't get the Lavender Town theme out of my head. It's like some sort of demented theme song for this game.



Anyway, first order of business is to give myself 99 Mainbals. People want to see Illustrated Handbook entries, dagnabbit! It slipped my mind to actually grasp more than one Elf this update, but starting next time I'll be sure to be diligent.

Also, Bal items are actually washtubs, evidently.



This is the Yedong Cloth, from what I can tell. It honors that a Yedong's gape ended a drought.



There's a Missile Bomb member on guard duty though.



Welcome to Ridu Town, "where people and Elfs live harmony", according to the welcome sign. The main attraction is Steel, who is an expert washtub craftsman.



Another Missile Bomb member blocks the Gymnasium, but tells us that Yedong tails are a good thing to buy.



Shaotanzhiten sounds like a move Akuma would use.



The speaker can't learn the chop stunt, but Shaotan (the actual name of the guy in question) can teach people.



Missile Bomb has captured all the Yedongs in Ridu Town! The fiends!



Steel has psychic powers, knowing Terry's name at a glance.



However, they've rendered him as unstable as Terry's mother. Steel promptly wonders if Terry crafts washtubs, flipping the situation around.




From what I can tell, Missile Bomb is playing a game of baseball and using Elfs as the balls.




Okay, "Steel Mankind" is a pretty awesome name, even if the guy forgets whether or not he's a master basin craftsman or not regularly.



Steel promptly falls down the well. He's brode his waist in the process, so it's up to Terry to save the Yedong from Missile Bomb.



He compliments Terry though, saying he has a Soul of Coach. Terry takes some solace in the mangled compliment, wondering if he can perhaps redeem himself after abandoning his mother.



Timmy fell down in the well!? He just wanted to play, we have to save him!



Torgo and Cfour make short work of Timmy, who throws a childish temper tantrum immediately.



We, Missile Bomb, will knock you all down!



After defeating her, we get absolutely nothing from the Bal behind her.



Terry's Elfs are starting to take after their Coach.



This Missile Bomb member may have some concern for the sickly, or he might be taking pleasure from their suffering. He's just noting "people get sick", so who knows?



The Yedong clouds Terry's mind with doubt. But no, he's already left home. Shame fills him, but not regret.




Okay, I'll be honest, this line made me laugh far harder than anything else we've seen so far. Terry is not bothered by the idea of someone threatening him with improper manners.



The local ringleader of Missile Bomb chooses to yell gibberish at Terry anyway upon defeat.



Cliches transcend language barriers, even multiple barriers applied at the same time like a nightmarish patchwork.




Missile Bomb is kind of like a bunch of cicada larva, staying under the ground for several years before emerging.



And they're about as hard to pin down. Terry now has a group of enemies! He's maturing as an antihero protagonist.



Steel Mankind, also known as Gangtie.



Terry knows how to do amazing things with rope, as Yusiji's Aide can tell you. Steel correctly calls him a fiend for it.



Is that supposed to be like millet? Steel has an odd taste in grains.




Terry can head to the Gymnasium, and the local helper NPC is quick to offer his helpful advice.



The first enemy here at the Gymnasium is a pair of very smelly little girls.



They aren't anything to write home about, but Walnut acknowledges the strength of our team. Mostly it's just Torgo using Bind to defeat everything in one hit.



Later trainers have even tougher elfs though, Fork here takes two Binds to take down. Terry's skills as a coach aren't exactly being put to the test.



Zhsozhi is the local head coach of the Gymnasium, and he's an expert in worm elfs.




His first two worm elfs, Delan and Keyu, each are no match for Torgo's mighty Bind.



Zenda, however, has the Knif attack, which starts out weak, then gets stronger with consecutive uses. This would be dangerous if Bind didn't get rid of the Zenda in two hits.



Zhsozhi is giving us a budge! We're already a quarter the way to having all eight!



Badges/Budges are a more solemn affair than regular items, so Terry doesn't swear about having to find space to put it.



We also gain the ability to use the Saw stunt outside of battle thanks to the Nsect badge.



As we attempt to leave the town and proceed on Terry's journey to find a purpose in his empty life, Porno arrives and interrupts things. Questioning if we really repelled Missile Bomb, he decides to see if we're really a good enough Coach to have done so!



Porno's Alige has the dangerous Flame attack, which functions like some sort of water gun. This is a bad thing, because Torgo and Cfour are weak to that sort of attack.



Pocket Monsters? What are those?



Terry hits a mild overdose, and passes out in a haze.



Time to grasp something that can withstand that deadly Flame attack.



Yed(ong) here is so dimwitted that it isn't aware of being captured.



It's going to be the workhorse for many of the Stunts in the game, so I give it a name symbolic of its status.



While doing a bit of training to overcome that Alige, Torgo learns Hypnosi. It's a very quick attack, always striking first, but otherwise not very notable. I get rid of S-pin for it.




Porno is outraged that we've defeated him! Terry isn't a trashy man!



Porno would much rather jog.