Part 4: Udoiana Raunes: Update IV - Picking Up the Pieces
You might not know it, but we're actually entering the home stretch of the game! Turns out this game made by two students, largely as a joke and then expanded into something you could call an actual game, isn't very long! And as you might have guessed, it turns out I missed several things. This is the point where I officially gave up and just consulted a walkthrough, because I couldn't get in the spirit of "rub every thing on every thing" and pixelhunting. Now, to be exact, I missed four things crucial for advancing the plot. Number one is actually the pirate treasure we need to get the first piece of the School Regulation Stone. How do we get it? Oh, that's simple.
>Pull palm tree
Oh, there was some treasure in the treetop!
>Take treasure chest
>Look at treasure chest
A chest filled with pirate gold.
Shazam, we now have a chest filled with gold. I'm fairly sure this would have taken me a good amount of time to work out - I would not have figured that pulling the palm tree would be the correct thing to do. It just sounds wrong, you know? When you tell me to imagine what "pull palm tree" would do in an adventure game, I would figure it would be a goofy death where you pull the tree down by the leaves, then get catapulted through the air and splat against something. Oh well, let's not look a gift fetchquest item in the mouth. However, even though we now have this item, our next stop is not Nepal. It is, in fact...
...the WHG! Now, there are three, count 'em, three items that we missed here, two on this very screen. Can you find them? Go ahead and try.
...did you find them? Here they are:
That grey thing that does kind of stick out a bit, but still, that's pretty rough, especially since it's embedded in a different object, making it harder to spot by sweeping around. That object is in fact...
>Look at nail
An all-purpose nail.
And the red thing in the garbage bin is a book.
Not that you could really tell, and again, it's stuck in a different object. Under closer inspection, the book turns out to be an Egyptian astronomy book, but that's not what's important about it.
>Look at Egyptian astronomy book
Wait a minute, there's a piece of paper in here.
Now this is interesting! If you'll recall, we saw some similar symbols in the pyramid in Egypt. And if my Latin doesn't fail me, that text means "pathway to the light" or something similar (I did have to look up "semita" though), and if you'll recall, the idol we saw there had light shining on it. So this is the order in which we need to step on the tiles. But we're not done here yet. Moving on to Schaffer's office:
Again, one item we missed is in this room. Can you find it?
...alright, let's see if you got it right:
>Look at lighter
A gasoline lighter... but with no gasoline!
Yup, that tiny blue thing was a lighter. And once again, it's crucial to finishing the game. Now that we have the crucial items, it's off to Nepal!
>Give treasure chest to Dr. Karin Plodeck
Ahahaha! That whole thing with the pirate treasure was just a joke! Oh well, here's your piece of the stone.
Hmmm. Hmmmmm. Call me suspicious, but I don't think this stone piece is all that kosher.
>Look at strange School Regulation Stone
Wait a minute, this isn't a piece of the School Regulation Stone!
>Look at piece of pizza dough
This pizza dough comes from a Wagner pizza.
Wagner, if you don't know, is a subsidiary of Nestlé (of course it is, every food thing is a subsidiary of the same five companies these days). They make pizzas and sell them throughout Europe. They're alright.
>Look at salami
Original boar salami from Prague.
Is Prague notable for its salami?
>Look at mushroom
An amanita mushroom.
The original line here refers to a "Knollenblätterpilz", which generally means "amanita", but more directly refers to the Death Cap, which is most definitely not something you want on a pizza. I may not remember the classes in which we covered mushrooms too well (fuck, must have been third grade or so), but for some reason I connect "Knollenblätterpilz" with "bad", which isn't surprising, given that a great amount of the amanita genus is poisonous, much of it lethally so. Seems like kind of a weird thing to throw in when you just could have called it a champignon (agaricus bisporus, a very common mushroom used in cooking). Maybe it being lethal is the joke? It's not like I can use items on Raunes, so eh. Anyway, moving on, we have a complaint to make.
>Talk to Dr. Karin Plodeck
- That thing you gave me was a piece of pizza!
- It's been an honor, Mrs. Plodeck!
Oh, er, really? What was it you wanted from me again?
I wanted your personal piece of the School Regulation Stone.
Oh, right, now I remember!
That gets us the School Regulation stone, but we're not done with Plodeck just yet. We need to talk to her again to get a crucial item.
>Talk to Dr. Karin Plodeck
- Could you tell me where I can find Heinz Schaffer?
- It's been an honor, Mrs. Plodeck!
- Mrs. Plodeck, what are your plans for the WHG?
I don't know! When the mass of revolting students stormed the secretary's office, we were currently immersed in a conversation. We escaped through different windows and haven't seen each other since.
It's been an honor, Mrs. Plodeck!
The pleasure's all mine!
Mrs. Plodeck, what are your plans for the WHG?
I have concrete ideas, but I don't have a plan. But let's not debate over school matters right now.
Regardless of what you say here, this follows:
Please, take a seat and have some of the local national beverage with me!
- I can't accept that.
- But Mrs. Plodeck, that's a bit too much!
- I'm not insane!
- I don't have enough time!
Regardless of what you say, this follows:
Then at least take a glass with you. Maybe you'll get thirsty on your travels!
