Part 13: Shave the brow, stay at home idly.

Dr. Wusiji calls Terry back to the lab after all 8 badges have been obtained.



There's a road south from the city that leads all the way back to Terry's home, so it'll be a short walk. The usual weirdness greets Terry along the way, meeting a burly man who advocates shaving eyebrows and being a shut-in.




Sexual deviants are along the road as well, but Terry's used to that by now.



Arriving home with little fanfare, Terry is at first ashamed to return to the mother he abandoned. However, to his infinite sorrow, she never noticed he was gone, instead gazing into the oven blankly the entire time.



Dr. Wusiji awards Terry with a Mainbal for his efforts thus far. It goes into the infinite pile.



Terry vomits into the water before heading east towards the pinnacle of everything so far.



This is Terry's first step into the country of Guandong! Finally, a name for the location!



And at long last, a signpost tells Terry what the name of the Country he's been living and adventuring in is called. Shanddao. This cave marks the official border.



Terry celebrates by defying gravity and drifting up a waterfall, dragging his team along with him.



The road to the Elf League is packed full of coaches, all stocked with strong Elf teams themselves. Fortunately, this guy and Terry manage to bond over a mutual love of inhalants. Ah, nothing like an empty can of shaving cream's propellant!



The two new friends begin discussing the works of Shakespeare and their impact on modern storytelling.



Further along, another coach praises Terry for his modesty, of all things. Well, Terry isn't arrogant, at least? That's a virtue, although how relevant it is is questionable.



Finally, Terry comes to a small, humble gatehouse. His badges are checked, and he is allowed to pass.



There's a branch in the road here though. Terry can only proceed straight for now, but to the left, Baijinshan waits. Whatever that is.



Ah, something new to hear about, in this game at least. The "Four Emperors" are waiting for Terry ahead! What an original name for a unique group of four people.



Gj Road beckons, the last challenge for any coach who has made it this far!



It's pretty underwhelming and short, actually. The only thing of note through the whole thing is a Cho Drug Terry gets his grubby mitts on.



And the translation trainwreck all comes full circle! How are you gentlemen?



Porno is so shocked by yet another loss that he starts slobbering his words together in a mouthful of spit.




Porno decides that if he can't defeat Terry, he will become Terry. That sounds moderately disturbing, par for Porno's course. Although it remains to be seen if Porno can actually survive the drug intake Terry has without a fatal overdose. Terry's body is acclimated to that stuff, Porno's isn't.



That's a good enough name for this place as any. Welcome to Zenith. Which is actually kind of a cool name, I have to admit.



Without further ado, it's time to take on the Four Emperors. Terry doesn't even bother resting after Gj Road!



The first is Yisiji, who claims to have circumnavigated the globe on foot.



Lose out absolutely?



Sounds like a fantastic idea! Nobody is here for the thrilling battles anyway, people want to read about Terry's epic odyssey through the insane world he lives in instead.



Upon defeat, Yisiji warns Terry that the other Emperors are much stronger than he is.

Also, for the record, what I wanted to do for this segment was put in a cheat code so that every battle was treated like the "How to Catch a Pokemon" tutorial provided at the beginning of the game, ending them all instantly. Sadly, I could only find a code that did that for the US ROM, and this game is based on the Japanese one.



The next of the Emperors is a suicidal hypnotist who Terry caught in the act of downing a tall glass of rat poison.



Fortunately, Terry saves his life by providing a copy of "Terry!Greasy Bag Cook", a compendium of recipes. The Emperor is immediately hooked on the baking craze, and thanks Terry by challenging him to the battle that will allow him to progress through Zenith.



Guano simply watches as the Emperor's team develops narcolepsy, fainting the instant they're called to battle thanks to Terry's knowledge of dark magic.



The Emperor deems Terry the Master and allows him to pass to the next house. Evidently, Zenith is composed of a multitude of homes built on top of one other that connect in bizarre ways.



The next Emperor introduces himself as Siba, and much like What's-Her-Name the last curator, has stocked his living space full of boiling lava.



The burly man compliments Terry on his looks. Something Terry is unfortunately used to by this point. Everyone wants a piece of Terry.



After trouncing him, Siba reveals that he isn't allowed to speak to people who've beaten him.




Jialun sees Terry run. See Terry run. Run Terry run.



Jialun is the most depraved of all coaches, establishing her love of "evil monsters" immediately. Who knows what horrifying things this woman does in her spare time.



Yes, yes it is. Even Terry is creeped out by Jialun.




The champion is waiting Terry.



He even says so himself. I don't know why, but I find that small exchange funny.





Rather than an Elf Battle, Terry is challenged by Du to a wrestling contest. While they do that, their Elf teams duke it out to pass the time. Have a video of the climactic showdown!



During this epic battle, Cfour learns to forget her Hate. She still has Anger, mind you, but it's a step forwards!



Terry's team wins, and he threatens to let Cfour loose on Du if he doesn't just accept Terry as the new champion. So ends their wrestling competition.