The Let's Play Archive

UFO: Aftermath

by Jade Star

Part 14: Twig and Berries

Update 12: Twig and Berries

"February eleventh, Nordvik region update.

Most of the squad is resting in the base right now after the mission. There isn't a lot to report aside from the latest blow we have dealt the aliens. I will cover that in full in just a minute. There is only a little research completed recently, and even then it is only confirmation on what we know.

I don't think these guys have checked with Haggis after handing him the guns. He claims he is running a zoo for the things. At least they haven't caused any damage to the base. That is about all there is to report on during the last couple of days. So included next is the full combat log and debriefing of the Nordvik base mission."

Teppec: Wow... Look at this place. It's like a huge version of the UFO.
Vallhallan: Yeah, last one looked almost identical to this too.
Hero: We're not losing anyone this time! Stay together, focus fire.
Booya: Canuck, Ackbar. Watch the front. Rest of you, back here a second.

Booya: Knew it. Slimey little fuckers sneaking around behind us.

Canuck: Got one over here too!
Ackbar: The infidel glows green!
Booya: Open fire!

Teppec: Argh.. my head... What was that beam?
Ice7: There's duex!
Vallhallan: Let's try this mini-launcher!

Vallhallan: Suck it! This thing is nice and accurate too.
Booya: Yeah yeah, we'll all tell Showers about your incredible aim when we get back.

Hero: Crap, incoming plasma!

Vallhallan: AAAHHHHH!!! I'm hit! Oh god that hurts! It burns! It burns!
Ice7: Mon couilles!
Hero: Hahahaha! Oh that's going to leave a mark.

Teppec: Ahhh! What is this blue shit they keep shooting me with?
Canuck: If you're done over there, we need some help up here.

Booya: You heard him, move move move!

Teppec: Damn it, I can't hit from this range.
Vallhallan: Is that so...
Teppec: Hey, what are you doing?

Teppec: Holy fuck ow!
Vallhallan: Hahahaha, run puny human.

Teppec: Fuuuuuck!
Hero: The hell are you doing Val?
Booya: He's under their control! Everyone empty your minds so they can't make you do their bidding.
Ice:7: Done!
Booya: Yeah I figured that would be easier for some of you than others.
Ackbar: Incoming!

Canuck: Val and Ice are down!
Booya: Shoot the green one! The green one!

Hero: Whew, got them both.
Ackbar: I see no more infidels.
Booya: Get the med kits out. See how bad they're doing.
Ackbar: I will keep a watch out.

Ice7: Sacre bleu... What hit me?
Booya: A laser got you in the chest, Frenchy.
Teppec: If... I don't make it... Tell Vallhallan... I hate him.
Hero: C'mon Teppec, get up. You'll be okay.
Teppec: I think I have shrapnel in my ass...
Vallhallan: Ohhh my head... What happened.
Canuck: You shot Teppec. Twice.
Vallhallan: I don't remember anything... except this burning pain in my crotch.
Hero: Been visiting the Tijuana hookers again, eh?
Canuck: Val, you took a plasma hit there.
Booya: Is everyone up?
Hero: Teppec and Val are good for now.
Booya: Rest when we get back you wusses. We're moving on!

Ackbar: The devils' pit is vast.
Canuck: Better switch to our side arms Ackbar.
Ackbar: Right.

Hero: Alien!

Hero: Got him... give me a sec to get the med kit out, singed me a little with that plasma gun.

Ice7: Sheit! More!
Canuck: That shit goes through walls?
Teppec: That could come in useful when breaching doors.
Booya: More brilliant ideas from the think tank over there. How about this idea, Shoot them!

Vallhallan: Got one! This Skorpion isn't half bad.

Vallhallan: Ahhhrgh! My crotch! Again, why?!
Booya: Haha. Aren't you glad Showers isn't here for this one?
Canuck: Look out! On the Right!

Teppec: Walked into a hail of SMG fire.
Ice7: Zis P90 suits mi much more zen a piztol.

