The Let's Play Archive

Star Wars: Rebellion

by Pander

Part 10: Days 143-154: Space Battle and Sabotage.


DAY 143

A key turning point in every dictator's rise to power is the giving of uselessly grandiose military titles to loyal toadies. I was intending on saving the best for myself (Unassailable Chancellor of Asskickery is too far sweet to bestow upon ANYONE else in this ramshackle rebellion), but that still leaves a lot of good titles to give out to even the most undeserving of wretches.

*knock* *knock* *thud*

: Why, some delivery-person has left this package unannounced at my door! Perhaps my glorious strategist wishes to find glee in an exploding box full of nails, or a belt of thermal detonators loaded with pepper spray, or...shoulderboards and stars?

: *shine*

: I knew it! I knew he believed in me! I thought he'd be upset after I murdered an old man who probably had information, but here it is, validation in four stars! Look out world, here comes ADMIRAL VIRGILIO, ready to save the day!

DAY 145

What's that Lassie? You found droids about to spy on me? But we can't do anything about it? You want me to throw you into the well?

They arrive tomorrow? But my planet's a mess, whatever will they think of me?

That's right. Just sit tight. Don't take any initiative and kill those droids you know are coming, please. Just take it easy.

DAY 146


As it turns out, Medium Transports can actually kill TIEs okay. Everything can, really. Otherwise this is the X-wing/Y-wing show.


Everyone ran, no casualties. Get used to this result until you get interdictors/CC-7700's.

I knew I made that psychotic killer an admiral for a good reason! With that bloodless retreat we've scored a huge PR victory here. While tactically insignificant, this is the first step we've taken to prove we can hold our on in space, same as we have in the diplomatic circles.

Now all that's left is to actually hurt an enemy ship...that should only take another third of a year.

I wiped the sweat off my face after that intense non-battle, and turned my attention to the engineers of the nearby clackers system.

We are one step closer to wookiees. This feels like Christmas Eve. The waiting is killing me.

Why does Troop Training have powerpoints up about the Death Star Trench mission?

And looking to the world of espionage...

So he's scheduled to be there, so that's why he's still in hyperspace. I will tear off fake-threepio's head and piss battery acid into his vocabulator.

DAY 152

We could always use more charges to blow up that threepio units!

DAY 153

One down! These guys are hardcore.

DAY 154

Two d...wait, it failed? Oh, perfect. They spied on us.

A busy fortnight. I have been victorious in all that I strove to accomplish. And yet...

I'm at an impasse in my plans for world-redomination. Do I build up refineries and mines, to ensure unhindered growth later? Or do I build up my starbases now, without facility research yielding Adv. Orbital Shipyards, and suck up the delays in raw materials?

And where do I build this crap? Screw plucky rebels with good hearts, I want a fucking ruthless civil engineer who can get shit done. Done right, and done now.

Oh, and Sarin's back on latrine duty until he rediscovers his taste for blood. My agents are reporting he's actually REMORSEFUL about what he did. I don't know what deity I pissed off to get put on this side. Take some pride in your work, man! My favorite sniper once took out a guy's optic nerves from eighty yards with a Druganov, and proceeded to play golf with the poor bastard's newly detached eyeballs as he writhed on the ground screaming and crying blood. I need more of that kind of chutzpah in this rebellion.