The Let's Play Archive

Vanguard Bandits

by Smasher Dynamo

Part 72: Chapter #13: Runaway Princess

dis astranagant posted:

Can we just ignore the fact that Sadira has lines for the remainder of the game? It will make the rest of it so much more tolerable.

No.

Chapter #13: Runaway Princess

Briefing



: Until we learn otherwise, we have to assume that she's here to fight!
: You know happens when you assume, Reyna. Besides, she's not in any sort of attack formation. I am, however, somewhat concerned with the squadron of ATACs coming up behind her.
: The Imperial Army? Faulkner?! I won't let them hurt you, Bastion!
: Thank you, Milea, but I'm quite able to take care of myself.
: Are you, Bastion? Does that mean you've finally started washing your own dirty underwear?
: Uh...you're supposed to wash those?
Humor!

Interview



: You see, Bastion? Not only is Milea in fine health, but her tumble off the cliff has turned her into a genius!
: Does this mean we don't get to do any fishing? I'm really hungry!
: Milea got lucky, Bastion...and if you play your cards right, so will you.
: I didn't mean to cause you trouble, Bastion. I promise to help you from this day forward!

Mission



Not even the characters in the game are happy to see Sadira.
: Oh, no! It's the Kingdom Army! And the ATAC leading them is...but it couldn't be!
: Hello, Sadira.
: Uh--hello?
: Why have you come here? Did you follow us?
: Prince Bastion! It's you! But I'm certain that the Ultragunner was claimed by General Faulkner!
: This isn't the Ultragunner, Sadira. Now answer the question! Why did you follow us here, and what you you want?
: It's a long story.
Not again...
: Please wait, Princess!



That is a surprising number of Korbelans...
: I understand your frustration, Princess, but running away from the capital will not help matters! I beg you to reconsider your actions. Hmmmm? What's this?
: Bastion! You were stalling me until they could catch up, weren't you?!
: No, I wasn't, Sadira! I was trying to find out why you're here, and now I know, thanks to Franco! Why have you run away from the Empire? And aren't you a little old to be a runaway?
: You don't understand what's going on, Bastion, so I suggest that you still your tongue!
: Prince Bastion! It's good to see you here! Your timing is impeccable! I ask for your help in seizing the Princess before she causes herself any more trouble! She doesn't understand that running away is the worst possible course of action she could have taken! Please, Bastion! Seize her quickly!
: I'm starting to feel like we've just stumbled into the middle of a very messy situation.
: I know that you'll help me, Bastion! You and your friends have to drive Franco away from here!
: We don't have to do anything, Sadira!
: You're no better than anyone else, Sadira, and yet you always act as if you are! Bastion isn't just another Imperial subject you can order around!
: And who are YOU?!
: My name is Milea. Bastion and I have grown up together! We are the best of friends!
: You and he are 'friends'? You're quire emotional for someone who claims only to have feelings of friendship, aren't you?
: And you seem to be quite jealous of our friendship, Sadira! Perhaps it's you who's hiding your feelings!
You know, thank God this wasn't voice-acted...
: Don't be silly.
: Princess! Please! Don't make me use force to return you to the capital!
: Let's all go back together, Princess! It'll be so much better if we don't have to fight!



