Part 69: Episode LXIV: A Monster PunchEpisode LXIV: A Monster Punch
CLICK HERE FOR VIDEO! (Hey, the reason I put the video thing at the end is usually I would like you to read the thing I took the last 2-3 hours writing before the cliff notes version. But this you definitely need to see!)
NEW Music: Evil Gate Opener I (This only ever plays here.)
Ugh... Lord Rasputin... uhh...
By the way... That Night Queen fight with transformed Veronica Vera? Unlike a certain earlier Sapientes Gladio jobber who turned into a weird rockman guy with a pincer arm then turned back to normal and fell through a hole in the wall thus he didn't have a confirmed corpse, this was a real match there. Veronica Vera is FUCKING DEAD! Like full stop. We killed her. Oh, you thought she was going to have more history with Lucia or something? That's cute you think Lucia gets development. Sorry to break it but Lucia is this game's Lulu FFX in which she drove the plot for a hot minute and... is just kind of here now... Fucking Gepetto at least gets a taste of pathos late game. Lucia? Naw...
Anyway, Rasputin is ready to go, bro!
...Do a suicide...
Psyche! Fuck your physics or logistics! That Rasputin doom airship that is at the very least roughly in the ballpark of 800 feet top to bottom was secretly parked just below the Winter Palace, a structure which is three stories tall and thus maybe 40-50 feet total including roof ornaments and foundation. Also, I guess the guy can wall-jump given his trajectory to make it a good 30-40 feet away and be all smug about escaping to safety.
Nobody knows what to make of Rasputin's grand back-up plan of... just flying this airship across the river, I guess... I mean, that's literally what he said last time. He's going to a stronghold across the river. It'll probably take him more time to disembark from this airship to the ground than this whole posturing fiasco occurring.
Has other plans...
NEW Music: Evil Gate Opener II (This also only ever plays here.)
And thus did the Yuri Punch Instinct grow three times that day...
Yuri-Amon is not playing about. It is go time! We didn't kill a weird Turkish sage for no reason to get to this point.
The Sapientes Gladio airship AA guns (who are manning them at this point, we already killed all of Lenny's jobbers shock troopers that seemed to be the core of the organization's base personnel) try their best against Amon-Yuri.
They were not prepared for Yuri just clotheslining their entire offensive. To be honest, nobody was ready for that.
Rasputin gets mildly concerned about the fact half of his airship's defensive capabilities just exploded. That's probably the most on the ball he's been in a while.
However, what is going on behind him is likely much more relevant. Namely...
Devilman Yuri Hyuga and a curled fist.
Amon?! But how?! The Mistletoe...?
Oh, shit, dawg! Did leaving your end game plans in the hand of unvetted subordinates come to bite you in the ass again? It's like you should maybe personally oversee a plan or two instead of outsourcing shit to hired hands that perhaps aren't entirely on the level. Granted, on the other hand, if you think about it... There is zero reason Yuri would have gotten involved with any of this adventure if not for Rasputin's mob starting shit. Like, I don't see a decent reason he would have stopped being depressed and drinking with Gepetto other than the occasional fucking up the German Army back in Domremy if he had not gotten cursed by Sapientes Gladio. Why would Yuri care about an underhanded but publically legit coup in Russia by Rasputin? The guy is The Godslayer not the Regional Politically Nebulous Usurper Slayer. There is so much of your planning that is just sitting on your own balls, Grigori.
We have not actually seen the extent of Sith Lord Rasputin's offensive capabilities. Sure, he has an AOE attack that can knock out every soldier and all present nobles high as a kite for about a city block radius. And possess people. And his defensive magic is OP. But how about his Magic Missile prowess?
<runs forward> Yuri!!
Yeah, Yuri-Amon just cracks his neck and flexes his shoulder and no-sells that bullshit.
Amon-Yuri clenches his fist. You know what time it is? It's time to fucking PUNCH GRIGORI RASPUTIN!!
NEW Music: Evil Gate Opener III (You guessed it. This only plays here.)
YEAH YEAH YEAH!!!
OK... Rasputin does still have that invincible Asmodeus shield business. But Yuri... What if... What if...
What if you punched harder... NO! Not like that...
NO YURI HYUGA!! HAAAAAAARDER!! PUNCH!! GIMME THAT HOT BLOODED SHONEN ANIME SHIT, MY DUDE!!
YEAH YEAH YEAH!! That's the stuff!! Bleed tears you're punching so hard!!
You were not prepared for how fucking hard Yuri Hyuga finally punched Grigori Rasputin.
Rasputin just got punched so hard by our Rude Hero it blew up an entire airship. That was an AOE punch that uppercut a fucking ZEPPLIN out of the goddamn sky! That is the hypest shit it's been in any JRPG I've done an LP of in quite some time! Fuck yeah!
Awroo! (Holy shit!)
Don't worry about Yuri, Karin. He too is hype as shit about how hard he just wrecked Rasputin's day.
Meanwhile, Nicolai is happy he took that bathroom break and didn't follow-up on helping out Veronica in defending Rasputin and watches his encroaching unemployment from Sapientes Gladio from afar. Also, this is apparently the same bridge Rasputin dies on in that bizarre Don Bluth Anastasia movie. Take that as you will...
Music: Evil Gate Opener I (I lied, it last plays here actually. )
Rasputin survived that. Also he can fly, by the way. But he is... not doing great after that WMD punch from Yuri-Amon.
Argh... My shield... So much power... I suppose... I have no other choice?!
I am not owned... I am NOT owned... SHIT!!
Yo, Rasputin. Your boy Yuri is still here and he has another fist that hasn't done a punch yet...
Amon! I have something to show you! The demon that dwells within meeeee!
<flying off> AHAHAHAHAHA!!
My lord and benefactor, Asmodeus! It is time to fulfill the Soul Pact!! Come to this world and take this place as your holy land!!
Yuri, somewhat slow on the uptake here, begins flying over to stop Rasputin since... this sounds like a bad scene... Rasputin has earned the power of two exclamation points recently...
In the name of the Sword Sages!!
I summon you to this plaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace!!
This... doesn't seem great. You may have dropped the ball here, Yuri...
To be frank, the fact you just stop and jitter in place as this goes down does not inspire confidence.
<assorted grunts and screams>
Everyone is disoriented by whatever the hell Rasputin just did to complete a Soul Pact with a dark god. But Karin is the first to get it together and witnesses...
OLD Music: ICARO - Song of Spirits
<wide eyed> Huh...?
Behold the final penultimate actually dungeon of Shadow Hearts: Covenant, Disc 1 -- Idar Flamme! Did you know Saint Petersburg had Neamto Float ~ East beneath it this whole time? Welp. Your education on ancient alien artifacts in Russia has begun. Your final reminder that Rasputin fucking up an assassination attempt on the Emperor of Russia by pivoting to bombing the capital city with an airship, unleashing a horde of demons, turning his girlfriend into a titty demon, and having a shonen anime fistfight with someone fused with another dark god before summoning an ancient alien Doom Fortress all occurred within the same hour...
Shadow Hearts: Covenant!
Video: Episode 64 Movie (100% watch this.)
Rasputin Concept Art - I am Grigori Rasputin, and I'm here to ask you a question. Is a man not entitled to his Emperorship of Russia? 'No!' says the man in Washington, 'It belongs to the Romanovs and it's not our business, maybe we will tag in later in the sequel.' 'No!' says the man in the Vatican, 'It belongs to God.' 'No!' says the man in Moscow, 'It belongs to the Romanovs again.' I rejected those answers; instead, I chose something different. I chose the impossible. I chose... to flip my shit and do all the bullshit...