Booya: Got the other one. You guys okay?
Canuck: I... Can't move.
Booya: Huh, okay, wait here till Canuck is alright.

Hero: Val, behind you!

Vallhallan: Oh god why!?!
Booya: Heh... Looks like you should have been wearing some of the new enhanced armored codpieces.
Hero: Did you really need to shoot it into a puddle of blood and guts, after it was dead and on the floor?
Vallhallan: Hero, I don't expect you to understand this, but yes. Yes I did.

Vallhallan: Oh come on! That went through a wall and Booya to hit me! My balls are killing me!

Booya: Quit your bitching eunuch. I think that's the last of them.
Ackbar: Perhaps they fear your manly essence?
Vallhallan: Thanks Ackbar...

"This was a close mission. If anything had gone worse we could have lost half the squad. The medical boys deserve some credit for making those med kits able to patch up our men and keep them fighting in the middle of a mission. Booya, Vallhallan, Teppec, and Ice7 are all in medical for treatment. This leave me with only half a squad of combat ready soldiers. It's unfortunate but necessary to ground Phoenix Company for a while until the squads health recovers.

The good news is that we have taken a few of the aliens alive and are able to hold them in our new holding cells. The whole R&D department is eager to interrogate them.

This is definitely the new top priority of our research and is already underway.

With the capture of the alien base, we are now reaching into the northern parts of Russia. There are not a lot of survivors being found just yet. Most are either dead or likely fled south from the expanding Arctic Circle. I'm not sure what we will find in Asia or Europe, but the alien bases have been this way. Incidentally it's also the farthest from South America, where the Cult is still skirmishing at our borders.

In either case, the Cult has turned from a major threat into a barrier preventing us from expanding into South America. While that is a concern of mine, it is only a small problem in the big picture. All the alien activity is pulling us north and then into Asia, so Phoenix Company's attention will be else were. I've heard Snake Squad is still holding the line down there with relatively little problem.

More good news comes as a pair. I've found and recruited two new soldiers into the company. Jiang Chan Leung was found around the San Fransisco area and Vladimir Spirin was found fighting transgenants in Siberia.

This brings in some extra man power to our squad, well needed after the last mission. Even with them ready to be sent into the field I am keeping everyone at base for a few days. Leung and Spirin have been sent over to get some more advanced weapons training while the rest of the squad heals up."

--Soldiers Logs--

Posted by Colander Crotch 'Vallhallan'

Personal Log-

OH GOD FUCK! WHY? WHY? FUCK! Oh that is a pain that will not be going away for a long ass time. Jesus. Oh fuck me... Oh it still hurts.


Posted by Mutant Headcrab 'Ackbar'

Ackbar's Personal Log

I feel sorry for friend Valhallan. Surely, even the most evil of devils does not deserve the injuries he sustained on this mission. Though I made jest along with the others, I could not help but cringe when blow after blow landed upon that which makes him a man.

However, it is as the Prophet said: "Better him than me."

Posted by Canuck-Errant 'Canuck'


First things first: I hope to high heaven we get better armour soon, because I don't want to lose the boys to plasma fire. And I really don't want kevlar melted to my crotch.

I guess I should be happy for Val; it seems like he didn't suffer permanent, crippling injury - but all I can think of is "I'm glad it's not me".

I bet those're the thoughts of all the guys in the squad, too.

Second: Fresh meat. I hope they're better at surviving plasma fire than they look, because man...

...hah. Maybe I should organize something to get Val a temporary replacement twig-and-berries. Long, black, and silicone. I'm sure he'd appreciate that. Heh heh heh.

Posted by Rear Admiral BOOYA 'Booya'


Journal of Malcom McLean, ( "BOOYA") dated xx/08/2086.

Bein' squad leader has its perks. Like my ability to phase outta reality to allow alien weaponry to smack Valhallan in the goddamn dick. Poor guy, I'll bring him some whiskey to ease the pain. And then I'm gonna break the bottle on some goddamn alien's face.


Posted by lilljonas 'Hero'

Presonal Log of Megan "Hero" Okembo. Part 7.