Are we ready to fight, yet?
: NOW what?
: If you protect me from Franco and the others, I'll tell you something I know you want to hear!
: That you're going to leave me alone for the rest of my life?
: Very funny! What I'll tell you is the location of the Ultragunner, and its most treasured secret! This is information you won't find anywhere else, Bastion. I'm the only one who has it! Besides, aren't you embarrassed to be driving that ATAC instead of the Ultragunner? Come on, admit it!
: I'm not embarrassed to be piloting the TICTAC! I'm proud! I'm certain that this ATAC is just as powerful as the Ultragunner, if not more so.
: Perhaps it is, but what will other people think when they see it? Will they be as impressed? The Ultragunner is an ATAC of legend, Bastion! It's guaranteed to impress or intimidate anyone who sees it!
: (I hate it when she makes reasoned and rational statements!)
: Oh, well. I suppose your TICTAC will be fine for all the unnecessary combat you'll be getting into.
: (I hope I don't hurt Puck's feelings too badly by doing this...) Alright, Sadira. You have a deal. We'll drive away the Imperials, and you'll tell us where the Ultragunner is hidden...as well as its secret.
: What?!
: That's right, Bastion! I guarantee that this secret will rock you to your very foundations.
: (I think she's lying to you, Bastion.)
: Well, everyone? Do you have any objections to defending Sadira?
Yes. Number One: I hate Sadira. Number Two: So does everyone else. Number Three: She earlier seemed to be unable to distinguish between the Ultragunner and TICTAC which implies that she's full of shit. Number Fou-
: Not as long as we get to eat dinner when we're done!
: Not a problem, buddy. I've been hoping to get some action--on the battlefield, but of course.
: Bastion, I've noticed something very interesting about you.
: What's that?
: You are completely unable to say no to a woman. I'll have to keep that in mind! Heh, heh, heh!
: That's, uh, nice. But let's change the subject with haste, shall we? Franco! I don't have any quarrel with you, but I need to know what Sadira has offered to tell me.
: Don't be fooled, Prince Bastion! She knows nothing of the Ultragunner, nor of any secrets! She will say whatever will lead you to defend her from us!
: Are you calling your own Princess a liar, Franco?!
: I don't mean it like that-
: I swear on my honor that I am not lying to you, Bastion! And I swear that I will not forgive you for insulting me, Franco! Prepare for your humiliating defeat!
: Princess!
: Bastion!
: (Sigh...) Yes, Sadira?
: I won't forgive you if you harm Franco, Cecilia, or anyone else!
: I wasn't intending to harm anyone to begin with, Sadira!



Okay, it's time for the fight to begin! Once again, it's not a hard fight, with two provisos. First, the Korbelans have crazy good movement, so they'll be able to flank you, which is kind of irritating as they'll go for Reyna and Barlow first. Second, Franco and Cecilia will run away at half-health, and Sadira isn't under you control, meaning you aren't apt to be able to kill them before Sadira pokes them into fleeing.



Still, they aren't exactly tough. First blood goes to Milea!



: I would ask you to retreat before we are forced into further conflict.
: I can't do that! I can't return to the capital without the Princess in my possession! You don't understand, Bastion! You don't realize what's really going on here! Without the Princess, I...I'm doomed.
: What do you mean?
: It's Halak! She will be enraged with me!
: Uh, Halak?
: The elder woman who uses the High Speech of the ancients. You could not have forgotten her.
No matter how hard I try...
: I vaguely recall her, yes.
: You don't understand the terror she will put me through, Bastion.
: Apparently not. But I made a promise to Sadira, and I intend to keep it. You won't take her back if she doesn't want to go.
: How can you be so cruel?!



: Princess Sadira, I will never forget your behavior on this day! I thought I was your friend, but I see that I was mistaken!
Fucked, you are, Franco.

: You're a very mean person, Princess! I'm telling Halak on you!
I guess Cecilia will betray Sadira on every branch...



I'm not showing my screenshots, because the Korbelans are pretty fast, but simply don't have the power to actually knock you out. So, well, the battle really comes down to just wearing them down until they're all dead.

: (We've driven them off...But I'm still not sure whether or not it was a good idea.)



Meanwhile, it's time to check in on Madoc and Faulkner!

: Do you bring the news I have been waiting to hear, Madoc?
: If you refer to news of Ultragunner, then I do.
: Have you awakened it at last?!
: In fact...it had collected quite a thick layer of dust, so I had it washed.
: Madoc, you are a cruel and twisted persecutor of hearts. Did you come here merely to amuse yourself at my expense, or have you news of real import?
: My new ATAC design is complete, Faulkner, and I was hoping that you would permit a test sortie. Once you have witnessed the power of my invention, you will forget that the Ultragunner even existed!
: Let me correct my earlier statement, Madoc: you are a cruel, twisted, and arrogant old man.
: I've always considered arrogance to be nothing more than an honest version of confidence. Authorize the test and you will understand what an incredible accomplishment this ATAC is.
: Alright, Madoc. You'll have your test. Because whether it fails or succeeds, I will be delighted by the results. All that must be decided now is who shall take your ATAC into battle.
: Actually, Faulkner, I already had a particular candidate in mind.
Only one man is capable of leading this mission. The Teutonic Titan, The Allemanic Achilles, the Deutsche Dominiator, the Prussian Puncher, the Bavarian Battler, the Rheinlander Reaver, the...well, you get the idea.
: Commander Zakov?
: I didn't realize you were a mind-reader in addition to a warrior!
: The choice was obvious, Madoc. Only Zakov is worthy of such a high-risk, low-reward mission.
: You make it sound as though Zakov is useless for any other purpose.
: Am I wrong?
: Not at all. He's a simpleton. A babbling buffoon.
: Heh, heh, heh.
: Ha, ha, ha!
: I shall inform him of the sortie and order him to report to you at once.
: We must act quickly, before our good fortune runs out and Sadira returns to the capital.
: Indeed, Madoc.
: With the data I gather from Zakov's sortie, I can prepare the new design for mass production. The Ultragunner will be irrelevant, Faulkner, and the Continent will be powerless to stop us.
: Indeed, Madoc. You are preaching to the choir, Madoc, and I am savoring every delicious word you speak. Prepare your ATAC...



