The Let's Play Archive

Riviera: The Promised Land

by Didja Redo

Part 41: Hector's rap lyrics

i am hector is a great rap artists

Enjoy my laughable attempts to sound like a African American fresh from the ghetto! (Although Hector should sound like a white guy trying to be black anyway, so I suppose that works.)

Here are the lyrics, for those who have as much trouble deciphering rap as I do. Especially through an old, ten dollar mic.


Uh, yeah
Hector in the house,
Comin at ya from Asgard, representin the Magi,
This one's for my brothers in the hood...s.
Check it out.


There ain't no stoppin my apocalyptic machinations,
Demons risin' up to overthrow the nation,
Ragnarok approaches and there's only one solution,
It's a little thing I like to call the Retribution.

M to the A to the G to the I,
With the knowledge of the Magi, you better comply with my,
Master plan, it began when
Motherfuckers from Utgard try to act like they He-man.

These bitches be poachin', straight encroachin' on my turf,
But little do they know I'm bout to show them what I'm worth,
Me and my angels, they be of the grim persuasion,
We gonna put an end to this troublesome invasion.

My man Ledah, named his piece Lorelei,
Straight badass gonna make a fuckin' shish kebab,
But damn, that Ein, nigga know how to whine,
Don't you know we gotta meet a motherfuckin' deadline?

He be bitchin' at me, "How come all these Sprites gotta die?"
Just follow my command, homie! You don't need to know why.
And while we at it, quit makin' eyes at Ursula,
And ain't no rhymes for Ursula so imma just say "spatula".

This ho's detractin', straight overreactin',
So distractin', I gotta work on subtractin' her
From my equation, I'm sick of this abrasion,
If this keeps up I'll end up rappin' like a caucasian.



See, this is why I gotta get rid of her.

Goddamn cocksuckin' bitch.

Tell the lands, raise your hands for Hector,
The biggest villain since Hannibal Lecter,
Feel my wrath, bloodbath, I'm on the warpath,
Riviera's fucked, brother, just do the math.

One of seven, protecting the heavens,
The time has come for me to crank this shit up to eleven,
Build up my Rage Gauge and unleash the Break Out,
Imma prove that I'm the best beyond a shadow of a doubt.

There ain't no stoppin' my apocalyptic machinations,
Motherfuckin' demons risin' up to overrun our nation,
I am the doctor and I have the solution,
I prescribe a hundred ccs of Retribution.

Passin' judgement in the name of the gods,
Standin' firm, gonna triumph, don't give a shit about the odds,
Never bend, never break, never shed a tear,
Cruisin' 'cross the realms, spreading chaos and fear.

I sent my girl Malice to destroy the Arcs,
Ripped them apart faster than a pack of fuckin' sharks,
I swear to Christ that this chick be fucked in the head,
(But, uh, don't tell her I said that, or she probably try to make me dead.)

Now just because I got these tools and jewels,
Subservient fools, and other words that end with "ools",
That doesn't mean I'm soft, I know you din't just scoff,
You bitches best depart before you really piss me off.

You fuck with Hector you'll be leavin' in a hearse,
Once I tear your ass up with my Ether Burst,
Who the hell you think you are, man? You tryin' to diss?
Throw the fuck down, honky, let me see you S-rank this!


Who kills a squirrel anyway, man?

That shit's fucked up, yo.