The Let's Play Archive

The Chzo Mythos

by Quovak

Part 43: Challenge 3 Results

Contest Results

In first place, getting 3 points, is 21st Century:

21st Century posted:

Well, it's quite obvious. The Prince is a servant of pain and John DeFoe's entire life is nothing but pain. The reason why they live together is obvious. What's interesting is the reason why they live in a piece of wood. You see, John DeFoe was a deformed, retarded child who was literally beaten to death. The Prince was a tall, androgynous white humanoid. They could easily have rented a flat and teamed up to fight crime after adopting a fast-talking American rapping dog. The only problem is, in 17th Century England, it was still illegal for Paranormal anthropomorphisations to marry with deformed manchildren, much less for either of them to actually own property. This is exacerbated by their own murderous qualities. So it was thought that maybe they could justl ive in the Defoe Manor. They even had started to think about redecorating, changing the drapes, adding a few decapitated heads around. you know, making it a bit more homely. Again, sadly, they had some trouble finding a good interior decorator, much less one whose blood would match the upholstery. That's why John decided to do some of the renovations himself. He started with the bathroom while he had the Tall man (who, being a messenger of pain, was well acquainted with bureaucracy and paperwork) get the Last will and Testament of Sir Roderick DeFoe notarized properly. You see, while John DeFoe was technically an unholy ghoul, he was still the only next of kin and, therefore, could get ownership of the place through a loophole in British law. Tragically, the Tall Man succumbed to his nature while in town and went on a killing spree. With no way to notarize the will, it was impossible for them to stat in the house. Rather than face eviction, they decided to do the logical thing: Haunting the place for centuries while keeping DeFoe's body under the bathroom tiles (that were recently installed). By haunting the house, they could still live in it until British law could be amended and allow rights to paranormal entities. After a couple years of dormancy under the bathroom floor, he started to get lonely and moved in with the Prince. They had a lot in common already so they got along fine until Trillby came, really.

The really tragic thing is, they never did get their flat and crimefighting series. Damn criminals like Trillby ruin everything.

In second place, getting 2 points, is Killer Emcee's relatively tame retelling of The Aristocrats.

Killer Emcee posted:

Like all retards, John DeFoe was fascinated by bizarre proportions. When his soul had entered the wooden idol and had stood face to face with the Thin Man, he became stiff (more startled and less erectile related). The Thin Man had extremely bizarre proportions.

He had the physique of a withering fern, the posture of an ironing board, and the face of--well, he had no face. That was equally bizarre. DeFoe wondered if he could twist his body into a pretzel. He had been fond of pretzels as a child since it was a main part of his diet.

John DeFoe caught the Thin Man's attention as well (in a non-homoerotic way). The Thin Man had never seen a retard before and assumed, by the way he was dressed and his choice of accessory, that he was a malformed spaceman that was an explorer of lush jungles. Like Indiana Jones but retarded.

And then, as if forced into their minds by a lousy writer trying to make this ridiculous story come together, they had an idea. They would take their unique styles and create a vaudeville act, which was very difficult since DeFoe could not speak and the Thin Man had no mouth. The act itself was way too complicated to describe but believe me, it was awesome. It would be called The Prince and the Retard Explorer from Space. They played on showboats up and down the Mississippi river. They became stars!

They also murdered a lot of people but that was more of a side thing.

Finally, in third place and getting 1 point, Scale Model Giant's English thesis.

Scale Model Giant posted:

It's all an allegory for Yahtzee's tormented psyche. See, the wood represents Yahtzee's creative spirit, his desire to produce something useful and enjoyable for the world--for example, an adventure game. But the wood is continually rejected by its finders, picked apart piece by piece and used for their own devices. The Tall Man then embodies Yahtzee's untapped rage and indignation towards all who soil and scoff at his work. Through the Tall Man he can seek retribution against those who would tear apart his work. But the cycle wouldn't end; all of Yahtzee's sense of meaning and worth was just reduced to a laughable piece of wood.

Until John DeFoe. If the Tall Man is Yahtzee as game-maker, DeFoe is Yahtzee as gamer. Isolated from all human contact, suffering the same dreary repetitive existence day in and day out, the occasional painful, unwarranted thrashing his only break from the monotony. The Tall Man saw the potential in this battered soul. Here was someone with a sense of true anguish who could attack the world in the same way the world attacked his precious wood. So the Tall Man took DeFoe into the wood, and bestowed upon him all its creative powers (via Zero Punctuation), giving him the chance to lash out at the world that had spurned them both. Now both aspects of Yahtzee's diseased mind are satisfied as DeFoe eviscerates all those who would dare cross his path.

Honorable mentions to almost everyone, but especially DalaranJ and people who continue to talk about space, which I still haven't stopped finding funny.

Challenge 4: Concept Art
Trilby's Notes ended up taking the series in some new directions, but it could have been another rehashed sequel of John DeFoe in exotic location #792. By Sunday evening, draw some concept art for a different way Yahtzee could have handled the third installment.

Humor and ideas are much more important than drawing ability, and you can photoshop it or otherwise not directly draw it if you want. Also, Doomfunk is allowed to enter his 8 Days a Cephalopod image and probably win with it.