And with that, we now have a third of the full School Regulation Stone, and also a mug of the local brew.
>Look at School Regulation Stone (SRS)
One third of the solution to our problem.
>Look at Nepalese national beverage
Whoa there, this is gasoline!
Gasoline, you say?
>Use Nepalese national beverage with lighter
It's full now.
>Look at lighter
It should work now.
Excellent. Now, with one third of the stone and our lighter refilled, let's head to the pyramid.
Here, we get to now walk from tile to tile and fiddle with the movement engine, which is... a bit quirky. Here's a video of me fiddling about with the stuff in the pyramid while nice music plays. Spoilers: I die a lot.
Anyway, here's the way we need to go. Suffice it to say that things went wrong and I had to look into the book a lot.
Now, let's see if we can't work out how to get the pearl, which I suppose is in this idol.
It won't stay open. I need something to hold it up.
God damnit. Right, so we need to prop this sumbitch up somehow. Maybe that stick we had earlier?
>Take apart shovel
>Use wooden staff with idol
The staff is too long. I need to halve it somehow.
Alright. We have a wooden stick, and we need to halve it. We can't just break it in half. What do we use? Simple! Now, just bear with me here.
>Use albatross head with deep sea fish
Whoa, it's still alive!
This gives us two new items, an albatross head, and an albatross beak. Now, we can't just use the beak to saw through the staff, we need to fix it somehow.
>Use albatross head with nail
>Look at albatross beak scissors
This should work!
Presto! Now we have a pair of albatross beak scissors. This makes total sense.
>Use albatross beak scissors with wooden staff
And now we finally have our shortened piece of wood.
>Look at halved wooden staff
Halved, but still cylindrical and good!
>Use halved wooden staff with idol
Yayifications! We can finally get to the pearl (the little yellow thing)!
Alright, we finally got what we came for and can get our second piece of the stone!
>Look at Theban pearl
A golden pearl!
But wait, what happened to the Nepalese national beverage we were lugging around?
>Look at Nepalese national beverage
The book seems to be dissolving in the gasoline. I can't read it like this.
Welp. Sure hope you remember the way out! Thankfully, I did... by and large. Still had to make some safety saves. Now, back to Crete!
>Give Theban pearl to Dr. Buhmann
Thank you. What can I do for you now?
- I need your School Regulation Stone.
- Do you know where Heinz Schaffer is currently located?
But no matter what you say...
But first, wouldn't you like to know why I made you get this pearl in the first place?
- Yes, I'm very interested in your explanations.
- Start babbling!
- God damn, is this ever going to end?
Now, the way this works is that he's going to start talking, and we can basically either tell him to shut up or continue. I'll just skip the different options and just let him talk.
Yes, I'm very interested in your explanations.
This pearl is indispensable in deciphering the Minoan alphabet.
What does an Egyptian pearl have to do with the Minoan alphabet?
As you know, the Minoan lettering - Linear A - is currently untranslatable. Is the Rosetta Stone familiar to you?
No, what's that now?
The Rosetta Stone allowed us to decipher the Egyptian hieroglyphs! On it, there was the same text in two languages: Greek and Egyptian!
And what's the relation to the Minoans and the pearl?
North of Crete, there is an island named Santorin, which held a Minoan trading harbor. We assume there to be something similar to the Rosetta Stone.
Ah, mhmm, yes, oh, er, yes?
Recently, a machine for the exchange of goods from the BC times was found there. Sadly, it wasn't possible to break into it! And that's why we need the pearl! From it, we hope to get some sort of receipt in Linear-A!
And now, Raunes has had enough.
Where the hell is the stone??!??
I have no idea what you're talking about! The important part is that you understand... Santorin... wax receipt... hydrologically operated... functioning... archaeology lives...
And now he's REALLY had enough.
Wait a moment! I still have this ancient, rock-hard piece of pizza. Maybe this will help you.
And he gives us the second piece of the School Regulation Stone. Finally...
>Use School Regulation Stone with School Regulation Stone
They fit together perfectly!
>Look at two School Regulation Stones
1+1=2; 2+?=3; 3-2=1; only one third left!
Marvelous mastery of math there, Raunes. Anyway, that'll be it for this time. Next time, we'll finish this journey off as we find Heinz Schaffer in an unexpected place, and find the last School Regulation Stone!
Recap: Turns out that when people say they'll give you something if you give them something ridiculous, they're usually joking, but no matter to us. We shake a pirate treasure from a fucking palm tree and give it to Plodeck in exchange for her piece of the SRS, and get some gasoline to drink from her to boot. That's only one step below battery acid on the list of things I don't want to fucking drink, but it's still useful. We also grab some random shit from the WHG because I need better point-and-click-adventure-vision. Udoiana Raunes then gets flattened several times on his way through the pyramid because symbols are hard to read, and fashions some scissors out of the beak of an albatross, which he separates from the head by using a deep sea fish he thought was dead, but somehow survived being carted around through several long plane flights, all just to cut a fucking piece of wood in half. We get the pearl, bring it back to Buhmann, get waffled at for a while, and get the second piece of the SRS.