The Let's Play Archive

Princess Maker 2

by SynthOrange

Part 21: Show's over everyone. Go home!

19. That's it?

Well, you're eighteen in a few months. Then you're outta here! Any plans on what you're going to do with yourself, besides whoring your ass out to anyone throwing money at you?
Well I don't see you denying it.
Hmm, well, I did think of something... but I don't know if I'm quite smart enough to pull it off... I just can't work out some of the fine details.
Not smart enough, eh? Well that we can fix.

To the laboratory!

I still don't see how you can say all this when we brought you the smoking corpse of a dead God.
It's a well known fact that baleen shark carcasses can rot in a way that cause them to resemble a dead god to the untrained layman.
You have no idea how hard it is for me to resist killing you with my mind powers right now...

Check out the big brain on Lizzie!

Hey Lizzie, what do your newly aquired smarts tell you?
That... it's cold outside?
Hence you should...?
...put on a scarf and coat?

Goddamn you're smart.


Hey, I'm here to pick up my... Why isn't she in class?
Well, Lizzie's advancing so quickly that she's attending classes purely through telepathic projection now.


On the other hand, do you really want him putting his weiner in you?
Good point.


January 1218

Cube, did you remember to take a picture of the calendar this month?
W-why would I take a picture of that?

After school, Lizzie bumps into a suicidal person on the street...

Ahahahahaa, oh wait... you're serious?

T-0.93 seconds

T-0.15 seconds

T-0.03 seconds

T+1.03 seconds


Lizzie passes some time pleasantly with the young officer...

This turns out to be a complete lie.


Ooooh, I like that. Upbeat, yet with a sinister undercurrent?

Is it just me, or were we not able to see her brain through her skull yesterday?
I don't remember, but if it doesn't stop throbbing like that, I'm going to throw up.


Influence over Palace occupants now within acceptable levels...


Continue with data acquisition.

Operational status: Sub-optimal, but entirely within mission parameters.


Sufficient data accumulated, begin compiling.


April 23, 1218

Compiling interrupted: Cake and teacup present!

I got you something too, Papa!
Socks. Not even Santa gave me socks.
You know he's not real, right?

It is?
Well it says so right there.
He's right!


Why you!
I worked quite a bit. The old man down at the bar was very good to me. (I think, that time's a bit fuzzy for some reason) It was hard, working from the time when I was just a child, but it's thanks to that I got good at waitressing in the bar.

On my way, President Sarcastro!

Ah! Welcome, Lizzie! You've certanly grown into a fine young woman. You were just a little child when you came to live with Shinkicker.
Sire, you seem to be in quite a good mood today.
I am. It is because I have before me the daughter of the hero Shinkicker, who has grown up to be a fine young woman indeed.
My father praises you just as highly.
That's a lie!
Shush, Dad, I'm trying to make you look good.
Oh, right!
We have called you here today for a reason. Your reputation as a magic user has reached even his Majesty's ears. I am proposing that you be made the court magician
Me? Court Magician?
As you know, court magician is the highest position in the kingdom for a magic user. He or she reports directly to the King.
I don't know... Am I really fit for such an important responsibility?
There is no one as fit as you are. I would be glad to have you. You are such an outstanding sorceress... Well, will you accept our offer?
Yes. Thank you very much. This is a great honor. I will work as hard as I can.

At last... Package is in position. Initiate protocol: REGICIDE.
Holy balls!


Alright Liz, fun's fun, but it's time to go home. Even if he is the butler, Cube can't do all the work himself.
Uhm, sir, she is Queen of the realm... even if it is through a bloody coup.
Please don't insult us both like that. We both know that the only thing he's been butlering all these years is your ass.
The jig is up!
Don't worry, I made it gay marriage legal yesterday so I could force those two to pair off.
We're so happy...
However, since you're both married to people who're technically non-human, you're still all going to jail and/or the zoo for crimes against nature.
WHY YOU... oh, a-ha-haaa!
Hahahaaaa! Oh, the look on your faces!
I promise I'll get you someday lil' girl!


Lizzie, you have grown up to be beautiful indeed, just as I thought you would. I have come tonight to take you away with me.
Lucifon, Prince of Darkness.

You are a child of Heaven. However, you have been sinful, your revenence for Heaven has waned, and you have gained a seductive charm. You certainly could not be happy in Heaven, and I doubt that you could be happy here in the world of mortals.
I, Lucifon, Prince of Darnkess, King of the Underworld, am the only man who can make you happy. Come with me. You will have vast wealth, and all my armies of demons at your disposal. You will bask in magnificent luxuries...
...yes. Yes, I'll marry you.

True, but who were the geniuses who left her with a drunken swordsman who's only qualifications lie in Prince-of-Darkness-smiting?
Uh, we'll get back to you on that...

MY sins? What does that have to do with...
Will you two shut up? The story's not done yet!
Oh, sorry.

Meanwhile, in a certain bedroom in Hell...

Woah, WOAH, OW! Jeezus Keerhist! I'm not into any of that kinky shit, woman!

You know, I'd be a little more surprised by this betrayal if you weren't the kind of girl who'd marry Satan himself, a.k.a. me!

Of course, but let's hear it one more time so the audience can hear it...

That's right, they made Cube watch.

Isn't she perfect for ruling a land of demons?
D-don't say such...
Now I can die with an untroubled mind... So long, Cube, young nobleman of the underworld...

The Prince of Darkness is sovereign lord of the nether regions, and is also known as king (or queen) of the Underworld. In order to control the demons in Hell, the Lord, king of the Gods, binds its most powerful denizen to rule over it for him. Heaven is the land of order. The Underworld is the land of chaos. And the land of mortals, the World, mixes both. These three lands make up all of Creation, and the duty of the ruler of Hell is to govern the raging demons of the underworld, and to punish humans who are easily corrupted.

There she will live forever, ruling over the demons in hell... If the humans manage to build a better world, then it is likely that no one will ever see Lizzie again. However, if the capital ever again falls into depravity and the indulgence of pleasure, then this time they will have to face the wrath of Lizzie, Princess of Darkness.

Except of course, now I control two-thirds of all of creation. I can live with that.
That still leaves Heaven, which shall be forever out of your grasp, Lizzie.
What, that tiny place? Standing room only? You can keep it.

She's got a point, boss.
Ah, who asked you?

Okay, now are we done?
I guess so. Don't forget to turn off the lights.

There he secretly spied on a banquet
presided over by the ruler of the Underworld.
It appeared that the demons were ruled
not by a Prince, but by a Princess of Darkness,
in the form of a young girl...

Lizzie, LIZZIE! What the hell are you wearing, young lady? We've been worried sick about you! Get your ass home right this instant!
Coming, Papa!