We're back, and everyone's alive. I can't fucking believe it. The sectoids really put up a fight this time!

I feel bad for Val, I do. I'm still the only one in the squad knowing how it feels to have your body robbed from you, to almost end up being guilty of ending the life of a squad mate. Poor Teppec got some severe injuries, and half the squad are down in Med. And that was just the beginning of Val's woes, time and time again the aliens shot him in his... nether regions. The screams went from grunt of agony to peculiarly high-pitched whines. No one knows if there's any future Vallhallan JR, so to speak. The helicopter ride back home was quite a mess, it was almost like a flying medical tent. We patched up what we could, and prayed for the rest.

To be honest, while the heavy toll on the squad was a tough blow and the furious fighting and the mind control was horrifying at times, I can't help but feeling like I learnt a good lesson today. After last mission, my first one in command, I blamed myself for a lot of the things that went wrong. No less the mind control. But seeing todays mission debriefing, with Booya's experience and command skills making the best of every situation, we still took massive injuries and Val himself, with all his bravado, couldn't resist their mental attacks. Somehow, things can just fuck up even under the best leader. We can just make the best of what we get. We still have to see how Booya's condition is, I think I saw him taken to med on a stretcher after landing, but it could've been any of the others who took hits of those nasty plasma beams. We need better armour, ASAP.

When we came back, there were two new recruits outside the base, running laps around the armory. I don't know much yet, but since the med is filled up, they might see action really soon. We'll see. Now I'm off to check out the injured, I even found some synthesized ice-cream in the kitchen that I managed to get my hands on when the cook looked away. Val could need some cheering up. He made us swear to not tell Golden about anything that happened at the mission. Let's see how long that works...

End of transmission

Posted by Garfield - Der Film 'Golden'

Fuck if I know what day it is.

OH GOD! My head is killing me. Remind me to never have another drinking contest with Haggis. The man is a tank! I don't even think he felt a damn thing after all that.

Well a trip to the Armory always cheers me up, and boy howdy did it this time! Turns out the boys had brought in a new toy for us. Haggis tell me she's an AK-103. All I know is she's a beaut! I snatched her up then and there. I'll miss my old Bullpup but it'll pass.

A good portion of the team is now in medical healing up after a snag on a mission. turns out he was under mind control and went nuts on our own. I know it's true because as much as we fight he'd never turn on us.... beyond shooting me in the knee. Though he's been in there for quite awhile now, more than would be required of mind control. Something else happened out there but no one will tell me. I'll find out if it kills me.


Posted by seaborgium

Personal Log Entry 1, Bruce "seaborgium" Smith, Janitor for the Council of Earth,

Well, all those other bastards have one of these, so I get one too. Took some righteous bitching to the commander though. He kept saying "We don't have enough data storage for everyone to get a journal, we have to save it for people who go on missions, waaa waaa waaa." What a crybaby, it was the end of the world a while back, a couple megabytes or so for a text file isn't much. I tried explaining that too him, but he kept saying no.

Couple of days later he slipped on some alien blood that had spilled on the floor bringing back an alien gook, or whatever the fuck they call them. He came screaming into my office bitching and moaning about how I need to keep the place clean or people could get hurt. Saying shit like "You're vital here even if you don't go out on with the operatives", all that crap. I let him just rant for about 10 minutes, and then I just smiled and said "I know I'm vital. Glad to see you recognize it finally." Gave me some space on the network 5 minutes later. Still haven't told the bastard they just brought the body in and I hadn't had a chance to clean it yet. He doesn't need to know that, it would just worry him.

Besides, it's not liking I'm storing a shitload of porn on it or anything, it's a damned text file. Maybe that's why the commander didn't want me to have this, he's using up all the storage space with porn. That golden showers guy probably is too, damned CoE ops. Think they're all high and mighty. Don't know why he's so worried, we beat the aliens before we'll beat them again. In the mean time there's a shitload of messes to clean up. Some guy bled all over the floor on his way in, apparently multiple crotch wounds bleed a lot. Oh well, bloods blood, all cleans up the same.

---End Log