: What do you mean?
We're about to be boned, aren't we?
: The location of the Ultragunner? The amazing secret? Tell us what you know?
: I don't know anything.
: Well, I suppose that can't be helped...Wait! What do you mean, you don't know anything!
: I know that everyone is fighting over it because of its awesome power. And I know that you're the only person who can control it.
: You swore on your honor as an Imperial Princess that you were telling the truth!
: No, I was swearing on my honor as a runaway girl, and runaways will lie their brains out!
: Of course they will.
: Even for a woman, this is incredibly evil behavior.
: Heh, heh, heh! Is there a woman who DOESN'T get Bastion into trouble?
: I knew your were lying, and I knew you were a despicable person!
: I'm so disgusted that I may have lost my appetite...oh, wait, there it is.
: Please, everyone, let me explain why I ran away from the Empire!
: I don't think we particularly care at this point, Sadira.
Wait! Let's hear her out! I'm sure it will mitigate the frustration all of you are feeling!
: It's the old bag's fault! Halak drives me crazy with her endless restrictions on what I can and cannot do! If I had allowed it continue any longer, she would have crushed my personality--my uniqueness! I didn't want to lose myself!
: I wouldn't particularly mind if you lost the spoiled-brat portion of your personality, by the way.
: Now that you know why I'm here, you won't be angry anymore, right?
: Anger is just one of the emotions I'm feeling toward you at this moment.
: You have to take pity on me after hearing my story!
: Oh, I pity you, alright.
: I'm sorry I was angry at you, Sadira. We're all sorry, aren't we?
: I'm sorry I didn't run away from this ridiculous when I had the chance!
: Of course I forgive you, Sadira. Life is too short to hold a grudge against anyone. ALMOST anyone, I mean.
: I forgive you, Sadira, but only if you promise to try some of my chocolate! It's guaranteed to cheer you up!
: Of course, Barlow! Now that I'm not under Halak's control, I can gorge myself on sweets if I want to!
: Sorry, Sadira, but you can't. The first rule of our group is that liars don't get any chocolate...



: Unless you're planning on running away from US, too.
: Why are you being so rude to me?!
: Because you lied to me, Sadira, and I was foolish enough to trust you.
: Fine, Bastion! If you want me to run away from you, I will!
: That's not what I said, Sadira, if you had been listening to me, which you seem to find impossible to do. Besides, where will you go?
: I'll just walk along the border, so I can avoid both the Kingdom and the Empire! Simple, really!
: Close, but I think the word you were looking for is "stupid."
: Ha, ha, ha! You don't understand! With the Sylpheed, I can escape or defeat anyone I encounter! I will live off the land! I'll explore regions of the Continent which have never before been witnessed!
: Or perhaps you will merely end up hopelessly lost! You need to stay here with us, Sadira!
: Nonsense, Milea! If Bastion doesn't believe I can survive on my own, I'll just have to prove it to him!
: Actually, Sadira, I'd be extremely impressed if you could merely guide us all back to Araba Castle.
: Are you kidding? That's barely a challenge at all, Reyna...but I accept! Let's see if you can keep up!



: Uh...of course! I just had to make sure that you were paying attention!
This game will stop at nothing to make you hate Sadira...
: If you were paying attention, Sadira, you would have noticed those ATACs on your scanners!
: What ATACs?
: And my point is made.

Next Time: The Sharking makes its third debut! And Sadira...always Sadira...

The Contest is still open!