Part 27: 26. "This is likely to keep just about anybody away."
26. "This is likely to keep just about anybody away."
Sigh. So yeah, meet our first enemy. Panda Snatchers. They're not so different from Naked Snatchers or the Snatcher bosses we've faced. Go for the face!
They consistently hit for about half your max health, so you'll want to keep your HP up at all times.
They dole out good experience, although this is probably around the time where you're vastly over-levelled and don't care.
Hey, a clown!
...Please tell me there's no Snatcher-Clown. I don't think I could take it.
Don't worry - there isn't.
Oh shit I lied here's one!
The two enemies in Syd Garden are Panda and Clown Snatcehrs. They behave exactly the same, only with different outfits.
Also killing them makes their hats shatter. I dunno.
And they give out more XP than their Panda cohorts for some reason. Not sure why.
So, yeah, that's the grand tour. Pandas and Clowns.
As if this game wasn't giving you enough of the middle finger, the final floor is one of those mazes where you have to wind up and down different flights of stairs.
This green floor is the last mirror floor down. Get through a couple more pandas to lead to...
This grand ole' staircse!
Hmmm... a loading dock of some sort? I dunno. This one part of the last dungeon is different than all the others. Okay. All I know is there's new enemies.
Scrubbin' Hubbles! You know what? Who fucking cares about him?
And look who else it is!
Freudroid! Now get the fuck out of here. It's a dick and balls, and I don't think I'm reading too much into things. You might as well just throw Goatsebot into the mix at this point. No, wait, don't!
There's only one thing of note about our phallic pal, Freudroid...
He can paralyze you. Fortunately, you've probably not used too much of your Jyro, so Metal's got your back.
Long story short.
Fortunately we get to explore more dungeon! Yay for us. ...
Oh, fuck you! This place has a whole 'nother floor?! Jesus! It's like "Pain in the ass" in convenient video game form.
And lest you forget...
Our good friend Clownbot is still here.
There's a very special panda over there, too... are we ready to do battle with-
NO. FUCK YOU.
NO! FUCK YOU! NO!
KOJIMA!!! I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!!!
We're going through this part as fast as possible and never looking back.
Hey look Randam's dressed normal! Everything's okay! Daddy's sober! Happy family!
I can't tell if that's an insult or self-deprecation. Damn you, OASIS!
Gilian: (At least I won't be caught at Furrcon.)
Gilian: Oh, nothing.
What?! When did Gilian turn all pussy on us? Get a grip, Seed!
And with that, Randam heads into the real final dungeon.
As do we.
The final dungeon. It's pretty effing expansive, unfortunately and as far as enemies go, it's got easily the largest variety and volume of killer robots. Buckle in for the long haul.
Oh, what's that, you say? You weren't aware this was the last dungeon and didn't stock up? Tough shit - you've got to renavigate the mirror maze to get back. And there's no Joy Division. Sure, there's one in the sewer, but putting one here would just be unrealistic.
Gilian: Those robots can't go through the door, Metal. Let's just avoid them to the left.
Meet Doroideka (hey, it's Japanese, okay)! This guy is sort of immune to C. Killer - it'll only work for 2 turns and since there's a FUCKTON of enemies in the base, just save them for later. They're able to paralyze like Freudroid, but they're also extra easy to blind.
That's not too bad, see? There's another type of robot to worry about, though.
Nozaku throws nets and has pretty high stats. The C. Killer works fine on him, though, so feel free to make short work of him.
Like so. Incidentally, in my notes, I called him "Gold Shoulders." I don't know why I just told you that.
This part of the Snatcher base is all boxes. See those ones directly below Gilian and the gold robot? Those are important.
Metal: Gilian, those boxes could be important!
Gilian: I'll check 'em out later.
Actually those boxes are all over the fortress.
From a gameplay standpoint, this is how the game compensates for not having a good resupply point anywhere nearby. They just give you shitloads of items. Not C. Killer, annoyingly, but tons of health and ammo.
They're shipped from Siberia. (I'm extrapolating this.) The Snatchers in Siberia are shipping this stuff to Neo Kobe. How do I know? Because that's how Snatchers were transported there in the original. Also, some of these contain:
Box Snatchers can't move or dodge, making them less of a pain in the ass than any other enemy in the damn game.
Unfortunately, the M. Maxim's rectangular shape has the wrong dimensions for this. Oh well.
The base also contains these long enemy-free tracks for God knows what reason. Maybe they were meant to be conveyor belts? I don't know.
This is what happens if you get paralyzed and you're out of Jyro. Gilian snores. "Paralysis," huh.
See? Look how many openable boxes the game gives you! It's ridiculous. What's even more ridiculous is that I had 40 Junkers Rush at the start of this section (after seeing Random) and I later maxed out to 99 without a store - the game just gives you that fucking many!
This is your objective - the exit in the upper right corner. It leads, predictably, to...
A bunch of scientists. (Sigh.) If you say so.
We're apparently the first human they've seen in awhile.
Oh, sorry, I'll just fucking leave then.
...Is anyone gonna explain what's going on or anything? Who these people are? No?
What is anyone talking about?
Oh, please don't make me solve some dumbass color puzzle. Please?
This is a new part of the SD Snatcher plot: Lucipher Beta. We'll learn more later.
Well, if Lucipher Alpha killed only 50% of the world's population, what could Beta do?! I have no idea!
In original Snatcher, L-Angels was actually the vaccine for Lucipher Alpha.
...Good to know. (Unfortunately, it is.) Head south to find...
A submarine port?